I’ll Shed These Walls For You - FallFromtheStars - 文豪ストレイドッグス (2024)

Chapter 1 Chapter Text

Chuuya sighed as he sat outside at his favorite restaurant. It was a lovely day with a soft breeze and the sun out. He was exhausted from the long workday. Being a port mafia executive could be needlessly stressful at times. He was waiting patiently for his food to arrive, sipping on a glass of wine. He looked over and saw all the stray cats nearby. They would usually stay outside of any restaurants that had outdoor eating. Some of them were familiar to Chuuya. The little calico, the black cat with the big green eyes, the white one with black spots. Chuuya had come here often enough to become familiar with them. But he noticed there was one new one. A little brown tabby. He realized the cat was looking straight at him. It had big brown eyes and a nicked ear.

Chuuya’s food arrived, making him finally look away from the little creature. He started eating, humming as he tasted it. This was one of his favorite places to eat for a reason. Their food was delicious. As soon as his food came out, some of the cats started to surround him. Despite being a mafia executive, Chuuya was soft-hearted when it came to animals so he often fed the cats. Some of the cats, like the little calico, would always come right up to him. He noticed the little brown tabby looking at him curiously, staying a safe distance away. Chuuya could practically see its ribs.

He threw a piece of meat to the cat and it almost jumped into the air in surprise before hurriedly eating it. It was a very pretty cat. He hadn’t seen many cats with brown eyes like that one. He threw more and more to the little cat, throwing each piece a little closer to him to encourage it to come closer. It slowly inched closer and closer as it ate the food. He fed the other cats as well but there was something about this little brown tabby. Something was intriguing him. Maybe it was just that he had never seen it before. But he didn’t know. The cat’s big eyes seemed to be calling for him. Asking him for something he couldn’t identify. The other cats soon got their fill and dispersed. But not the brown tabby. Even though Chuuya was sure he was feeding it the same amount of food, if not more. The cat stared at him with its big brown eyes. Chuuya noticed that the cat had bandages on it. Was it injured? It was clearly a stray so why did it have bandages?

As if the cat noticed where Chuuya was looking, it curled up more as if to hide the bandages. Chuuya chuckled a bit. He was feeling a bit off today it seemed. He was a logical person. The cat obviously wasn’t trying to hide the bandages. It must just be tired or cold. Chuuya gave it another piece of food which it eagerly took. Now, the cat was within touching distance. Chuuya admired its pattern. The darker stripes along its back. Its underbelly was a lighter shade of brown than the rest of its body. It had a long tail that swished from side to side. It was a long cat, lanky. There were so many curiosities about it. There was no way it was a pet because of how skinny it was but then why did it have bandages? Did someone spend money to take it to the vet only to let it go right after? Chuuya wondered if maybe it was a runaway.

The cat got closer, looking up at Chuuya from his feet. Chuuya offered it another piece of meat, which it took from his hand. Chuuya smiled. He loved winning the trust of these animals. Animals were easy. If you gave them food and showed them no harm, they would trust you. Humans were hard. They were so complicated. The little cat even licked at Chuuya’s gloves. Chuuya cautiously reached out and stroked the cat’s head. The cat didn’t run or hiss, accepting the pet.

“I like your markings. Why do you have bandages?” Chuuya whispered even though the cat wouldn’t understand him. But almost as if it understood, it shifted again, hiding some of its bandages from view. Chuuya hummed. He didn’t really know how to describe the feeling inside him right now. Something was off about this situation but he couldn’t put his finger on what it was. What was with this cat? It rubbed itself against Chuuya’s legs, making him smile. He ran his fingers through its soft fur. He was tempted to take off his gloves to feel its fur but he wasn’t one to take off his gloves so easily. “Are you hurt?”

The cat glared at him as if telling him to stop worrying about the bandages. Chuuya knew he was just imagining it, but it really felt like this cat was understanding what he was saying. The cat stretched into each pet and then it finally jumped into his lap. He let out a surprised noise and he was glad that no one was around to hear. Except the cat of course, which was looking at him with what could only be described as a teasing expression.

“Shut up,” Chuuya blushed and growled. He didn’t know why he felt embarrassed. It was just a damn cat. Chuuya kept eating, now with the brown cat in his lap. As he petted it, his hand would sometimes pause on the bandages, his curiosity wanting to peel them back to look at what was underneath but each time he did that the cat would tense and start growling a bit. Chuuya knew better than to risk getting bit by this cat because of his curiosity. He kept feeding the cat little scraps since he could feel its ribs pressing against his thigh. He wondered who would just kick this pretty cat out of their home. He knew it must have belonged to someone at some point due to how comfortable it seemed to be around humans. After some time, the cat started to purr. Chuuya felt the deep rumble against his thighs, making him smile. “You’re pretty.”

He felt the cat’s claws sink into his thigh, making him hiss through his teeth as the cat kneaded at his flesh. And he had just complemented the little gremlin.

“So you’re a brat,” Chuuya growled as he continued to pet. The cat’s claws kept sinking into his thigh. It looked up at him with an innocent-looking expression. It reminded Chuuya of kids looking at you when they know they’ve done something bad. But that wasn’t true, obviously. He needed to stop reading into a damn cat’s behavior. Maybe Kouyou was right and he was lonely. She kept telling him to go to a club and at least find a guy to have a fling with. But Chuuya just wasn’t that type of person. He wanted relationships to last and when you’re in the mafia, you don’t get a lot of those. “Maybe I should just take you home, little guy.”

The cat looked up at him with those big brown eyes. He wondered what it was thinking. But even if he wanted to, he couldn’t. He wasn’t prepared for a cat in his home. Maybe he could set up and come back for it but it would probably be long gone by then. He sighed. He felt a headache coming. He should go home and get some rest but the cat seemed so comfortable in his lap.

“Come back another day, okay? I come here to eat a lot. Come visit me again,” Chuuya whispered even though he knew the cat couldn’t understand. But it still looked up at him with its big brown eyes and meowed. He scratched behind its ears and listened to it purr. Even though he was more of a dog person, he had to admit how cute this cat was. “You gotta let me see under your bandages someday so I can check if you’re injured.”

The cat’s fur spiked and it hissed at him. It was such a strange response since Chuuya didn’t reach for the bandages or anything. It really was like this cat could understand. He chuckled and put his hands up as if in surrender. The cat jumped off of him but stayed close by. Chuuya paid for his meal and pet it one last time before starting his walk to his apartment. He turned around and saw the cat strutting away with its tail in the air. Chuuya wondered if it was satisfied since it had a full belly now. He shook his head. He was putting way too much emotion on a random cat. But his curiosity wouldn’t let it rest. It was definitely a strange cat. He sighed in relief as he stepped into his large apartment. Such a beautiful apartment but it was only him here.

Maybe he really should look into getting a cat. They were less work than a dog after all and he would have some company.

Chapter 2 Chapter Text

“So, this brown tabby came up and I swear it felt like it knew what I was saying,” Chuuya finished telling his story. Kouyou had a soft smile on her face. He often felt like a kid when she looked at him like that.

“I see. Have you thought about what I told you to do?” Kouyou asked, her eyes full of concern. Chuuya sighed. He knew she was just concerned but it still annoyed him.

“Hooking up with someone isn’t going to help my loneliness. I was thinking of maybe adopting a cat,” he said. Kouyou’s eyes lit up and she nodded at the idea.

“That would be good for you. They’re easy to care for. Get one from a shelter, don’t just pick up one off the streets. You don’t know what diseases it may have,” Kouyou curled her lip in disgust. Chuuya shook his head. He was getting ready for a mission so this was the last time he would talk with Kouyou today. She often acted like a doting older sister to him.

“I just told you about a street cat I liked and that’s what you say,” he chuckled. He strapped his guns to his body. Kouyou looked at him with worried eyes.

“You know you don’t have to go on these dangerous missions, right? You’re an executive. Just have your subordinates do it,” her gentle voice was tinged with concern. Chuuya shook his head. No matter how many times he went on a mission, she always responded in the same way. But Chuuya wasn’t like other executives. He preferred to be on the field. That was one of the reasons his subordinates respected him so much. It was dangerous, of course, but he was confident in his abilities.

“You know that’s not how I do things,” he said, simply. She sighed, still looking worried. He squeezed her shoulder before setting off.

__________________

Everything ached. He hadn’t expected them to use explosives. He was on his bed, collapsed there as he pressed a cloth against his wound. He had gotten too co*cky. He grunted at the pain, closing his eyes. He was starving after the mission but he didn’t have the energy to cook and he definitely couldn’t go outside with a gaping wound.

The large apartment felt so empty as Chuuya grunted in pain as he sewed his wound. He knew he could call Kouyou but he didn’t want her fawning over him like a child. He hissed through his teeth as he finished. He was covered in sweat from that intense pain but it was finally done. He covered the wound with bandages and threw his bloody clothes into the washer. He slipped on a casual outfit, checking his gloves to make sure no blood got on them. He had removed them to stitch his wound and sighed in relief as he slipped them back on. He never felt comfortable without them. He stepped out of his apartment, waving at the security guard he had outside his home. The man looked at him with wide eyes, surprised to see him looking so clean when he was such a mess just a couple of minutes ago.

Chuuya walked through the streets of Yokohama. He was heading to his favorite restaurant again. He couldn’t help the spark of hope that lit up in his chest as he thought of maybe seeing the little brown tabby again. Maybe this time he could peek under the bandages. He chuckled as he realized they would be matching. The wound still hurt as he walked but it was manageable.

He got his usual seat outside and looked at the stray cats. He couldn’t help but sigh in disappointment when he saw that the brown tabby wasn’t there. The other cats recognized him though. They approached him as usual and allowed him to pet them. He noticed an interesting run walk away though. Another cat he hadn’t seen before. A white one with black stripes. Like a white tiger. He wondered where all these new strays were coming from. Was someone just dropping cats off on the street? He shook his head and returned to petting the cats.

They brought his food out quickly as if the servers could sense his hunger. He immediately started eating, sighing in relief. He looked down when he heard the sound of meowing. At his feet was the brown tabby. The black-striped cat was next to it, looking between the two of them. Chuuya smiled widely. Just the cat he wanted to see.

He patted his lap and the cat jumped into it. Its nose twitched and started sniffing at where Chuuya’s injury was. He hissed through his teeth when it head-butted that spot. He grabbed it by the scruff of the neck to keep it back.

“You f*cking asshole. You know what you’re doing,” he looked the cat in the eyes as he said it. The cat looked back at him with those big brown eyes, tilting its head in a mock show of innocence. He huffed as he put it back down on his lap, but kept a strong hold on it so it wouldn’t return to his injury.

Instead, the cat reached its paws out, kneading at the flesh of his thighs again. He cursed softly but it didn’t hurt as bad. His thighs only ached, they weren’t injured. But still, the damn cat was a brat. It looked up at him as if it knew exactly what it was doing.

“Today was rough,” he whispered as he gave the cat a bit of his food as well as throwing some to the rest of the cats as well. The cat was purring in his lap and was looking up at him. “I had a mission today. I’m a mafia executive. Usually, that means just sitting back and allowing my subordinates to do the hard work but I’m just not that type of guy.”

He didn’t know why he was explaining everything to this cat as if it would understand. Maybe he really was as lonely as Kouyou thought. He sighed. He stroked through the cat’s fur. He could still feel its ribs. He scratched it behind the ears and it leaned into his hand. He smiled. It was nice.

“Anyways, I didn’t expect them to have explosives. I’m skilled in combat and it’s easy for me to deal with bullets, but explosives are another story,” Chuuya sighed. He used his ability to make his food float as if trying to demonstrate it to the cat. The cat looked at it in awe, reaching its paw up to steal a piece of food. He put his food back down, feeling Arahabaki recede back inside. It was such an odd feeling, the god receding back inside of him after he used its power. He still hadn’t fully come to terms with his own humanity even after all these years. The cat distracted him from his thoughts by head-butting his wound again. He grabbed it and held it up in the air. The cat squirmed and struggled until finally, Chuuya set it back down. “You’re an asshole.”

The cat let out a little “mrph” before settling down in Chuuya’s lap, becoming a puddle. He chuckled as he scratched it. He couldn’t help but be fond of it. He knew Kouyou told him to get a cat from a shelter but he was seriously considering picking up this cat and bringing it home with him. It seemed friendly enough, if not a little mischievous.

“Anyways, I got hurt. It’s rare for me. Ane-San says that I’m lonely and stressed and it’s affecting my performance. Maybe she’s right. But you can’t really have long-lasting relationships while in the mafia. They will eventually be used against you and I don’t want to have anyone get hurt just because they were associated with me,” Chuuya vented out all of his frustration to the little ball of fur. The cat rubbed against him, purring. Chuuya smiled and petted it more. “You’re friendly. Are you like this with anyone who gives you food?”

The cat only purred in response. Chuuya was quickly finding all of the cat’s sweet spots to pet.

“Did you get kicked out of your old home because you’re an asshole?” He chuckled, thumbing at the edge of one of the bandages. The cat was tense as if expecting Chuuya to rip it off at any time. He felt the warning claws in his thighs and continued his petting. “You should come home with me.”

Almost as if it understood, it immediately jumped off Chuuya’s lap, looking up at him for a moment before trotting off. Chuuya was tempted to go after it but shook his head. If it wanted to come with him then it would. He couldn’t help the hurt he felt though. He shook his head again. It wasn’t like the cat could understand him. He had no reason to feel upset. He quickly finished the rest of his food and headed home.

Chapter 3 Chapter Text

Chuuya rarely ever got any days off so he was savoring the day. The streets of Yokohama were bustling, as usual. He suddenly came to a halt as a familiar brown tabby came scrambling towards him. The cat climbed him like a tree and stood on his shoulders. Chuuya was confused until he saw a group of children running towards him. The cat hissed at them. Chuuya reached up and stroked its fur as he crouched.

“You can’t go chasing cats like that. They don’t like it. You scared it,” Chuuya said gently to the children. The kids pouted. One of them tried reaching up to pet the cat but it only hissed and tried to claw her. He stood up as he saw that the children understood. He started walking again but the cat didn’t jump off. It stayed on his shoulders. He thought it was cute until the damn cat grabbed his hat and threw it off. He had to scramble to grab it. As punishment, he grabbed the cat and held it by its scruff as he walked. “That’s no way to thank someone who saved your ass.”

The cat hissed at him and Chuuya shook his head in exasperation. It truly felt like this cat could understand what he was saying. He put it back on his shoulders, knowing it could jump off at any time it wanted.

“You’re lucky you’re cute 'cause you’re kind of an asshole,” Chuuya chuckled. The cat kneaded at his shoulders in response. “Maybe I should give you a nickname or something. I don’t want to keep referring to you as the cat.”

The cat rubbed its face against his neck. But Chuuya wasn’t the most creative person. He had no idea what he should name it. He didn’t even know if it was a boy or a girl. The idea of taking the cat home was getting more and more appealing. He spends very little time in his home nowadays. It was so empty that he couldn’t bear it. But he would need to take it to the vet first. Maybe then he could know what was under those bandages. The cat didn’t smell like blood so he doubted there were any open injuries but it was better to be sure.

“Do you like it up there?” Chuuya chuckled. He was surprised the tabby was staying on his shoulders. Maybe it was scared the children would come running back. “Kids don’t know how to act with animals. It’s not their fault. They’re just not educated about it. I’m guessing they were rough with you.”

He reached up to scratch it behind the ears. He felt the rumble of the cat’s purr against his shoulders. It was calming. He wondered where he should go now. The cat didn’t seem ready to jump off any time soon.

“It’s been a while since I’ve had a companion. Ane-San is always so busy that I can barely spend time with her. Tachihara is always busy with something. He never tells me what it is though. Akutagawa is a mess at all times. I don’t even know if that kid knows how to hang out with someone,” Chuuya rambled. It became painfully obvious just how lonely he was. “But I can’t make friends outside the mafia. I can’t put them in danger. I refuse to do that.”

Not like that stopped anything in the past. Memories of the flags came to his mind. That was a time when he had friends. His steps became sluggish as he remembered what happened to them. Is that what was doomed to come to anyone who was close to him? He didn’t even know if he was human or not. The cat seemed to notice his mood and knocked his hat off again. He cursed the cat as he picked it up.

“Stop that! You’re such a dick,” Chuuya growled. But he couldn’t deny that it got his mind off the dark place it had gone to. While walking, he saw that strange black-striped cat. He had never seen a cat that looked like that before. The tabby jumped off his shoulders and ran to the cat. He expected them to start fighting but the tabby rubbed against the other cat and they both purred. Chuuya chuckled. He didn’t expect stray cats to befriend each other. He crouched by the two of them and petted them both. The black-striped cat leaned into the touch. This cat wasn’t skinny like the tabby. It had long, thick, and glossy fur. A major difference from the unkempt-looking tabby that Chuuya had grown so fond of. Maybe it was someone’s pet that was allowed outside?

Chuuya stood up and went into a nearby shop, buying some tuna. When he went back outside, the two cats were still there. They were grooming each other. He opened the can of tuna and put it down. The tabby immediately took the opportunity and started to eat but the other one stayed away. Chuuya smiled.

“Gonna let your friend have it?” He asked as he petted the striped cat. The cat purred and head-butted his hand. The two of them watched the little tabby eat.

He reached out to scratch the tabby and it only purred, not showing any aggression at being pet while eating. It was a good sign that it may make a good pet. He thumbed at one of the bandages. He needed to get it to a vet before he took it home though. The cat stopped eating and tensed as soon as Chuuya started touching the bandages so he withdrew his hand. The cat went back to eating.

____________________

Chuuya sighed. He was left on babysitting duty again. Mori had told him to look after Elise because she was quite fond of him. Chuuya didn’t understand why she had to constantly be around since she was an ability. He trudged along as she insisted on taking Chuuya to all of her favorite places. She kept complaining about Mori as she did.

Chuuya had always found the… Relationship between Mori and his ability to be disgusting. But he didn’t have a say in it. Mori was his boss. Elise’s eyes lit up as she found some stray cats. She immediately ran to them, grabbing them roughly as she tried to pick up a white cat. The cat struggled and clawed at her until she finally let go.

“Chuuya-Nii! Go get the cat for me!” Elise demanded. Chuuya sighed and shook his head. He was doing a lot of sighing today. He grabbed Elise’s hand.

“You can’t just go grabbing them. It scares them. Cats are living creatures too,” Chuuya explained. Elise pouted as she crossed her arms.

“It’s not fair. I haven’t been able to play with a kitty in a while. Our kitty ran away,” she sniffled. Chuuya could understand why the cat ran if it was being treated like that.

“Did you like your cat?” He asked. She scrunched up her nose and sniffled.

“I guess. He was kind of mean. I always had to grab him by the tail to get him to be near me,” she said while wiping away her tears. Chuuya definitely understood why the cat ran away.

“It was probably because you were treating him like that, Elise-Chan. Cats don’t like that. It makes them scared,” Chuuya tried to explain as gently as possible. Getting on Elise’s bad side meant being on the boss’ bad side.

“But I was just playing! They should know that. I couldn’t do any actual harm,” she huffed. Chuuya basked in the irony of that statement considering she was an ability specifically used for violence. “We gave him everything he could ever want. He shouldn’t have run.”

Chuuya was sure the cat was given a luxurious lifestyle but he couldn’t imagine it being a happy life with Elise constantly wanting to torment him. He had never seen Mori interact with an animal so he didn’t know what he would be like but he knew that his boss wouldn’t care about a cat getting hurt if Elise was the one hurting it. Chuuya grabbed the little girl’s hand.

“Come on. Let’s keep going,” he said as he started leading her to a sweets shop. That quickly got her attention and she was back to being happy. The talk about cats made Chuuya go back to thinking of possibly bringing the little tabby home. He had started looking at pet supplies. Cats really weren’t high maintenance so it wouldn’t be hard and he would be less lonely with the annoying cat around to bother him at home.

He was distracted by Elise trying to chase after even more stray cats. She never learned her lesson. Chuuya kept a careful eye out, searching for a familiar tabby but these were all cats he didn’t know. But he still stopped her and decided to carry her from here on out so she couldn’t go tormenting other cats.

Chapter 4 Chapter Text

Chuuya sighed in relief when he was done and looked around proudly. He was done being indecisive. His home was now filled with everything needed for a cat. A litter box, food and water bowls, a variety of cat toys, and even a large cat tree. Now he just needed to catch the little tabby when he saw it again.

He stepped outside and decided to start at the restaurant. It seemed like the cat spent a lot of time there. He would need to take it to the vet before taking it home. He couldn’t help but feel excited. He had grown very fond of the annoying little cat. He stopped when he spotted the black-striped cat. The cat spotted him and rubbed against his legs affectionately before starting to walk off. Chuuya decided to follow it. Maybe it would lead him to the tabby.

The cat didn’t seem to mind being followed. Its tail was raised, as if it was leading him. Chuuya smiled when he was led to the tabby. The tabby meowed and rubbed against his legs. Chuuya could hear its purrs. He picked it up gently, making sure to hold it correctly. It didn’t struggle until Chuuya started walking away from the black-striped cat. It started thrashing but Chuuya shushed it and stroked its fur.

“It’s okay. I’m not going to hurt you. You’ll be safer soon,” he whispered. The cat still struggled but its struggles lessened. Chuuya smiled warmly at it. He was glad he would be able to tell the cat’s gender now. As soon as they stepped into the veterinary clinic, the cat started to struggle again. Chuuya quickly explained who he was to the receptionist, as he had called in earlier. She nodded and gestured to him to go inside. The cat continued struggling but Chuuya’s grip was strong. It hissed and clawed at the vets. It was the most aggressive Chuuya had ever seen it act. They eventually had to give it something to sedate it. Chuuya felt bad as the cat’s struggles slowed and the vets were allowed to look at it. Its eyes were wide open in fear.

“If he acts like this when you bring him home, it’s best not to keep him as a pet,” one of the vets said as they examined the cat. Chuuya watched in fascination as they peeled away the bandages. He flinched as he saw some wounds. They were bloody but seemed to be mostly healed.

“No. I don’t think he will. He’s pretty passive most of the time. I think he’s just scared of so many people,” Chuuya explained. The vet hummed as they started treating the injuries. “Is he okay?”

“Yes. He has many scars. He may have gotten into a lot of fights as a street cat. Whoever put the bandages on him had a good idea,” the vet explained. Chuuya was a bit surprised by the information. The little tabby seemed to get along with other cats just fine. “He’s underweight but I think you were already aware of that.”

“Yes. I noticed every time he sat on my lap that I could feel his ribs. I’ll make sure he eats well,” Chuuya promised. The vets gave him some advice on taking care of the cat and treating his injuries. They didn’t put any new bandages on the cat but Chuuya bought some anyway. He had seen the way the cat reacted when his bandages were touched. He probably felt safer with bandages on. He paid the vet for their service and carried the still-drugged cat in his arms.

He got some weird looks from people but he couldn’t care less as he carried the cat up to his apartment. He first laid the cat down on the couch and wrapped it with bandages. He did his best to recreate where the bandages were and the pressure they had. The cat’s eyes followed him the entire time as he worked. He smiled in satisfaction when he was done. He then hummed.

“I guess you need a name,” he looked around his apartment. He hadn’t thought of one. His eyes landed on a book on his table. “Dazai. How’s that?”

The cat only blinked at him. He was slowly recovering from the drug he was given and struggled to his feet, stumbling over to Chuuya. He reached out to pet him only to get bit.

“You f*cking asshole!” He cursed. It wasn’t a deep bite but it still hurt like hell. There were two puncture marks in his hand now “Your name is Dazai now, asshole.”

Dazai only flicked his tail from side to side, his big brown eyes looking at Chuuya innocently. Chuuya rolled his eyes. He expected this kind of reaction but he had still hoped for better. He dangled a cat toy in front of Dazai and he lazily batted at it. Chuuya chuckled.

“You’re a lazy little sh*t,” he huffed. Dazai suddenly grabbed the toy aggressively, biting it hard as if to prove Chuuya wrong. Chuuya used his gravity manipulation to move the toy in unpredictable ways and make the cat fumble and fall off the couch. Dazai punished him by scratching at his leg. He laughed loudly. He started walking towards the kitchen and Dazai followed him. He showed the cat where the cat tree was and smiled as he gave it a short scratch before going back to shadowing Chuuya. He showed the kitchen and then took Dazai to his room. He showed where the litter box was and the cat gave it a curious sniff. He hoped that Dazai would learn how to use it quickly. He already knew how to train him so it should be alright. Once he was done showing Dazai around the whole apartment, he sat down on the couch and Dazai jumped on next to him. He meowed at him. Chuuya reached out to scratch him but Dazai jumped off the couch, pointedly looking away from him. “Hungry?”

He stood up and went to the food bowl. He filled it with the proper amount of food. It was time for him to make his own food too. Dazai looked at the food and turned his nose up at it. Chuuya walked into the kitchen. He started to cook some salmon for himself. Dazai was meowing and moving around his legs.

“Go eat your food, brat,” Chuuya growled. Dazai bit his leg and Chuuya cursed. “Don’t be picky. Are you saying you don’t want cat food?”

Dazai stared up at him but stopped attacking him. Chuuya sighed. This cat was going to be a handful.

“Fine. I’ll give you fish. But this won’t continue happening. Don’t get used to it,” Chuuya knew that he was lying. He was weak to the cat. Dazai purred and sweetly rubbed against his legs. “So now you’re all sweet only after getting what you want.”

Chuuya was being ridiculous. He knew that. Dazai didn’t know what he was saying. But it really felt like he could. Chuuya finished cooking the salmon and looked up how much salmon a cat should eat. He portioned it to give Dazai the right amount and he immediately started eating.

“You’re a spoiled brat. I was expecting a street cat to be a bit more grateful,” he huffed as he watched the cat eagerly eat all of it. He started eating his own food as he watched. It would be a lot more responsibility but Chuuya already felt some of the lonely hole in his heart be filled just by watching the cat. He wasn’t alone in this big apartment anymore. The space was now filled with cat toys and cat supplies. He stroked Dazai’s back and he didn’t snap at him. He finished his own food and watched Dazai lick his whiskers clean. He picked up the plates and washed them in the sink while Dazai stood on the counter.

Kouyou would probably scold him for allowing a cat on the counter but he didn’t care. He scratched Dazai behind the ears and he purred and leaned into the touch. Chuuya admired his markings. He truly was a beautiful cat with his deep brown fur. The white bandages clearly stood out amongst his fur.

“You were a little fighter?” He asked even though he would get no response. Dazai looked at him with a tilted head. He scratched near the bandages and the cat started to growl again. “I saw what was under. I didn’t expect you to get into fights. You didn’t fight with any of the cats I saw.”

Dazai hissed at him. It was a strange shift from the mood before. The cat jumped onto the ground and went trotting away. Chuuya watched him climb the cat tree, scratching aggressively at it. Chuuya leaned against the counter and watched. It was getting late. He walked into his bedroom and to start getting ready for bed and smiled when he saw Dazai follow him. After he got changed and laid down on his bed, Dazai settled in the curve of his arm.

Chapter 5 Chapter Text

Chuuya woke up feeling warm. His eyes slowly peeled open and he smiled when he saw why he was so warm. Dazai was still asleep against him. The cat had moved to sleep against his stomach. Chuuya fondly watched Dazai’s belly rise and fall as he slept. He looked so cute. He would need to get up soon but for now, he was content to just lay in bed with Dazai. He reached out and petted behind his ears. Dazai raised his head with a small meow as he was woken up. He looked like he was glaring at Chuuya for a moment before he started pushing his head into the man’s hand. Chuuya chuckled and got up off the bed. Dazai jumped off as well, following Chuuya into the kitchen.

“I can’t believe I bought cat food only for you to be a spoiled brat and only want to eat human food,” Chuuya huffed. Dazai hissed at him as if demanding him to make his food. Chuuya shook his head in exasperation but still started getting breakfast ready. Dazai sat on the counter, watching everything he did with keen eyes. Chuuya prided himself on being a good cook so it made him happy to be able to serve someone, even if it was just a spoiled cat. He finished cooking the tuna and put it on a plate. Dazai immediately started eating. Chuuya smiled and ran his fingers through Dazai’s fur as he ate. The bandages were rough in comparison to the soft fur. “I have to go to work soon. You’ll have to be good here. There’s plenty of toys for you to entertain yourself with.”

Dazai continued eating but his eyes were on Chuuya and his ears were pricked. Chuuya quickly made his own food and ate it beside Dazai. Dazai licked his own plate clean and followed Chuuya when he went into his room. Chuuya went into the bathroom and closed the door. He already had his clothes set out and ready for him. As soon as the door was closed, there was scratching and then meowing. Eventually, a paw stuck under the door, trying to pry it open. Chuuya sighed and shook his head, opening the door to let Dazai in. He felt awkward stripping in front of the cat but it didn’t matter. Dazai was a cat. He got undressed and stepped into the shower. Dazai was sitting outside of the shower, looking up at him through the glass door. Chuuya hummed as he washed himself. It felt odd knowing he had someone watching him but he would be more annoyed if Dazai was constantly meowing beyond the door. He didn’t expect a stray cat to become clingy so quickly. Chuuya finished showering and wrapped a towel around his waist as he stepped out to dry. Dazai jumped on the counter as Chuuya started blow-drying his hair. Chuuya could hear his faint purrs. It was a pleasant sound. Once his hair was dry, Chuuya got dressed. Dazai followed him out of the bathroom and Chuuya looked down at him sadly as he put his shoes on.

“I gotta go for now, buddy. I’ll be home soon. Be good,” he gave Dazai a few pets before he stepped out of the door and closed it, locking it. He just hoped Dazai wouldn’t spend the whole day crying at the door. It would break his heart if he came home to Dazai still crying because he was gone.

______________________

After a long day, Chuuya finally returned home. He pressed his ear to the door and was relieved to not hear any distressed meowing. He unlocked the door and stepped inside. Immediately, the sound of paws scrambling on the floor came and Dazai came shooting towards him. Chuuya crouched down to pet him while Dazai meowed incessantly at him. He felt like he was being scolded. Dazai lifted his back as Chuuya scratched it. The cat eventually bit him and he pulled his hand back in shock.

“Alright I guess I deserve that for leaving you,” he chuckled. Dazai hadn’t bitten hard enough to break the skin which was all he cared about. He stood up and walked further into his home and sighed at what he saw.

His couch was completely destroyed. It was covered in scores of claw marks. Chuuya crossed his arms and looked down at Dazai disapprovingly. Dazai responded by cutely twirling around his legs, purring loudly. Chuuya couldn’t find it in himself to be furious with the cat. But he was still mad. He picked up Dazai and placed him on the cat tree. He grabbed Dazai’s paws and made them scratch against the correct places.

“This is where you scratch, you asshole,” Chuuya growled. Dazai nipped his hand so he let go. He sighed as he looked at the couch. Stuffing was strewn around the whole apartment and he was sure Dazai was having the time of his life running around spreading it. Dazai was still looking at him with those big brown eyes, the picture of innocence. He looked around the house for any more damage but luckily, that seemed to be all of it. Dazai just had a lot of anger for that couch apparently.

He sighed as he used for the tainted sorrow to lift the couch and left his apartment with the couch trailing in the air. Luckily, there was a large dumpster close to the apartment complex. He put the couch there and sighed as he got ready to go back up the stairs. Before he could, there was a batting at his leg. He looked down and saw the black-striped cat. It was meowing at him incessantly.

“Are you looking for your friend?” He crouched and asked, knowing he wouldn’t get an answer. But the cat seemed to respond, as it jumped in place, moving its head in a nodding motion. He motioned for the cat to follow him and led it to the penthouse. It kept meowing on the way. He opened the door and let the cat inside. The cat immediately darted to where Dazai was and started to rub against him and lick him. Chuuya smiled. It was an adorable scene but he had enough trouble with one cat and he knew he couldn’t adopt this one too. Not to mention the fact that he suspected this cat was a pet since it looked well taken care of.

Dazai was purring loudly as he groomed his friend. Chuuya walked into the kitchen and Dazai followed, his friend following. He looked down at the two cats with a smile.

“How about I give you two some food?” He asked. Dazai and his friend jumped onto the counter and sat down. Chuuya chuckled and got to work grilling some fish. He did a quick search online and found that cats could eat crab meat as well so he decided to get some of that too. As soon as the crab meat came out, Dazai started sniffing the air with interest. Chuuya offered a bit of the crab meat and Dazai immediately ate it, purring loudly. He chuckled. Looks like he found his cat’s favorite food.

He put the fish and crab meat on a plate and offered it to the two cats. Dazai’s friend didn’t eat much, only picking at the parts it liked. Dazai devoured all of the crab first. Once Dazai finished eating most of it, he purred and rubbed against his friend again.

“I wonder if I should give you a nickname since you may come around often,” Chuuya pondered. The cat was friendly and still allowed him to pet it. “Your owner must spoil you. You seem well fed.”

Chuuya was still debating on whether he would allow Dazai to go outside and roam or not. He was worried about Dazai not finding his way home. He also liked the idea of Dazai always being home waiting for him. The black and white cat walked around Dazai multiple times as if checking if he was okay before walking to the door.

“Gotta go home?” Chuuya asked even though he knew he wouldn’t get an answer. He opened the door and the cat walked away, looking happy with its tail in the air. Chuuya closed the door and walked into his bedroom. He usually would be relaxing on the couch but that wasn’t an option anymore. Dazai followed close behind and jumped into bed with him. As soon as he set his hat down, Dazai grabbed it and started kicking it with his back legs. “You f*cking dick!”

Chuuya had to wrestle the hat out of Dazai’s grip while also being careful not to destroy it. Eventually, he managed to get it back. He set it in his closet and closed the door so Dazai couldn’t get in. When he lay on his bed, Dazai hopped onto his chest. Chuuya was tempted to push him off after all the trouble he caused but he didn’t have the heart to.

Chapter 6 Chapter Text

Chuuya stretched his arms above him as he lounged. Dazai was lying at his side, pressed against him. Chuuya was dreading work later so he was basking in the time he had now. He ran his fingers through Dazai’s fur and the cat purred loudly, occasionally giving him a bite when he lingered too long. Dazai had easily settled into his home and it felt nice. His home felt more complete now. The empty spaces were now filled with cat toys and cat supplies.

“I’m not looking forward to work. I have a meeting. They’re always so boring. I prefer going on missions,” Chuuya sighed. Dazai raised his head, showing that he was listening. Chuuya smiled and scratched him behind the ears, making him lean into the touch. “At least Ane-San will be there.”

Dazai tilted his head and Chuuya chuckled. It truly felt like Dazai could understand. He scratched down Dazai’s back, laughing at how his body bent to follow the scratches.

“She’s not my actual sister. But she may as well be. She acts like a mentor to me. She really cares about me,” Chuuya explained. Chuuya rubbed against the bandages. “Should I replace these? Don’t they get uncomfortable?”

Dazai responded by lightly biting his arm. Chuuya laughed out loud. He couldn’t remember the last time he laughed so much. He removed his hand from the bandages and scrolled on his phone, only for Dazai to headbutt the phone out of his hands.

“Hey!” He exclaimed but Dazai didn’t seem to care as he lay on Chuuya’s chest, close to his face. Chuuya rolled his eyes and went back to petting him. Dazai purred loudly and Chuuya smiled. He felt loved and cared for with the cat by his side. He wished he could have a proper conversation with him. “You’re super cute but you’re also such a f*cking asshole.”

Dazai growled softly and Chuuya chuckled. The cat’s big brown eyes were looking right at him.

“I’ve never seen a cat with brown eyes like yours. They’re pretty. I’m used to seeing cats with green eyes,” Chuuya smiled. Dazai purred and nudged against his hand, demanding more pets. Chuuya gave him what he wanted. “I’m spoiling you way too much.”

Chuuya’s alarm went off, making Dazai jump into the air in shock. Chuuya sighed as he took it off. That meant he had to get ready for work. He struggled out of bed and walked to the bathroom. He already had his clothes set out, he just needed to shower. Dazai followed him in, as usual. Chuuya stepped into the hot shower. He always had his showers scalding hot, as it reminded him he was human. He could feel the pain of the heat. He was human.

“It must be boring for you out there. Why do you stay here the entire time I shower?” Chuuya called out. Dazai could only see the blurry figure of Chuuya through the shower door, after all. Dazai meowed as if he was responding. Chuuya laughed to himself. He needed to stop pretending that Dazai could understand him. Once he was done with his shower, he got dressed with Dazai walking between his legs. The cat stood on the counter as Chuuya blow-dried his hair. Chuuya was tempted to teach Dazai some tricks but, knowing the cat, he would probably only bite him. He sighed once he was fully ready. That means he has to go to work. He picked Dazai up and carried him to the cat tree, setting him down. “This is where you scratch when I’m gone.”

Chuuya stepped out of his penthouse with another sigh. He trudged his way to work. After the meeting, he had a short mission to go on. Taking care of a gang that had popped up. It would only take him a few minutes to finish.

When he stepped into the meeting room, he was the first one there other than Mori. The man waved at him. Every action of the man puts Chuuya on edge. He was always scheming something. He gave a polite bow to his boss. Elise was there, as usual. She ran to him and tugged on his sleeve.

“Chuuya-Onii!” She exclaimed. Chuuya didn’t know what he did to make the ability so fond of him. She tugged him over to where she was drawing something. Chuuya could barely make out what it was but it looked like a cat. He was saved from Elise by Kouyou’s arrival. The elegant woman was always good with kids, which included Elise so the little girl latched onto her instead. Soon after Kouyou arrived, Mori sat them down, explaining to them the details of an investigation he conducted.

“In conclusion, you need to be wary of everything and everyone. I trust you two to dispose of anyone suspicious,” Mori finished his long speech. Chuuya was tapping his gloved finger on the table.

“What made you start this investigation in the first place?” He asked. Mori had his usual smile on his face. Chuuya felt like there was more going on that he wasn’t saying.

“Some personal circ*mstances. Nothing to concern you. It has to do with the loss of our cat,” Mori explained with a shrug. Chuuya didn’t see how a cat running away had anything to do with potential spies but whatever. He could never expect a straight answer from his boss. Kouyou asked a few questions and then they were dismissed. Before Chuuya could head off to his mission, Kouyou put a hand on his shoulder.

“How is taking care of the cat?” She asked. Chuuya smiled and she smiled too. He knew that he was showing signs of being happier since Dazai had entered his life so he knew Kouyou noticed.

“He’s a little sh*t. Destroyed my couch the last time I went to work. I had to order a new one. I’m still waiting for it to arrive. He’s very clingy but it’s cute. He’s a very pretty cat. You should come over to meet him,” Chuuya suggested. Kouyou scrunched her face and shook her head.

“I can’t stand cat hair. Seeing you so happy is enough for me. Make sure you take care of it,” Kouyou said, kindly. Chuuya nodded. She gave him one more pat on the shoulder before walking away. Chuuya hurried to meet up with Tachihara. In his hurry, he smacked straight into Akutagawa. The younger man groaned and coughed. Chuuya quickly apologized and helped the man to stand, stabilizing him as he coughed.

“Sorry about that, Akutagawa. Are you okay?” He asked. The man coughed for a minute before finally settling.

“I am fine, Chuuya-San. Thank you for the concern,” Akutagawa whispered. Chuuya nodded. Usually, the young man wouldn’t even respond, he would simply walk away. Chuuya had noticed him changing a bit recently. He also seemed happier. Chuuya muttered a quick goodbye before hurrying away. He would have to speak to Akutagawa another time to know the reason behind his change. The younger man was known to be reclusive. The only ones he ever talked to were his sister, his subordinate, and the boss when he was called.

Chuuya met up with Tachihara, who clapped him on the back upon seeing him. If there was a person Chuuya would consider a friend other than Kouyou, it would be him.

“How you doing, man?” Tachihara asked with his usual smile. Chuuya smiled back for once. Tachihara was used to seeing his scowl so he immediately took notice. “Going good, huh? Did something good happen? Meet a guy?”

“No. I adopted a cat. He’s been keeping me company,” Chuuya explained. Tachihara laughed out loud and Chuuya scowled at him.

“Sorry! Sorry, I don’t mean to laugh! It’s great that you’re happier. I just expected something bigger I guess,” the younger man got over his laughing fit. Chuuya chuckled a bit too. The more he thought about it, the more ridiculous it seemed considering how big of an impact the little cat had on him in such a short period of time.

“I trust you’ll have my back?” Chuuya asked. Tachihara nodded as he grabbed both his guns. He dramatically pointed them and Chuuya rolled his eyes as he led Tachihara to his motorcycle.

____________________

By the time the mission was over, Chuuya was exhausted but luckily not injured. He was ready to be home and cuddle with Dazai. He stopped in front of his door as an idea formed in his head. He grinned as he used his ability to float and open the door soundlessly. He was going to surprise Dazai. He soundlessly closed the door and looked around. He was successful since the little cat didn’t come barreling at him. He first looked around for any sign of destruction but luckily found none. He kept floating as he looked around his living area. He looked everywhere until the only space left was his room. The door was open so he floated to it but immediately stopped.

Sitting on his bed was a man. A naked man covered in bandages. Chuuya couldn’t see his face because he was looking away. But the first thing Chuuya noticed were the cat ears coming from his head and the tail that was swishing back and forth. He was in complete shock as he stared. Where was Dazai? Did this man do something to him?

Chapter 7 Chapter Text

The utter shock made Chuuya accidentally let go of his ability. The sound of his feet hitting the floor sounded like a bomb went off in the quiet of the penthouse. The man on the bed immediately whipped his head around, brown eyes wide with fear. Chuuya immediately grabbed his dagger. Mori had just warned him about spies. This man was probably one of them. There was a burst of smoke and then Chuuya saw a shape dart under the bed. A small… Cat. Chuuya’s brain ground to a halt. He couldn’t keep up with what was happening. When the smoke cleared, the man was gone. Chuuya’s brain scrambled to piece together all the information. After the smoke, Dazai darted under the bed but he wasn’t on the bed before and now the man was gone. Was his f*cking cat an ability user this whole time?

“Dazai?” He cautiously called out as he got on the floor to look under the bed. Sure enough, the cat was Dazai. Chuuya saw he was shivering. He immediately felt guilty but pushed the emotion away. Dazai was the one who was keeping things from him. He deserved to be scared. Chuuya put his dagger back in the holster on his thigh. “Hey, Dazai. Or I guess that isn’t your name, huh?”

The cat stared at him. He was still shaking. Chuuya sighed. He was used to Dazai being vocal and annoying. It felt wrong to have him be so passive and scared. But Chuuya didn’t know what to do. He felt betrayed. This whole time, his cat was an ability user. That was the only explanation. He sighed as he looked at the shivering bundle of fur. Why couldn’t anything be simple for him? He couldn’t even have a cat? Exhaustion weighed on him but he knew he wouldn’t be able to sleep until he got some answers. But he needed Dazai to get out from under the bed and change into a human.

“Dazai, come out. I’m not mad. I just want to talk,” he said. His mind immediately remembered all the times he felt like Dazai was listening to him. It’s because he was. He always was. Dazai was still curled up, not moving at all. Chuuya sighed and sat up. “I’m not going to hurt you. Have you been hurt by people finding this out before? I promise I won’t hurt you.”

Chuuya heard a soft meow from under the bed. He smiled as Dazai crawled out. He scratched him behind the ears, showing he wasn’t mad. Dazai flinched at first before accepting the affection. Chuuya scratched down his body and Dazai let out a cautious purr. Dazai looked up at him with those big brown eyes and Chuuya smiled. He looked adorable.

“It’s okay. You’re safe,” Chuuya whispered. Dazai was still shaking slightly. Part of Chuuya wanted to insist that the cat turn into a human but he also didn’t want to stress him out. Demanding Dazai to do what he wants would only make him more scared. Dazai head-butted his hand when he stopped petting. Chuuya chuckled and resumed his actions. It felt good to act like he didn’t just have an earth-shattering revelation and pretend Dazai was just a normal cat. But they needed to talk. He needed answers. “Can you change into a human so we can talk?”

Dazai looked up at him and Chuuya could see the fear in his eyes. Chuuya scratched behind his ears again. Dazai must have gotten hurt before because of this secret. Dazai purred a bit and then there was another flash of smoke.

When the smoke cleared, Chuuya saw the man. He took the time to actually analyze him this time. He had wavy brown hair with cat ears. He was covered in bandages. They started around his neck and covered his whole chest and arms. Chuuya blushed when he looked further down. He coughed as he grabbed a blanket and offered it to Dazai. Dazai grabbed it and wrapped it around himself, covering his nude body. His tail was swishing behind him. His brown eyes were looking at Chuuya and every time he moved even slightly, Dazai’s eyes caught it. Chuuya knew the look of someone who was waiting to be hurt. Dazai was preparing himself for violence. Chuuya did his best to stay as still as possible as he sat down next to Dazai. Or, the person he called Dazai.

“It’s okay. I told you, I won’t hurt you,” he reassured Dazai again. Dazai still didn’t relax. Chuuya knew that if he was in his cat form, his fur would be on end. Chuuya took a moment to admire the man in front of him. He was pretty. Chuuya was staring but he couldn’t help himself. He admired the man’s sharp cheekbones and jawline and his soft, fluffy hair. The ears on the top of his head made him look adorable. He only stopped staring when Dazai pulled the blanket tighter around himself while looking uncomfortable. “S-Sorry.”

“It’s okay. Just… Please don’t touch me,” Dazai whispered. Chuuya nodded. Dazai’s eyes widened. “Y-You’re not going to insist?”

“Why should I? I have no reason to touch you if you tell me you don’t want me to,” Chuuya shrugged. The look of surprise on Dazai’s face made an awful feeling settle in Chuuya’s gut. “So, what’s your name?”

“It’s Dazai. You’re the one who named me,” Dazai responded as if it were obvious. Chuuya sighed and shook his head.

“You had a name before I named you, right? I named you because I assumed you were just a normal cat,” Chuuya responded. Dazai tilted his head, his tail moving in the air.

“I could have had a name before you named me even if I was a normal cat so why does me not being a cat change things?” Dazai asked. Chuuya sighed. Dazai was making it very clear that he wasn’t going to say his name.

“Fine. I’ll just call you Dazai,” he shrugged. It wasn’t a big deal. It just meant that he wouldn’t be able to do a search for Dazai's name like he was planning on doing. “So, you’re an ability user?”

Dazai shook his head no and Chuuya immediately lifted an eyebrow. Dazai sighed like it was the hardest thing he had to do.

“I’m not an ability user. I’m a Bakeneko,” Dazai explained. Chuuya huffed and shook his head.

“Bakeneko are just a legend. You can just tell me you’re an ability user,” Chuuya sighed. Dazai growled and his tail fluffed up angrily.

“I’m being serious! I’m not the only one of my kind! There are plenty of us! Most of us just spend time in our cat forms because people don’t react kindly to someone walking around with cat ears and a tail,” Dazai hissed. Chuuya put his hands up. He still didn’t fully believe it but he might as well listen.

Bakeneko were creatures said to be cats that gained spiritual power after living long enough. Some of their abilities were said to be shapeshifting and cursing humans. His curiosity peaked.

“So, is it true that you become like that after living long enough? What about killing and cursing humans who hurt cats?” Chuuya asked. Dazai chuckled a bit and shook his head.

“No. We are born the way we are. I was born here in Yokohama. As for cursing humans, I wish. If I had that ability it would be perfect,” Dazai growled, his fist clenching. Chuuya noticed that his nails were long like claws. Blood dripped from Dazai’s hands as he dug his nails into his palms from the force he was squeezing his fists. Chuuya’s first instinct was to reach out and unfurl the hand but Dazai told him not to touch so he wouldn’t.

“So, humans have hurt you?” Chuuya asked. Dazai nodded. Chuuya heard a faint growling coming from Dazai. His tail was lashing violently. “So, what about Nekomata? Are they real?”

Nekomata were creatures that were often mistaken for Bakeneko, the main difference being that Nekomata have two tails. Dazai shrugged.

“I’m not sure. I haven’t come across anyone with two tails. But then again, I’m sure anyone with two tails would know not to be near humans. Your kind is very dangerous to us,” Dazai said. Chuuya nodded slowly, thinking of how Elise so easily hurt cats.

“Were you planning on just living with me forever and not telling me what you are?” Chuuya couldn’t help but ask. He still felt betrayed. Dazai shook his head.

“You’re smart. You would figure it out eventually. I never doubted that. I just wanted to live like this for as long as I could. You’ll be kicking me out now, right?” Dazai asked. His ears drooped and his tail was flat on the ground. Chuuya shook his head. Even though he wished Dazai had told him sooner, he wasn’t ready to be alone again.

“Why should I? You’re the same asshole cat I adopted. I can just talk to you now. I think that’s better, to be honest,” Chuuya admitted, at the risk of revealing how painfully lonely he was. Dazai looked up at him with wide eyes. Shock was clear in them. He then backed away a bit.

“What do you want in return?” Dazai asked defensively, wrapping the blanket around him tighter. Chuuya shook his head. They were both cautious bastards. Maybe this was perfect.

“I’m not expecting anything except your company. Is that too much?” He asked.

Chapter 8 Chapter Text

“Just tell me what you want from me,” Dazai growled. Chuuya shook his head. This was going to be an uphill battle.

“There’s nothing I could want from you. What do you even have to offer?” Chuuya growled. His temper was flaring. He didn’t like people accusing him of lying. Dazai’s growling slowly subsided and his brown eyes looked softer.

“Y… You’re being honest?” He asked. Chuuya nodded. He tried to look as nonthreatening as possible. Whatever Dazai went through, it must have been horrible. Chuuya knew the signs of someone who was abused. Dazai flinched at every fast movement Chuuya made and was examining his every move. “Y-You don’t want my body? You don’t want to hurt me?”

“Yes. I’m being honest. I’m not going to hurt you and I don’t want your body. I don’t have any clothes your size so… Stay here for a bit. I’ll be right back,” Chuuya stood up. Dazai nodded, pulling the blanket closer around himself. Chuuya put his shoes back on and headed to his favorite store.

He picked out a lot of clothes for the man that he thought would look good on him. He felt a bit like Elise picking the clothes for her dolls. When he bought the clothes, the cashier looked at him with a raised brow, as if asking if he was sure he could fit in them. He practically ran back to his penthouse. A part of him was scared Dazai would have left. He didn’t want that. He breathed a sigh of relief when he went to his room and found the man still wrapped in the blanket. He placed the multiple bags on the bed.

“Here. Clothes. I’ll leave so you can get changed,” Chuuya said briskly before leaving the room. A part of him wanted to see the man naked again. But he wouldn’t violate his privacy. He already was walking a tightrope in trying not to scare him. He didn’t want to lose the only company he had. Dazai was still his annoying cat. He was just… More now. Chuuya heard rustling from the room. He hoped Dazai liked the clothes he picked. He tapped his foot against the ground impatiently. The door opened and Chuuya looked him up and down. Dazai’s ears were twitching.

“M-My tail is…” Dazai whispered. Chuuya cursed himself. He didn’t even think about that. He went into the kitchen and got a pair of scissors. When Dazai saw the scissors, his eyes widened in fear and he put his hands up as if to guard himself.

“It’s okay! I’m just going to cut holes in your clothes for your tail,” Chuuya reassured him. Dazai didn’t completely relax but he nodded. Chuuya got behind Dazai and started feeling up his backside until he found his tail. He blushed. He couldn’t believe he was touching him so intimately. He found the spot where his tail emerged and cut a hole in the pants there. He grabbed the tail and helped it in through the hole. Dazai sighed in relief. “Is that better?”

Dazai nodded. His tail flicked around and Chuuya chuckled as it hit his face multiple times. He stood up and looked at the rest of the clothes. He would need to cut holes in all the pants. He sighed. He would do it later.

“How will I repay you?” Dazai asked. Chuuya sighed. How many times did he have to explain to him?

“What happens if you turn into your cat form right now?” Chuuya asked out of curiosity. Anything else was better than trying to explain he didn’t want anything again. There was a burst of smoke and when the smoke cleared, Chuuya looked down to see a cat in a pile of clothes. He laughed out loud at the sight. Dazai responded by lightly clawing his leg. He turned around so Dazai could turn back and get dressed. When Dazai was dressed again, Chuuya turned around and looked up at him. Looked… Up. He sighed. Of course, even his cat would be taller than him. Dazai immediately caught on, smirking mischievously. He leaned against Chuuya, accentuating their height difference.

“My owner is a little chibi,” he whispered. Chuuya immediately punched him in the side, making Dazai groan in pain and fall to the ground dramatically. Chuuya rolled his eyes.

“I didn’t punch you that hard. Get up,” Chuuya growled. Dazai rolled around on the floor, making loud whining noises as he did.

“The chibi hurt me!” He yelled. Chuuya rolled his eyes again. He was doing a lot of that now. He grabbed Dazai and forced him to his feet. Dazai whined and squirmed.

“My owner is so mean to me. I’m being abused!” He cried out. Chuuya put his hands on his hips, narrowing his eyes at the other. Dazai had the back of his hand pressed to his forehead, imitating a dying maiden in an old painting.

“So, why were you a stray? Why not live in an area without humans?” Chuuya asked the question in his mind. Dazai raised an eyebrow, looking at Chuuya as if he were the stupidest person ever. Chuuya felt the urge to punch that smug face.

“Your kind has spread through the world like a plague. Finding a place with no humans is practically impossible,” Dazai sighed. His tail was lashing back and forth. “Plus, it’s easy to get food off of humans. You are all so weak to anything cute.”

“So, that’s your true motive,” Chuuya huffed. He hated that he played right into Dazai’s hands. “So, what’s your traumatic past?”

“You don’t get to have that yet. You have to earn it by earning my trust,” Dazai leaned against Chuuya, almost toppling the shorter man over. Chuuya used his ability to toot himself in place, not allowing the other to win. “But, I’ve been on the run.”

“On the run? From what?” Chuuya asked. Dazai tsked.

“Uh uh. You don’t get that yet,” he whispered in Chuuya’s ear. Chuuya grabbed one of his ears, making him yelp.

“I need to know because you could be a danger to me. At least tell me if you could possibly bring anything here,” he snarled. Dazai whined and Chuuya let go of his ear. He growled softly as he looked at Chuuya.

“Even if I was dangerous to you, why would I tell you that?” He growled. Chuuya picked him up and started heading towards the door. Dazai immediately squirmed out of his grip. “Okay okay! I’m not dangerous. At least, I won’t be as long as no one knows I’m here. So don’t tell anyone about what I am.”

“As if I would in the first place. Everyone would think I was crazy if I did,” Chuuya rolled his eyes as he leaned against the wall. Dazai’s tail flicked from side to side and Chuuya looked at it. “So, you can’t hide your ears or tail?”

“Nope. I’ve tried plenty of times. Life would be a lot easier if I could,” Dazai wrapped his long arms around Chuuya. It pissed him off that his cat was taller than him. Dazai nuzzled against his neck. “You liked it so much when I did this as a cat.”

“Well, you’re not a cat anymore so get off,” Chuuya snarled. Dazai pouted and only nuzzled more.

“I can be. I can change into a cat right now. So I should be allowed,” Dazai whispered. His breath puffed against Chuuya’s neck and made him blush. He swatted the other’s hands away and Dazai looked like a kicked puppy. Or a kicked kitten I guess.

“You really are the cat I picked up. Just as much of an asshole,” Chuuya huffed. “So, that black-striped cat. Was it also a Bakeneko?”

“I’m surprised Chibi’s little brain caught up so quickly. It must be rather small considering your size,” Dazai said and immediately had to dodge Chuuya’s punch. Dazai was agile, as expected of a cat. “But yes. That was Atsushi-Kun. He’s like me. He’s also living with a human.”

“Is that where you got the idea to cozy up to me?” Chuuya crossed his arms. The idea made him sad and he didn’t want it to be true. Dazai shrugged.

“Not really. I was hungry when I first met you. That’s all it was. Plus, I knew it was dangerous for a human to adopt me. They would eventually find out. I never wanted to be taken by a human again,” Dazai shivered a bit. Chuuya immediately caught onto the word choice. Again. So he used to belong to someone. Something must have gone wrong when they found out what he was. “A lot of the cats around town know to be around that restaurant if they spot you. You’re always throwing food at us.”

“I’m not heartless. I don’t want to see a bunch of hungry cats while I’m eating just fine next to them,” Chuuya blushed and crossed his arms. This was totally ruining his rough mafia executive reputation damn it. Dazai giggled a bit.

Chapter 9 Chapter Text

Chuuya sighed in relief when he opened the door. It was another long day, but at least he got to get a drink with Kouyou at the end. He called Dazai’s name but no cat came running to him. He smiled a bit to himself. Dazai was more comfortable being in his human form now, which made Chuuya happy. He took off his shoes and walked through the house. When he got to his bedroom, he stopped and leaned against the doorframe.

Dazai was in his bed, asleep. He had wrapped the blankets all around himself, making him look like he was tucked in a little cocoon. He could only see Dazai’s eyes and ears poking out of the blanket. Chuuya felt a bit of happiness stir within him when he realized Dazai felt safe enough to sleep peacefully. Part of him wanted to shove the man off the bed as revenge for all the mischief he caused but he fought off that thought. He felt a bit of the tension from the day leaving him as he watched the steady rise and fall of the blanket as Dazai breathed. He looked cute.

Chuuya immediately blushed and tried to make that thought go away. Dazai was NOT cute. Not at all. He was annoying and a little bastard who always tried to mess with him. It was just because of his cat ears. That was it. It wasn’t his fluffy brown hair or his big chocolate eyes or

Chuuya shook his head. He wanted to slap himself. Why was he having these thoughts? It made no sense. As if he could sense Chuuya’s turmoil, Dazai started moving in his cocoon. Eyes slowly opened, still blurry from sleep. He stretched, the blankets falling away from his body. Chuuya swallowed heavily as his eyes immediately were drawn down the long length of the man’s body. All of the affection he felt immediately vanished when a sly smirk appeared on Dazai’s face. His tail raised in the air, flicking from side to side mischievously.

“Was the chibi watching me sleep?” His voice was teasing and mocking. Chuuya growled low in his throat, clenching his fists. He crossed his arms while glaring at the brunette.

“Hell no. I just got here to see you sleeping in MY bed and hogging all the blankets,” he huffed. Dazai nodded in a condescending way, showing that he didn’t believe a word Chuuya said. “Why are you so f*cking annoying?”

“Why are you so short?” Dazai dodged the hat thrown at him and only giggled. “About time you got rid of that hideous hat.”

“It’s not hideous! Shut up!” Chuuya yelled. He used his ability to bring his hat back to him, clutching it close as if the man would try and take it to destroy it. Dazai giggled. His movements were slow and sluggish as he was still waking up from sleep. He stretched his arms above his head with an exaggerated yawn that sounded more like a moan. Chuuya blushed and looked away. He didn’t like the images that noise put in his mind. Dazai immediately noticed the reaction and sprang on it, making another moaning noise.

“Ah~ Chibi~,” Dazai’s voice was dripping with seduction and Chuuya gripped his hat so hard he was worried it would break somehow. Dazai laid back in the bed, showing off his long body, his legs spread.

“Stop it,” Chuuya growled. Dazai didn’t listen and continued to moan. Chuuya ignored him as he went into the bathroom to change into comfortable clothes. He could hear Dazai moaning from the other side of the door. He hated how easy it was for Dazai to tease him. He looked down at the growing bulge in his pants. He really needed to get laid if that noise from the bastard was all it took to get him hard. He hated how attractive the other was. He just had to calm down. He focused all of his attention on getting changed and thankfully his arousal went away. He stayed in the bathroom for longer than was necessary, knowing that the cat was on the other side, waiting to tease him more.

“Chibiiiii~ Don’t just leave me out here!” Dazai’s voice called through the door. He sounded so annoying but Chuuya definitely preferred the bratty tone over the moaning. He sighed and leaned against the door. He didn’t know whether he preferred being lonely all the time or the torment by the cat. He opened the door and almost slammed Dazai in the face. Dazai stumbled away while looking extremely offended.

“You deserve it, you asshole,” Chuuya growled as he walked off to the kitchen. He was starving. He heard the sound of footsteps behind him and sighed. Of course, Dazai would follow him. He got out the things he needed to make Nikujaga. Dazai stood awkwardly just outside of the kitchen, his tail flicking from side to side. “I’m guessing you want some too?”

“Obviously,” Dazai rolled his eyes as if Chuuya was the dumbest person in the world. Chuuya gently slapped him over the head and he turned into his cat form to look particularly pathetic, curling up in a ball and shaking as if he were terrified.

“I should have you make your own food now that I know you can,” Chuuya crossed his arms. Dazai turned back into his human form. Chuuya hated how the bastard looked down at him in that form.

“If you want a burnt-down kitchen then sure!” His voice was cheery and Chuuya scoffed and turned around. He had enough for two anyway. He felt Dazai’s keen eyes on him as he cooked. Every time he turned around, his eyes caught Dazai. It felt odd to have someone looking at him in his home. Before, it was him and a cat and it was normal but now he had a person. As he cooked the meat, his mind went back over the last few days. His brain landed on the words of his boss. A spy. Someone trying to sneak into his life. Anyone new. Be suspicious.

“Hey, so have you lived in a group before?” Chuuya reached for a way to get to the topic. Dazai tilted his head, one of his ears twitching.

“I lived amongst a lot of stray cats I guess. But we weren’t really a collective. Why?” Dazai asked. Chuuya shook his head. It was probably just a coincidence. But the thought would leave his mouth. He put the food onto two plates and served it to Dazai. He ate slowly, picking at his food and Chuuya tilted his head.

“Is it not good?” He asked. He took a bite but it tasted good. Maybe it wasn’t to the other’s taste? Dazai shrugged.

“I don’t eat much. When I first came here, I was starved. Now, I can eat how I want so I don’t need as much,” he explained. Chuuya raised an eyebrow as he looked the other man up and down. To him, Dazai still looked painfully skinny. He was sure that if Dazai were without his shirt, he could see his ribs. He shook that thought out of his mind, his face becoming red. Why was he thinking of Dazai like that? That infuriating grin spread across Dazai’s face again as he saw how red Chuuya was getting. He leaned forward so he was close and whispered. “What are you thinking about that’s got you so red, Chuuya?”

Chuuya flinched away, Dazai’s warm breath against his ear making him shiver. He felt like he was going crazy. Was he really this pent-up? Just looking at Dazai was bringing those thoughts to his mind. The man’s long eyelashes, the fluffy hair, and the ears on the top of his head all made Chuuya feel a burning in his stomach. He tried to convince himself it was anger. Dazai giggled a bit, his chin resting on one of his hands.

“But no. If you’re asking if I’m a member of any sort of organization, I'm not. I’ve been distrustful of humans my entire life. My kind don’t make organizations. It seems to be a very human thing,” Dazai’s voice was full of disdain as he talked about humans. Chuuya felt a bit of defensiveness rise up.

“I’m human. Stop acting like we’re all the same,” Chuuya growled. His doubts about his own humanity started to grow in his mind but he still would defend humans. It’s what he was, he kept telling himself. Dazai looked up at him with those big, innocent brown eyes.

“I never would have guessed. But you are all the same. It would only take a little bit to make you crack as well, Chuuya. That’s something I’ve come to accept. Eventually, you will discard me, perhaps hurting me on the way,” Dazai’s voice was filled with resignation. Chuuya pushed his anger down to the best of his ability. Getting angry would only prove Dazai’s point. He sighed.

He wanted a cat and now he had a roommate. One that was endlessly annoying.

Chapter 10 Chapter Text

Dazai stretched out on the bed. He could hear Chuuya in the living room. The man spent the entire morning scolding Dazai for ripping up his couch so long ago and he had finally gotten a new one and was putting it there. Dazai smirked. He didn't regret it in the slightest. That’s what Chuuya got for leaving him alone and locking him inside.

“I should really be having you do this,” Chuuya called from the other room. Dazai laughed loud enough for Chuuya to hear.

“My fragile body can’t handle all that strain. That’s why I have a big strong man to do all the work. Well, not big. A tiny one,” Dazai called back. He heard Chuuya huff and continued working. Dazai pressed his face into Chuuya’s pillow. It smelled like him. Chuuya had a very unique scent. It was earthy but oddly sweet. Like the forest full of flowers after a rainstorm.

Dazai didn’t know why Chuuya was still tolerating him. When Chuuya first saw him as a human, he was sure the man would either kill him or kick him out. He didn’t know why he was allowed to stay. Chuuya didn’t even make him work for it. There must be a motive. Chuuya is hiding something. He wants something from him. That was the only explanation.

But Dazai couldn’t figure out what it was. Chuuya showed no signs of anything like that. But there must be something. He just needed to find out what it was and confront Chuuya about it. But a part of Dazai didn’t want to. He wanted to bask in this life he now had. Without Chuuya, it was back to the streets. Atsushi had offered to help but Dazai didn’t want to be indebted to anyone. He shivered as he thought of what could happen if he was back on the streets. There were so many close encounters. So many times he saw that man. He didn’t want to experience that ever again. But was it really living when he had so many questions? Chuuya would eventually throw him out, he knew that. It was only a matter of time. That’s always how it was. Chuuya would realize that he wasn’t giving him what he wanted and would throw him out. Back on the cold streets.

His ears quivered and he whimpered to himself. The world seemed ready to spite him at every opportunity. Maybe he would have a better chance of killing himself here. Chuuya’s job was violent so he probably had a gun somewhere in the penthouse. He just needed to find it. It would be a simple and quick death and now he didn’t need to worry about someone using their knowledge to save him. Chuuya didn’t have medical knowledge, as far as he knew. He would just have to shoot himself while Chuuya was at work. It would be so simple.

He started feeling giddy at the thought. Finally. He would finally be free of all this suffering. His tail flicked from side to side and he heard Chuuya’s steps getting closer. The man stepped into the bedroom, glaring at Dazai.

“You’re such an asshole,” he huffed as he went into his closet. Dazai only hummed in response, shifting in the bed so he could keep an eye on Chuuya. He felt like he would start drooling as he saw Chuuya take off his shirt, showing his back muscles. There were multiple scars on his back and Dazai wondered if he had similar-looking ones. Every time Chuuya’s body started showing signs of him turning around, Dazai looked the other way so Chuuya wouldn’t know. He admired the man’s form. Chuuya was muscular, proof of his hard work. Dazai wondered about each of his scars and where they came from. He still didn’t know a lot about his roommate which irked him. He wanted to know everything. “Don’t f*ck up that couch, okay?”

“We’ll see,” Dazai answered vaguely. He loved riling the other man up. He saw Chuuya tense with his arms up as he pulled a new shirt on. Dazai mourned the loss of seeing Chuuya’s shirtless form as the man turned around, a scowl on his face.

“I’m serious. I’m letting you stay here, the least you can do is not destroy the place,” Chuuya crossed his arms and Dazai was reminded of Kunikida. The man was always scolding him as well. He hoped Atsushi had told him where he was now.

“Fine. You’re so boring,” Dazai huffed dramatically. Chuuya rolled his eyes and then he suddenly froze. Dazai was immediately on edge, searching for any danger. Chuuya turned towards him and his face was bright red.

“Why did you always sit outside the shower?” He sounded mortified as he spoke. Dazai broke into laughter. With how grave Chuuya sounded, you would think he realized he would die soon. “I-I’m serious! Why did you do that?”

“Chuuya is quite a sight,” Dazai winked. Chuuya’s face became even more red and the cat broke into giggles again. “I will say, for someone so short, you are well-endowed.”

“Stop! Don’t just say sh*t like that!” Chuuya tried to look stern but the blush on his face ruined it. Dazai giggled and stood up, sauntering closer.

“No need to be so shy, chibi. We’re both guys,” he purred into Chuuya’s ear. Chuuya pushed him away and stepped back. Dazai stumbled with the force of it, falling to the ground.

“D-Don’t. Don’t do that,” Chuuya’s voice was shaky as he spoke. Dazai could tell the man was being serious. His brain whirred with what he wanted to do. A part of him only wanted to tease him more but the other part told him to hold off on this one. The latter eventually won and he stood up but only to crawl onto the bed.

Chapter 11 Chapter Text

Dazai whined as he lay on the couch. Chuuya had banished him there, saying it was too weird now that he knew Dazai was human for them to be sleeping together. Dazai had pouted and complained but Chuuya was insistent. Dazai curled up in the blanket.

“I’m cold!” He called out. He heard a sigh from Chuuya’s bedroom followed by tired footsteps. Dazai sat up, ready to put on his best-begging face when another blanket slapped him in the face, making him fall back to the couch. Dazai huffed petulantly. He wrapped the second blanket around himself but nothing compared to Chuuya’s warmth. The human radiated heat like a furnace and Dazai was starting to miss it. He shook that thought from his mind. Chuuya was a human. The same creatures who would destroy anything they could. Who would use him as their personal toy. It was only a matter of time until Chuuya started doing the same. He couldn’t be led into a false sense of security.

Chuuya gave him shelter and food but he would be forced to repay soon. He wondered just how much Chuuya would make him pay. Would it be with his body? His life? He didn’t know. Chuuya gave no indication of what he could possibly want. Dazai tried desperately to figure it out but Chuuya didn’t show anything. It was frustrating.

He curled up with the blankets wrapped around him. He was still cold. He sighed and stood up. He wouldn’t be sleeping like this. He walked as lightly as he could to Chuuya’s room. The man was in his bed, his ginger hair starkly contrasting his white bed sheets. He stood awkwardly in the doorway, looking at the steady rise and fall of Chuuya’s chest. He slowly walked into the room. Even with how light he was, he knew that as soon as he got on the bed, Chuuya would wake up. The man was a light sleeper. He stood at the side of the bed and shook his head as he finally put his knee on it. As expected, Chuuya’s eyes immediately opened and zeroed in on Dazai.

“What are you doing, asshole?” He growled. Dazai expected a punch and to be thrown out of the room but the man sounded genuinely curious.

“Cold,” Dazai said as he got under the blanket. Chuuya shook his head with a sigh but he stayed still as Dazai got in the bed.

“Fine. Just stay on your side,” he huffed. Dazai nodded. It made sense that Chuuya didn’t want to touch him now. He must be revolting. He admired how Chuuya’s eyelashes fanned against his cheeks as he closed his eyes again. This was enough for Dazai. This closeness. He wanted it. He couldn’t deny it anymore. Chuuya had drawn him in like a moth to a flame. He wondered when he would get burned by it. Chuuya’s breathing soon evened out. Even without them touching, Dazai could feel his warmth. There were still many mysteries about Chuuya. His scent was different from other humans but he didn’t know why. There was something under it. Something fiery and powerful. It scared Dazai a bit but not too much. He wondered if Chuuya’s warmth came from that.

Dazai’s tail twitched and flicked, moving slightly closer to Chuuya. He willed it to stop. He couldn’t let his wants take over. He needed to focus on what he needed. He couldn’t get involved with Chuuya. He just needed to use him. Get a gun. That’s all he needed. An image of Chuuya’s distraught face when he found Dazai’s body flashed into his mind and he whimpered slightly before shaking his head. He didn’t care. He didn’t care if Chuuya got hurt. Chuuya was a human. He was just like the rest of them. Chuuya would start taking advantage of him soon. He didn’t know whether he hoped it would happen sooner or later. If it happened sooner, he could get rid of these unnecessary feelings. But he liked the way Chuuya was now. The selfish part of him wanted to stay like this. Living in this lie. But he couldn’t. He would never feel happiness and that was something he had accepted long ago.

He continued to stare at Chuuya’s sleeping face. The man’s brow would occasionally scrunch up as he dreamed and his hand would twitch a bit but that was all the movement that happened. Dazai remembered being a cat and pressed against Chuuya’s warm stomach. He was able to feel every movement the man made and could easily tell when he had nightmares.

He closed his eyes, savoring the overwhelming warmth coming from the man. He easily slipped into a peaceful sleep.

_______________________

“Chuuya-Kun. How has everything been going?” Mori’s voice was cloyingly sweet and it put Chuuya on edge. But he still bowed respectfully.

“Everything has been going well. All of my recent missions have been successes,” he responded seriously. That smile never left Mori’s face. It felt plastic and fake.

“As expected from you. How are things in your personal life? Have you taken my warnings seriously?” Mori’s voice dipped low in intimidation. Chuuya didn’t break eye contact. Every word that left Mori’s mouth felt like venom.

“Yes, I have, boss. I have been very cautious and wary. I assure you, I will never allow anyone to harm the port mafia,” Chuuya spoke resolutely. He meant what he said. He wondered if Mori was aware of his new roommate and that’s why he was asking these questions.

“I see. That’s wonderful. Elise-Chan mentioned your interest in cats,” Mori continued speaking even though Chuuya felt like there wasn’t much else to talk about. Each word the man spoke made Chuuya more suspicious. Mori must know something about Dazai. But Chuuya’s respect for the man made him cautious to ask. “Have you found yourself a cat? You seem more lively.”

“Yes, I have. Why do you ask?” Chuuya couldn’t stop the defensiveness from entering his voice. This conversation was making him increasingly uncomfortable but he didn’t know why. Why should he care if Mori knows about Dazai? Mori clapped his hands together.

“That’s wonderful. Perhaps you can have Elise-Chan over sometime. She’s been so upset since our cat ran away,” Mori’s voice had that same painfully cheerful quality to it. Chuuya awkwardly shook his head and Mori frowned.

“My cat is very skittish. I don’t think he would do well with children,” Chuuya awkwardly said. This entire conversation felt strange. He really needed to talk to Dazai about this. The way Mori was speaking implied he knew about Dazai.

“That’s a shame. But do be careful. With the number of abilities that exist nowadays, even a cat may be a spy,” Mori’s voice became deep again as he spoke, his fuchsia eyes sparkling. Chuuya held in a growl. He didn’t know why he felt so defensive over Dazai. The man hadn’t given him any reason to be but Chuuya felt like he was being honest when he said he wasn’t a spy. He refused to be disrespectful to his boss but he felt a deep burning inside him. The fires of Arahabaki raging and barely being contained. Chuuya could barely contain it.

It felt like a sign from God when Kouyou turned the corner. She caught Chuuya’s eye and he sent her the most pleading look he possibly could. The clacking of her heels echoed as she walked towards the two men.

“Chuuya! There you are,” her voice was soft and sweet, starkly different from Mori's. Mori looked at her in surprise but didn’t complain when she grabbed Chuuya’s arm. “I’m sorry, Mori-Dono but I need to borrow Chuuya for a bit. I really need his help.”

Mori nodded and waved them off. As soon as they were far away from him, Chuuya sighed in relief and Kouyou raised an eyebrow at him.

“What was that about? Did you get in trouble with Mori-Dono?” She asked. Chuuya shook his head. He didn’t know how to explain it. The whole conversation was still playing back in his head. He wanted answers. He would confront Dazai when he got home. Even if the cat dodged the question, he would be insistent and keep bringing it up until he got an answer.

“It’s… A long story,” Chuuya settled on that. Kouyou didn’t look amused and brought Chuuya into her private room. She sat down on the lavish couch, gesturing to the spot beside her.

“I have plenty of time,” she said. Chuuya sighed. He ran through his options. Ane-San would be safe to talk to. He sat next to her and began to explain everything. From bringing Dazai into his home to the reveal. Once he was done, Kouyou was staring at him with her mouth hanging open.

“So, yeah. I feel like the boss has some information about Dazai,” Chuuya took a deep breath once he was done with everything. Kouyou still looked to be in a state of shock.

“I… I see. I agree that you need to speak to your little roommate about this. That was a lot to take in,” she played with the sleeves of her elegant kimono and Chuuya nodded.

Chapter 12 Chapter Text

As Chuuya entered his penthouse, he was greeted by meowing as Dazai wound his way between his legs. The little tabby was meowing incessantly and Chuuya had to fight the urge to smile and pet him. He needed answers. He continued to meow as Chuuya took off his shoes and coat and stepped into the penthouse. The little tabby was trailing after him. Chuuya was tempted to not talk about what he needed to but he knew that this had to be done.

“Can you change into your human form?” He asked. In a puff of smoke, Dazai was standing in front of him. He draped himself over Chuuya.

“Is the chibi in love with me? He just can’t stand not seeing me, huh?” Dazai teased. Chuuya blushed and pushed him away. Dazai giggled, as usual.

“Of course not! I just need to talk to you!” Chuuya growled. Dazai put his hands on his hips and pouted. Chuuya hated that he had to look up to look the brat in the eyes. “Listen… I had a strange conversation with my boss today.”

Chuuya saw Dazai’s body tense and his suspicions were immediately heightened. The cat’s tail swished from side to side, expressing his fear.

“What kind of strange conversation?” Dazai asked. Chuuya shook his head. Dazai was going to act clueless.

“My boss’ name is Mori Ougai. You know him, don’t you?” Chuuya decided to be upfront. Dazai didn’t respond, his eyes glued on the floor. “He came up to me and talked to me. He kept mentioning me having a cat. It was like he knew you and knew that I adopted you. Please, Dazai. Just tell me. Do you know him?”

Dazai was still silent. His hands were turning white with how hard he was gripping his shirt. His ears were pressed to his head. He looked like the scrappy cat that Chuuya had picked up off the street. Part of him wanted to drop the subject now but he needed answers.

“Come on, Dazai. The way he was speaking to me was really weird. I need answers as to why that happened. I’m not going to judge you or kick you out if you’re worried about that. I… I can’t trust you if you hide things from me,” Chuuya could hardly speak. Even his cat didn’t trust him? What would he do if Dazai betrayed him too?

“I… It’s not that simple,” Dazai finally spoke. His voice cracked in the middle. Chuuya was glad that the cat spoke at all. His tail was lashing back and forth aggressively.

“What do you mean? Just tell me if you know him or not?” Chuuya’s voice started to rise and anger. He was sick of people betraying him.

“I do know him but it’s not that simple!” Dazai’s voice raised in response to Chuuya. Anger flashed in his brown eyes. His fur was on end and Chuuya heard him growling lightly. He had no right to growl at him. He was the one hiding sh*t.

“Why can’t you just tell me?” Chuuya growled back. Dazai’s tail slapped Chuuya’s leg as it lashed back and forth. Dazai looked down at Chuuya with clear disdain in his eyes.

“You’re just like every other human. You bully until you get what you want. I’m allowed to have secrets,” Dazai’s voice dripped with hate. Chuuya clenched his fists and tried to squash his anger. He usually got out his anger on missions but he couldn’t do that here. He already suspected Dazai had been abused. Any violent action would only set him off more.

“You’re in my home. I’m allowed to demand things from you,” Chuuya huffed. Dazai clenched his fists as well and his lips drew back in a snarl.

“So that’s what you want in return. You want all of my knowledge. I knew you weren’t doing it out of the kindness of your own heart,” Dazai’s words pierced through Chuuya’s chest. He shouldn’t have said that. But it was too late now and he was still angry with the cat.

“Shut up! Stop talking to me like that! I’ve done so much for you and yet you keep disrespecting me and keeping things from me! So you’re just using me,” Chuuya’s fists shook at his sides. Dazai scoffed and turned away from Chuuya. Chuuya’s first instinct was to grab his shoulder and force the other man to look at him. So he did. He gripped the taller man’s shoulder and forced him to turn around. Dazai slapped his hand away but didn’t turn back around.

“You promised you didn’t want anything in return and yet you bring up everything you’ve done for me to try and get what you want. Just like every human,” Dazai scoffed. Chuuya narrowed his eyes to slits. He needed to calm his temper. But it had been a very long time since someone had disrespected him.

“Don’t give me that! I’m asking you for something so simple. Just to tell me how you know my boss. It isn’t that hard,” Chuuya huffed. He didn’t understand why Dazai refused to tell him. “Are you actually a spy? Is that why? Would it reveal the truth about you?”

“Obviously not! He brought that idea up to you so you would suspect me and throw me out!” Dazai screamed back. His brown eyes were wide, allowing Chuuya to see the rage and hurt in his eyes. Chuuya took a step back. Why did Dazai look hurt? It’s not like he cared. Chuuya was just a dirty human to him.

“Dazai. I can’t have you living here if I can’t trust you,” Chuuya sighed, crossing his arms.

“So you’re just letting him get exactly what he wants. I’m sure there are people outside your home constantly in case you kick me out so they can snatch me,” Dazai whispered so lightly that Chuuya could barely hear him.

“What are you talking about?” Chuuya tilted his head. He genuinely had no idea what Dazai was saying. Dazai shook his head, his ears pressed against his head. There was a flash of smoke and the sound of the cat’s paws padding away. Chuuya sighed. He didn’t get what he wanted to know but it was best for him to calm down. He saw a tail vanish into his bedroom so he knew to stay away from there for a bit. They both needed to calm down.

He mulled over what Dazai said. He was curious. He stepped out of the apartment and down to the lobby of the apartment building. He looked around and saw that there were some people that he had never seen before. Men in black suits. They seemed to be on high alert. When Chuuya walked past them, they bowed slightly, confirming Chuuya’s suspicions.

“What are you guys doing here?” Chuuya asked a tall man. The man tensed a bit before responding.

“Mori-San ordered us to guard this place,” his voice was firm but in a way that he must have practiced those words many times in his head.

“Why?” Chuuya asked skeptically. He knew that this man wouldn’t tell him the truth but it would give him something to go off of.

“Because of the spies. Mori-San believes that all of the executives are in danger so he has ordered guards to all of them,” the man said. Chuuya nodded. He was sure that wasn’t the case. Mori trusted his executives to be strong enough to protect themselves. He took the elevator back up. Dazai was right. But what did that mean? Mori was trying to get Dazai? But why?

It was clear by now that Dazai had some sort of connection to his boss, but he didn’t know what that connection was. He stepped back into the penthouse and went to his room. Dazai was lying on his bed, still in cat form.

“You were right. There are people in the lobby who are going to snatch you if they spot you, so don’t leave the penthouse,” Chuuya ordered. Dazai didn’t respond and turned so his fluffy back was pointed at Chuuya. He sighed. So that’s how it was going to be.

He felt a bit guilty for their fight but it didn’t change that he was in the right. He deserved to know that information. He huffed as he went to the kitchen. Dazai would be lured out by crab. He knew it. He started getting to work on dinner. The entire apartment was dead silent other than the sounds of his cooking. It was unsettling. Chuuya had gotten used to the noises Dazai would make as he walked around and messed with his stuff. He was used to meows and purrs.

He hoped he didn’t f*ck everything up by confronting Dazai. His mind wandered to what Mori could have done to Dazai. The most obvious explanation would be abuse. Dazai showed the signs of someone who had been abused so maybe Mori was the culprit. Chuuya definitely wouldn’t put it past the man.

When he called Dazai saying he had made crab, there was no answer. Chuuya ate his dinner alone, feeling the pressing loneliness all over again.

Chapter 13 Chapter Text

The silence of the penthouse was suffocating. Chuuya felt like it was sucking the air from his lungs. Dazai still hadn’t come out of his room. The food was getting cold. He put the food in the fridge and sighed. He needed to go into his room so he could sleep. He never would have imagined being reluctant to go into his own room. He stood in the doorway. Dazai was in his cat form on his bed, his back facing the doorway. His tail was flicking back and forth in irritation.

“Dazai. We need to talk,” he sighed. His voice was filled with pain. Dazai didn’t respond. He only curled up tighter. Chuuya sighed and shook his head. He walked into his closet and got changed into some comfortable clothes. When he got into bed, Dazai immediately got up and jumped off the bed. He heard the soft sound of paws padding away out of the room. He sighed. While he did make Dazai sleep on the couch at first, he couldn’t deny that he enjoyed Dazai sleeping in bed with him. The warmth of the cat at his side was comforting. He clenched his fists. Why was Dazai being so damn stubborn? All he wanted to know was if he knew his boss. It wasn’t that hard to explain. His silence only made Chuuya more suspicious.

Maybe Dazai really was a spy, weaseling his way into Chuuya’s life to take advantage of him. Chuuya growled low in his throat. The idea made him angry. He had let Dazai into his life, he took care of him and provided for him and this is what he got in return? It was bullsh*t.

He closed his eyes, trying desperately to fall asleep but he couldn’t. His mind was racing. He eventually got up and walked into the kitchen for a drink. He saw Dazai’s form on the couch, covered by a thin blanket. Not complaining about being cold now, huh? He rolled his eyes and made some quick tea to hopefully calm him. He drank the fragrant tea. Kouyou had given him this type of tea since she knew about his sleeping problems. Apparently, it aided in sleep, but he doubted that. He slowly drank from his cup while looking at Dazai. The man’s chest was steadily rising and falling but Chuuya could tell it was fake. There was no way the cold bastard would be able to sleep while he was only covered by such a thin blanket. He sighed as he went into one of the closets he had and pulled out a heavy blanket. He draped it over the man’s body, a frown still on his face. Dazai nuzzled into the new warmth but didn’t open his eyes. Chuuya rolled his eyes. Despite the fact that he was mad at the other, he couldn’t deny how cute he looked.

He walked back into the kitchen and finished his tea before placing the cup in the washing machine before returning to his room. As he got under the blanket, he was struck by how big his bed suddenly felt.

____________________

Kouyou’s overwhelmingly sweet perfume filled any room she was in. She had invited Chuuya out for lunch and he had reluctantly agreed. He knew the older woman was able to read him like a book and he saw her looking at him multiple times that day. He wasn’t acting like he usually did. He was distracted and irritable. His mind was filled with thoughts of Dazai and what he would do if he did turn out to be a spy. There was no doubt that Kouyou had noticed his strange behavior and mood. But she was being quiet, which only put him more on edge. He ate in silence, enjoying the expensive wine they served. He wondered if Dazai had eaten the leftovers in the fridge or not. He then shook his head and cursed himself. Why should he give a sh*t about that bastard? He didn’t care about him. Kouyou raised an eyebrow at him.

“You’re making some very strange facial expressions, Chuuya. What’s on your mind?” The older woman asked. Everything about her screamed sophistication. Many people naturally avoided her due to the aura of regality she naturally exuded. But Chuuya didn’t. Kouyou practically raised him in the mafia. Her tastes rubbed off on him, making him someone to enjoy the fancier things in life. He shook his head in response to her question.

“It’s nothing,” he huffed. Kouyou did not look pleased. Her eyes narrowed and she tapped her long nails on the table.

“I don’t appreciate lies, Chuuya,” her voice was intimidating. It told Chuuya that she wouldn’t stand for any nonsense. He sighed. He didn’t want to talk about this.

“I’m having trouble with Dazai. He has some connection with Mori but I don’t know what it is and he refuses to tell me. I tried confronting him and he told me nothing. Now he’s giving me the silent treatment. I just don’t know. What if he is a spy?” Chuuya felt a weight lifted when he said it. It was nice now that he could talk to Kouyou about Dazai. Kouyou hummed as Chuuya explained how Dazai was acting.

“Chuuya, your pride will be the end of you,” she sighed. Chuuya raised an eyebrow. How the hell was this his fault? “I haven’t even met him but I can tell Dazai is like you in that regard. You’re both too prideful. Sometimes you have to admit you have some fault. You’re both being stubborn and not talking to each other.”

“That’s not it! I’ve tried and he just ignores me! This is his fault!” Chuuya exclaimed. He didn’t understand how any of this was his fault. Dazai was the one keeping sh*t from him when it was something he deserved to know. “I deserve to know this! I deserve to know his connection with my damn boss!”

“You don’t, Chuuya. Don’t get so wound up. Why do you deserve it? Is it because you let him into your home? Is it because you’re providing for him? Are you doing something like that for him to give you the right to know certain information?” Kouyou’s voice was even and calm which only made Chuuya more angry. Why did no one understand? “I’m not saying that you’re all to blame. Dazai is hiding something from you. But I think he’s scared. Whatever it is that’s between him and Mori-Dono must be important to him. It's like if someone wanted to force you to talk about being experimented on as a child.”

Chuuya’s anger slowly bled from him as Kouyou finished speaking. She was right. He clenched his fists, angry with himself. He shouldn’t have been so insistent.

“What do I do, Ane-San?” He asked. He wanted to keep Dazai around but what if he ruined everything already? What if Dazai was done with him? Kouyou gave him a patient smile.

“I’m not you but I would sit down and have a calm discussion with him but you need to be in the right headspace. Don't go in after a stressful day because you’ll just explode. The both of you need to calmly talk. He may even tell you what you want to know,” she recommended. Chuuya nodded. She was right. He felt so relieved that he finally had a course of action. Maybe he could save this.

“Thank you, Ane-San. I’ll update you,” he said as he stood up. They had already finished eating. He felt ready to talk with Dazai right now. Kouyou waved at him as he hurried out. He ran to his motorcycle and got on. As he drove, he thought about what he needed to say. It would probably be a bit difficult but it was necessary. He needed to be calm and gentle. That wasn’t something he was used to but he could learn. The wind whipped through his hair and it felt freeing. Kouyou was right. He may even get the answers he wanted. If Dazai didn’t want to tell him still, then that's fine too. He could live with it. He hadn’t told Dazai everything about his life either after all. He hurried into the large apartment building and ran up the stairs. The elevator would take too long and he was already bursting with energy. He practically threw the door to his penthouse open and ran in. The first thing he saw was a terrified cat jumping into the air before running into his room. He took a deep breath and laughed at the image. “Sorry, Dazai! It’s just me!”

The little cat peeked out of his room. His pupils were blown wide and his fur was on end. He ducked back into Chuuya’s room. Chuuya sighed.

“Dazai, can we talk? I promise I won’t get mad at you,” he called out. There was no response and Chuuya sighed. He took off his shoes and walked into his room. Dazai was on his bed. “Come on, Dazai. We can’t live like this. I won’t get mad and I won’t force you to tell me anything you don’t want to.”

A flash of smoke and Dazai sat in front of Chuuya. He had his arms crossed as he looked down at the other man.

“Fine. We can talk.”

Chapter 14 Chapter Text

Dazai looked extremely hesitant, his tail lashing back and forth as he looked down at Chuuya.

“I… I know Mori,” Dazai’s voice was soft, barely loud enough to hear. His ears were pressed against his head. He looked like the ragged little cat Chuuya had picked up off the street. Chuuya waited for Dazai to continue talking but he was silent.

“Okay. How do you know him?” Chuuya prodded. Dazai huffed, narrowing his eyes. Chuuya leaned back and waited for the cat to answer.

“I… I lived with him. Although I wouldn’t classify it like that. It was more of a prison. I was a kitten living on the streets when Elise found me. She immediately grabbed me. I tried to claw her but she still held on. Mori brought me to his home,” Dazai explained. His speech seemed to get faster as he got into his memories. His long nails dug into the couch. Chuuya could see how different Dazai was now. He felt a pit in his stomach when he heard that Dazai was a kitten. He knew Mori’s… Tastes.

“Was Elise rough with you?” Chuuya spoke up when it was clear that Dazai wasn’t going to keep talking. Dazai nodded. His ears were still pressed against his head.

“Yes, but she wasn’t the worst. It was him. Once he found out what I was, it was hell. I did everything to hide it but he found out,” Dazai growled. Chuuya sighed. He knew exactly what kind of man Mori was, but he still hoped that the man he had sworn loyalty to wasn’t so bad. “So, are you going to kick me out?”

“Huh? Why would I do that?” Chuuya tilted his head. Dazai’s head snapped up in shock. Chuuya felt proud that he was able to surprise the bastard.

“Well, your boss is after me! So wouldn’t you have to get rid of me? Why would you risk getting on his bad side?” Dazai asked. Chuuya shrugged. He was far too useful to Mori for him to be thrown away because he had Mori’s previous pet. He reached out and flicked Dazai on the forehead.

“I make my own decisions. If you want to leave, I’m not going to stop you, but I’m not kicking you out,” he replied. He could have sworn he saw a spark of emotion in those dark eyes but it vanished as quickly as it appeared.

Everything was clicking in Chuuya’s mind. Elise mentioned that they had lost a cat. It must have been Dazai. With how roughly Elise handled the cats she saw, he could imagine how she was with Dazai. And he didn’t even want to think about the types of things Mori had done.

“How did you get out?” He asked. Dazai pulled his knees to his chest. He looked so much smaller. So much more fragile. It wasn’t how Chuuya was used to seeing the co*cky bastard.

“Atsushi-Kun helped me. Atsushi-Kun is living with someone who works under Mori. Akutagawa. We were together as kittens. He came and helped me out. He broke a window and I ran. I never looked back. I’ve always been terrified of being found again,” Dazai explained. His brown eyes were wide with terror. Chuuya was extremely curious about exactly what Dazai went through but he wasn’t so insensitive as to ask. This was obviously hard on the cat.

The news about Akutagawa also made sense. He saw how the younger man was so much happier now. It must be because of Atsushi. He smirked as he thought of how he could tease the other man now. He reached out to pet Dazai but he shrank away.

“Don’t touch me!” He yelped. Chuuya was shocked by how strong his reaction was. Dazai’s eyes slowly cleared of fear and he looked away. “Sorry. Just… Not now.”

“Okay. I won’t,” he said, putting his hands up. He only wanted to comfort the other so if it wouldn’t comfort Dazai, he wouldn't do it. Dazai glared at Chuuya.

“Can't believe you’re making me say all of this. You’re so cruel,” he whined but his voice was tinged with his usual playfulness which made Chuuya sigh in relief. He was worried that talking about his trauma would have made Dazai stay in that state of shock. “So mean.”

“Yeah, yeah I’m terrible,” Chuuya chuckled. He was glad that they could joke like they usually did. Dazai was starting to relax again, his tail no longer lashing and his ears slowly rising from their position against his head.

“Why? Why would you allow me to stay?” Dazai asked, quietly. Chuuya shrugged. He wasn’t sure why he was so attached to the bastard either. He was endlessly annoying but there was something refreshing about someone who had no trouble speaking against him and would do so in an instant. Knowing he had someone waiting for him at home was something he hadn’t known he needed before Dazai came along.

“Because I want to,” he settled on that. Dazai pouted at the nonanswer. Chuuya was happy to see some of the light return to his eyes.

“So, people are out there? Waiting to get me? What will I do if they come in when you’re at work?” Dazai asked, scratching at his own skin. Chuuya huffed. He hadn’t thought of that. He had a security system that would immediately notify him if anyone got into his penthouse but what would he do if he couldn’t make it in time?

“I have a security system. If it goes off, I’ll come running,” Chuuya promised. Dazai whimpered but didn’t say anything else. His eyes were fixed on one of the windows that overlooked Yokohama. He looked lost, his eyes an empty abyss.

“I shouldn’t be here. I should be somewhere else. I’ll bring trouble to you. Everything I’ve wanted to have has already been lost. I will only lose you too,” he whispered. Chuuya felt a bit of anger rise up but squashed it. He was strong. Dazai was acting like he was made of glass and would shatter at any second.

“I can handle myself, Dazai,” he huffed but still grabbed him and pulled him onto his lap. Dazai struggled for a second before relaxing with an angry pout. Chuuya stroked between his ears. “What did Mori do to you?”

Dazai immediately tensed again but Chuuya wanted to know. He wanted to make sure he didn’t accidentally bring back bad memories for him.

“It was hell. Mori found me to be very intriguing. He… Would experiment on me. He wanted to know how every structure in my body worked. Even though my body in this form is the same as a human just with my ears and tail. He almost completely severed my tail one time,” Dazai swallowed heavily. He lifted his tail and showed Chuuya a portion closer to his body. The skin under the fur was heavily scarred and mutilated. Chuuya gritted his teeth. The man he had pledged loyalty to was doing sh*t like this. “I was a kitten. I had no idea what was happening. It just got worse and worse. I was there for ten years. He would also touch me. I hated that the most. I wanted to throw up every time. I would have preferred he cut me a thousand times than violate me like that once.”

Dazai’s breathing was speeding up at an alarming rate and he looked unable to contain it. Chuuya held him and scratched behind the ears but Dazai continued breathing heavily. Chuuya panicked. He didn’t know what to do in a situation like this. He grabbed Dazai by the shoulders and tried to shake him but his hands were immediately slashed by sharp nails. A puff of smoke went out and Chuuya heard the scurrying of tiny paws running away. Chuuya touched the scratches on his arms. They were already starting to bleed. Chuuya cursed his own stupidity in asking. He should have guessed and not asked. He knew Dazai was probably hiding under his bed right now so he vowed to stay out of that room for a while until he calmed down.

_____________________

Chuuya was getting started on making dinner when he heard footsteps. He looked up and saw Dazai peeking in from the hall. He waved to show he wasn’t angry and Dazai walked into the kitchen. His ears were still pressed to his head and his tail tucked between his legs.

“Sorry for asking about that,” Chuuya spoke quietly. It hurt his pride but he knew it needed to be said. Dazai looked surprised and opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out. Chuuya returned his attention to the meal he was making. Dazai spent the rest of that time bothering him and distracting him as he cooked. Chuuya relaxed. It felt right now. He was used to Dazai messing with him in the kitchen. Even when he was a cat, he would twirl around Chuuya’s legs, meowing incessantly.

Chapter 15 Chapter Text

Rage pulsed inside of Chuuya’s body, begging to be let out. He knew his boss was messed up but he never expected this level. Dazai was looking at him with wide eyes, watching him pace back and forth. His fists were clenched and he could feel Arahabaki’s rage latching onto his anger.

“Chibi, calm down,” Dazai spoke up. Chuuya growled low in his throat. He didn’t want to lash out at the cat. He wasn’t mad at Dazai. He was mad FOR Dazai. He didn’t see how the other man wasn’t mad as well. He stopped pacing. He knew that if he continued, he would only keep getting more angry.

Chuuya was having a crisis in his mind. Part of him wanted to run to headquarters and beat the sh*t out of his boss. The other part screamed about loyalty. He had devoted himself to Mori. Mori had given him a purpose. Should he really throw that all away because of Dazai? He only met Dazai recently. He had known Mori and had been in the mafia for years. Even if he did let his rage win, he would end up on the run with Dazai. No one who was hunted by the mafia ever survived. Kouyou had told him that exact thing in regard to her lover. How he had tried to run away with her and was killed in front of her eyes.

Chuuya huffed as he sank into the couch. The world around him didn’t feel real. Why was this happening? Everything was so simple a month ago. But everything was so lonely too. He looked at Dazai. His ears were twitching nervously. He reached out and scratched him behind the ears, making him purr.

“I won’t let Mori get you, I promise,” he whispered. Dazai nodded and butted his head against Chuuya’s hand, demanding to be petted more. Chuuya chuckled. Dazai was good at getting his mind off things. Dazai’s purr was so loud as Chuuya scratched harder. “How are you not affected by talking about all that sh*t?”

“I am. I’m just good at hiding it. Showing genuine emotion only leads to your downfall. I’ve been taught that. Emotions are useless. It’s pointless to be angry about the past. I can’t go back. I can’t take back what I’ve lost. I can only wait for what I currently have to fall apart,” Dazai’s voice dripped with melancholy. Chuuya could understand Dazai’s pain. There was a period of time when he thought the same. After the flags died, he was convinced he was cursed to have everything he cared about robbed from him. But he recovered from that state. He knew Dazai could as well.

“What makes you think like that?” Chuuya whispered. Dazai looked at Chuuya as if he were stupid. Chuuya kind of wanted to smack that look off his face.

“I’ve lost everything. Even as a kitten. My parents abandoned me. I was left to fend for myself. The only reason I survived was because of another Bakeneko. His name was Oda Sakunosuke. I always called him Odasaku,” Chuuya had never heard so much emotion in Dazai’s voice before. “He saved me. He should have just left me to die. He was so kind. He made sure I was fed and taught me how to fend for myself on the streets. When Mori found me, he tried to save me. He tried so hard. But… Mori killed him. I had to watch the only person who ever cared about me die before my eyes.”

Dazai’s eyes were glistening with tears that refused to fall. Chuuya had never seen Dazai so distressed. Even when describing how he was abused, he never looked this upset. He clawed at his own tail and Chuuya saw some blood start to bead from it. He reached out and removed Dazai’s hands from his own tail. The Bakeneko glared at him but put his hands down on either side of him.

“Everything that I want will always be lost. Even you. Eventually, you will die or you will abandon me. That’s always how it works,” Dazai growled. Chuuya had mixed feelings. On one hand, he felt warmth in knowing that Dazai wanted him. But on the other, he felt anger that Dazai would ever doubt him.

“I would never do that. This is your home now. You don’t have to worry about it being taken from you,” he whispered. Dazai scoffed and rolled his eyes.

“Eventually you will get bored of me. There’s no reason to lie, Chibi,” he giggled in what was supposed to be a carefree way. It sounded painfully fake to Chuuya. Chuuya crossed his arms and Dazai raised an eyebrow. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Because that’s not true. I won’t get bored. So stop acting like I’m suddenly going to kick you out,” Chuuya growled. He gripped Dazai by the shoulders.

“You can’t make me think differently. I know it’s going to happen. Whatever use you think I have, I won’t have at some point,” Dazai snarled back. Chuuya acted on his impulses, desperate to get the other to shut up.

Dazai’s lips were warm but chapped. Chuuya licked at them and was surprised when Dazai opened his mouth to let him in. Chuuya took the invitation, his tongue pushing into Dazai’s mouth and exploring it. The man’s mouth was warm and wet, inviting Chuuya to explore more. He felt triumphant when his tongue brushed over a spot that made Dazai whine high in his throat. He smirked a bit as he explored deeper. Dazai hesitantly reached his arms up, wrapping them around Chuuya’s neck.

Chuuya groaned as Dazai started to kiss back, their tongues exploring each other’s mouths. Dazai was drooling and his tail wrapped around Chuuya’s hips, pulling them closer. Chuuya felt his body heating up. For once, it wasn’t from anger. Dazai’s mouth was warm and Chuuya wanted to explore every inch of it. The little whimpers Dazai was making made it all the better.

He pulled the taller man closer. With how skinny he was, it was remarkably easy. Dazai pressed their bodies together, crawling into Chuuya’s lap to get as close as possible. Chuuya pulled away for a moment to speak.

“This is what your mouth should be used for instead of spouting that bullsh*t,” he whispered. Dazai narrowed his eyes and opened his mouth to argue but Chuuya resumed kissing him. Dazai made some protesting sounds for a moment before giving in to the pleasure of the kiss. Chuuya knew he was a good kisser. Everyone he had slept with said the same thing. His tongue piercing rubbed against the top of Dazai’s mouth and he gasped, his long nails digging into Chuuya’s shoulders. “See? A much better use of your mouth. This is why I won’t get bored of you.”

“Just shut up and keep kissing him. Don’t bore me with your dumb talk,” Dazai growled. Chuuya narrowed his eyes but pushed Dazai flat on his back on the couch and attacked his mouth. It felt too good to deny himself. Dazai wrapped both his arms and legs around Chuuya. The shorter man was rock hard and he felt like he was a horny teenager again. Who gets this turned on just from kissing? He must be really pent-up since he hasn’t slept with anyone recently. But he knew that this wasn’t the time to f*ck Dazai. They needed to talk first. Dazai, despite his fake confidence, was clearly an inexperienced kisser. He was going along with what Chuuya was doing but didn’t do anything else. Chuuya found it to be very endearing. This meant that Dazai had probably never had consensual sex before either. “W-Why does it…”

“Feel good?” Chuuya teased. Dazai pouted, crossing his arms. It looked ridiculous with Dazai under him. Chuuya caressed his cheek and made him look at him. “You’re so cute.”

Dazai was the one to smash their lips together this time. His actions spoke of raw need and Chuuya could feel how hard he was as well. Dazai whimpered as Chuuya pressed their bodies together, making their co*cks rub against each other through their clothes. Dazai’s noises were adorable to Chuuya and he wanted to hear them more and more. Their tongues tangled together as Dazai got more confident and kissed more insistently. The brunette used his tongue to feel Chuuya’s piercing. Chuuya groaned low in his throat. He gripped the other’s face. They were so close but he wanted to be closer. He wanted to mold into Dazai. To make him belong to him only.

Every soft moan Dazai let out was a reward to Chuuya. He wanted him all to himself. Dazai’s ears were twitching in pleasure as Chuuya’s tongue explored deep in his mouth, the tip pressing against his soft palate. Chuuya pulled away, leaving them both breathing heavily.

“That’s why I’m not going to kick you out,” Chuuya whispered, his forehead pressed to Dazai’s so they could look into each other’s eyes. Dazai’s pupils were blown in lust and the image made Chuuya incredibly horny. But he pushed it down. They needed to speak before they took things any further.

Chapter 16 Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

“I’m not going any further right now,” Chuuya said as Dazai got on his lap. The cat’s face was split into a wicked smirk. His tail wrapped around Chuuya.

“How long will you be able to resist me, chibi?” Dazai was so close that Chuuya felt the puff of his breath on his lips. He was painfully hard but he was able to ignore it. As badly as he wanted to f*ck Dazai, he wouldn’t do it before they’ve talked about things.

“I’ll be able to resist until we talk about this,” Chuuya crossed his arms and Dazai pouted. His ears pressed against his head and he looked like Chuuya just kicked him.

“Talking is boring!” He complained like a child. Chuuya rolled his eyes. They were both adults. He wouldn’t f*ck Dazai before they’ve had a proper discussion. “This is abuse.”

“No, it isn’t. This is for your own good. It’s for the good of both of us. I don’t want to do anything that could potentially hurt you and I don’t plan on sleeping with someone before I have a discussion about what it means for our relationship,” Chuuya grabbed Dazai’s face, forcing the bakeneko to look him in the eyes. Dazai looked profoundly uncomfortable.

“I don’t want to talk, Chuuya. I want more of your tongue down my throat. You seemed perfectly content to do just that a couple of minutes ago,” Dazai growled. He was still so close and it was driving Chuuya a little crazy. Dazai pouted more, slumping forward so his head was resting on Chuuya’s shoulder. “You’re so mean. Denying me what I want.”

“I wouldn’t have to deny you what you want if you’d just talk about this with me. Why do you not want to talk about it?” Chuuya asked. He couldn’t help himself from grabbing Dazai’s hips, keeping his grip light but present. His mind filled with images of Dazai laid out in front of him, legs spread wide and moaning as Chuuya pulled him back into every thrust. He immediately let go of the man’s hips in the hopes of those images going away but they stayed in his mind. There was no denying how badly he wanted Dazai.

“I don’t want to talk about it! Why should we have to? Is the chibi insecure about his performance in bed and doesn’t want me to leave if I’m disappointed,” Dazai’s voice had his usual teasing lilt to it. Chuuya growled deep in his throat. Dazai was truly insufferable but there was just something about him that captivated Chuuya in every way. The brunette pouted more when Chuuya didn’t immediately agree to f*ck him. “People hook up all the time.”

“But I don’t want it to be a hookup. We live together. It’ll be awkward as hell if we don’t discuss things,” Chuuya sighed. Dazai was so smart but he was pretty dense now. “Just tell me why you don’t want to talk about it.”

“Because it’s pointless. I don’t want to put a label on something that’s inevitably going to be ripped away from me. It’ll just make me that much more miserable,” Dazai finally revealed his true feelings and Chuuya looked at him sadly. Dazai wore sadness and misery like a second skin. Chuuya could understand. Dazai scowled at him. “Don’t look at me like that. I don’t need your pity. I don’t need anybody’s pity.”

“It’s not pity. It’s empathy. I don’t pity you,” Chuuya assured him. Dazai reminded Chuuya a lot of himself when he was younger. After he lost everything. The flags, the sheep, everything was ripped from him. It took him forever to truly recover and look forward rather than backward. “I understand why you wouldn’t want to talk about it but we need to. I don’t want things to be unclear between us. I really like you, Dazai. I don’t want this to be a problem. I don’t want us to f*ck and move on.”

“Is the chibi confessing his love for me? How perverse. Falling in love with your cat,” Dazai teased. Chuuya rolled his eyes. Dazai would take any chance to make fun of him. He dug his fingers into the taller man’s hips, making him gasp.

“Don’t make fun of my confession,” he growled. Dazai only rolled his eyes. He leaned forward, his breath ghosting over Chuuya’s ear.

“I never expected a chibi like you to fall so easily for someone like me,” he whispered. Chuuya shivered. Dazai was so close. It would be so easy to pin him down and f*ck him right now but he held back. But not completely. Chuuya pinned Dazai down on the couch, glaring down at him.

“Stop talking about me like that and stop talking about yourself like you're a menace!” He growled. Dazai looked up at him with those big brown eyes. They ensnared Chuuya in a frozen state. He was above the bakeneko, looking down at him. It was exactly the type of position he wanted to be in just with fewer clothes.

“You don’t understand! You don’t get to decide what I think of myself or you!” Dazai exclaimed, baring his teeth. Chuuya growled in response, his blue eyes boring into Dazai. Dazai’s face split into a grin. “And if you really think this position is some kind of punishment for me, it’s not. Why don’t you give in to your desires, Chuuya? I know you want to rip off my clothes and f*ck me. Wouldn’t it feel so good inside me? So nice and warm?”

“Sh-Shut up,” Chuuya’s face was bright red. The images assaulted his mind. He didn’t want to be manipulated into this. He wouldn’t. He got off of Dazai. The cat pouted as he also got up. Chuuya’s head was in his hands. “Y-You’re so insufferable. Why do you insist on making this so hard?”

“You know why. Because this is who I am. You’re the delusional one. I don’t know what you see in me but it’s a lie. You shouldn’t want anything more than sex from me. You should f*ck me and move on,” Dazai said. His voice was completely flat. There wasn’t a hint of his usual playfulness. Chuuya wanted to cry. He didn’t know about what though. Would he cry for himself? Or for Dazai, who believed he was only as good as what he could offer? For both of them? He didn’t know. He also refused to cry in front of the other man. “But, if it makes the chibi hurry up, I can be the chibi’s short-term boyfriend.”

Chuuya felt the smallest light of hope before Dazai crushed it. Short term. Dazai wasn’t going to stay for long and he would leave Chuuya with another gaping hole in his heart. Chuuya reached out and gripped his arm.

“Stop. Just stop, Dazai,” he whispered. Dazai was quiet but cautiously crept onto Chuuya’s lap. Chuuya wrapped his arms around the taller man, squeezing him. The brunette wheezed but still wrapped his arms around Chuuya’s neck.

“Sorry. I just… Can’t understand you. And you can’t understand me. There’s no way something like me can be happy. Everything is inevitably ripped from me. I don’t know why you want me in the first place. I’m broken, Chuuya. You want something that is defective,” Dazai’s voice had a soft tone for once. Chuuya ran his fingers through Dazai’s hair. They were both so broken.

“I can understand you. It will just take time. You are so convinced that we don’t have that time. But we do. I know we do. I’ll make sure of it. I won’t let anything happen, I promise,” Chuuya whispered. He could tell the other man didn’t believe him but he continued to hold him. “I really like you, Dazai.”

“I know.”

“I want you to stay with me.”

“I know.”

“Will you?” Chuuya tried to keep the hope out of his voice. He didn’t want to manipulate Dazai’s decision in any way. Dazai sighed, nuzzling against the redhead’s neck.

“I don’t know, Chuuya. I can’t make promises like that. Because I’ve grown to like you too. And I know the poison that I leave behind. Just because you are willing to be poisoned doesn’t mean I want to do it to you. I’ll… I’ll try,” Dazai whispered. Chuuya wanted to cheer but he kept in his joy, settling on a small smile. “Can we kiss again?”

“Depends. Will you date me?” Chuuya asked. Dazai pulled his face away from the other’s neck. He looked away for a moment, looking conflicted before he looked back.

“Fine, since the chibi is so desperate for a lover,” he petulantly stuck his nose up. Chuuya grinned widely before narrowing his eyes at the insulting tone Dazai used. “How long have you wanted to f*ck your kitty, Chuuya?”

“D-Don’t call yourself that,” Chuuya blushed. He felt so embarrassed now that Dazai was staring at him like that. “I don’t know when it started. I’ve found you attractive for a while. That’s all I can say.”

“Well, I would love it if you could pin me down and f*ck me like you mean it. Show me exactly what you’ve fantasized about,” Dazai whispered in Chuuya’s ear. The ginger groaned and picked up Dazai easily, carrying him to the bedroom.

“Don’t mind if I do, brat.”

Notes:

There will be no chapter next week because I’ll be on vacation and unable to post

Chapter 17 Chapter Text

Chuuya laid Dazai on the bed and got on top of him, their mouths smashed together. Their tongues were sliding together in a wet heat that made both of them groan. Chuuya put his hands under Dazai’s shirt, clawing at his chest. Dazai whimpered, squirming and trying to deepen the kiss more. His tail wrapped around Chuuya’s hips.

“f*ck. I’ve wanted to do this to you for so long,” Chuuya growled. Dazai whined as the kiss was broken. His long legs wrapped around Chuuya. Those big brown eyes were almost black with how far his pupils had dilated.

“Hurry it up! Chibi is so slow,” Dazai whined. Chuuya rolled his eyes but took off Dazai's shirt. He hurriedly undid the bandages on the man’s neck and chest, watching them unravel around him like he was unpacking a gift. He latched onto the man’s neck, sucking and nipping on it. Dazai gasped and squirmed. Chuuya smirked. He was sensitive here. “Ch-Chuuya, stop teasing me.”

“But I don’t want to,” Chuuya whispered. Part of the fun of sex was taking his partner apart and he was eager to do it to this proud man. His teeth sank into Dazai’s neck, making the brunette gasp. He sucked on the skin until a pretty red mark bloomed there. “Such a pretty boy.”

“Shut up,” Dazai growled and clawed at Chuuya’s chest until he managed to get his shirt off. Dazai licked his lips as he admired Chuuya’s body. Chuuya knew he was attractive. He worked out frequently and made sure to take good care of his body. Dazai reached up, cautiously touching his abs. He traced over one of the scars on his body. Chuuya bit his lip and pinned Dazai’s hands to the bed. “Chibi is such a brute.”

“It’s obvious that you like it,” Chuuya whispered as he kissed down to Dazai’s nipples. Dazai gasped and whined as Chuuya sucked on one of them and tweaked the other with his fingers. Dazai’s moans were like music to Chuuya’s ears. He sounded amazing. Chuuya wanted to take him apart. “You’re so f*cking infuriating but I can’t get enough of you.”

“Th-That’s just because you’re-ah!- weird,” Dazai struggled to speak. Chuuya wanted to rob him of any ability to think. He kissed down the man’s stomach until he made it to his pants. He practically ripped them off, making Dazai yelp in surprise. Chuuya grinned as he saw Dazai’s co*ck tenting his underwear. He teasingly rubbed over it with his hand. Dazai bucked his hips up into the touch.

“Have you been f*cked before?” Chuuya whispered as he pulled down Dazai’s underwear, freeing his co*ck. Dazai nodded weakly, his eyes screwed shut. Chuuya sighed. “I mean consensually.”

Dazai took a moment to think before shaking his head no. Chuuya looked away sadly. But he knew he would make this good for Dazai. The bakeneko whined and pawed at Chuuya’s pants. Chuuya smiled at him and pulled down both his pants and underwear, his large co*ck finally being free. He sighed in relief. Dazai was staring at Chuuya’s co*ck, drooling slightly.

“Like what you see?” Chuuya teased and winked. Dazai snapped out of his staring and crossed his arms with a huff.

“As if. I just didn’t expect someone so small to have such a large co*ck,” Dazai huffed, his face red. Chuuya chuckled and caught Dazai’s lips in a kiss. Their tongues entwined and Dazai moaned softly. Chuuya rubbed their co*cks together for a moment before leaning away to grab the lube from his nightstand. Dazai looked at it and tilted his head. “What’s that?”

“It’s lube. It’ll help make this comfortable,” Chuuya explained, feeling a stab of sadness when he realized that Dazai had never been properly prepared for sex. He thoroughly coated his fingers in the substance before gently rubbing one of them around Dazai’s entrance. Dazai bit his lip, a bit of fear entering his eyes. Chuuya knew that his last experience must have been incredibly painful. He very slowly pushed his finger inside. Dazai whined in discomfort. “It’s okay. I promise it’ll feel good soon.”

Dazai closed his eyes, trying to relax his muscles for Chuuya. The redhead slowly started to move his finger in and out and smiled in triumph when Dazai gasped, his eyes shooting open. He immediately prodded at that area again, making Dazai moan and gasp, his body shaking.

“W-What is that?” Dazai asked, his voice shaky. Chuuya smiled and kissed him gently.

“It’s your prostate. It makes you feel good,” Chuuya explained as he targeted that spot with his finger. Dazai was soon reduced to a mewling mess, his body shaking with pleasure. “You like that, baby?”

“Y-Yes. Please. More,” Dazai’s voice was shaky as he begged. Being able to get Dazai to beg sent a new spark of arousal through Chuuya. His co*ck was aching between his legs. He slowly pushed in a second finger and Dazai whimpered at the stretch. Chuuya was mesmerized by the view of his fingers stretching Dazai’s hole. He bit his lip. His co*ck was aching. He reached down and gave it a stroke to take off some of the edge. That caught Dazai’s attention and his tail flicked at Chuuya’s co*ck. Chuuya closed his eyes as the brag wrapped his tail around it.

“f*ck,” Chuuya groaned as he pushed in a third finger. Dazai was teasing Chuuya with the touches of his tail, only giving him the smallest glimpses of pleasure. Well, two can play at that game. As Chuuya moved his three fingers inside, spreading them to properly stretch Dazai, he avoided the man’s prostate. Dazai kept moving his hips down, trying to get Chuuya to nudge against that spot. As if in retaliation, his tail unwrapped from Chuuya’s co*ck. “Such a needy boy. You’re mine, Dazai.”

Dazai whined high in his throat, his eyes clouded by pleasure. Chuuya grinned and pulled out his fingers. He grabbed a condom but before he could roll it on, it was slapped out of his hands by a tail. Dazai was looking up at him, unamused. Chuuya sighed and coated his length in lube. He definitely wasn’t against f*cking Dazai without the condom he just knew the other man was going to be a huge pain when it came to clean up. Dazai was staring at his co*ck with wide eyes as it was lined up with his hole.

“Don’t worry. We’ll make it fit,” Chuuya whispered as he put Dazai’s leg on his shoulder and slowly pushed inside. Dazai’s eyes squeezed shut in pain. Chuuya made sure to go as slow as possible as he pushed his large co*ck inside. He groaned as he bottomed out. Dazai’s breathing was uneven, his eyes wide. “It’s okay. Just relax. Tell me when you’re ready.”

Dazai’s eyes fluttered open. Chuuya gently caressed his cheek and gave him a small kiss. Dazai hesitantly wrapped his legs around Chuuya, pulling him even deeper inside.

“I’m ready,” his eyes were narrowed in determination as he spoke. Chuuya nodded and slowly pulled out and pushed in. He knew he couldn’t start rough, even though his body was begging him to just f*ck Dazai into the bed. His body felt so perfectly tight and hot. Chuuya could tell when he hit Dazai’s prostate. The Bakeneko’s entire body jolted and he let out a startled moan. Chuuya grinned and started to thrust a bit faster. He watched his co*ck move in and out of Dazai’s body.

“f*ck. You feel so good,” Chuuya moaned. He hadn’t gotten laid in so long and having his partner be Dazai. Annoying, needy, secretive Dazai was the best outcome. The man’s head was tossed back, his brown hair fanning out on the bed like a halo.

“N-No wonder chibi hasn’t had sex in a while. Y-You’re so bad,” Dazai taunted, even as his voice shook. Chuuya raised his eyebrows and gripped Dazai’s hips, starting to thrust in earnest. He pounded into Dazai’s tight hole, targeting his prostate. Dazai clawed at the bed, overtaken by moans.

“Yeah. Real bad, huh?” Chuuya taunted, knowing that Dazai couldn’t respond when he was so busy moaning. His grip on Dazai’s hips was bruising and Chuuya was looking forward to seeing the bruises the next day. To fit his fingers over them and press down. He was sure Dazai would shiver at the action. The thrill of knowing Dazai was his now made him move faster. The room was filled with the sounds of their skin slapping together, Dazai’s loud moans, and the occasional grunt or growl from Chuuya. Chuuya’s leaned down to capture Dazai’s mouth. Their kiss was messy, drool slipping between them as they tried to get as close to each other as possible. Chuuya continued to pound against Dazai’s prostate the whole time until Dazai was a quivering mess. Dazai’s moans were swallowed by Chuuya. The man’s body clenched and he moaned as he came untouched. Chuuya grinned and continued to pound into Dazai, admiring how he looked all f*cked out. It didn’t take long for Dazai to start whining in overstimulation. Chuuya gave one last thrust and emptied his seed inside of the taller man, growling against his throat the whole time. He pulled out with a sigh, watching the way his cum dripped out after him. The sight was almost enough to get him hard again.

He picked up Dazai’s limp body and carried him to the bathroom. Dazai whined as he was set in the bathtub, warm water starting to fill up around him. Chuuya knew how important aftercare was and he definitely wasn’t going to neglect it.

“Was it good?” He whispered in Dazai’s ear as he started to clean his stomach. Dazai huffed.

“Chibi’s a brute. As if I would ever like being f*cked by a dog like you,” he pouted. Chuuya couldn’t help but laugh out loud at the declaration. Dazai glared at him and hissed.

“You say that but you’re the one who came without me touching your co*ck,” Chuuya whispered as he pushed two fingers into Dazai to clean him inside. Dazai whined, his legs closing but Chuuya gently pushed them back open. “It’s okay to say it was good.”

“Shut up,” Dazai growled. Chuuya chuckled as he gently cleaned the rest of Dazai’s body. When he got the cat into bed, he curled up behind him, pulling him close to his chest. Chuuya felt warm and content with Dazai in his arms. He knew he could protect him.

Chapter 18 Chapter Text

Chuuya yawned as he woke up and a blush immediately took over his face as he remembered the previous night. He could still hear Dazai’s loud mewls and moans as he f*cked him. The man was still sleeping, his chest rising and falling pleasantly as Chuuya watched. Chuuya admired how beautiful he looked. The sun from outside fell on his hair and ears, making them shine in the light. His ears twitched a bit as he slept and Chuuya fought the urge to pet them. He wanted Dazai to sleep for as long as possible. He knew the man was going to be insufferable when he woke up and would complain about how sore he was. Chuuya bit his lip. Dazai had felt better than any hookup he had ever had. He could already feel himself getting turned on as he thought about the previous night.

He shook his head to get rid of those thoughts. He had to go to work soon and he couldn’t be thinking about Dazai the whole time. He admired the smoothness of the man’s skin and the way his tail flicked as he slept. Dazai’s eyes were screwed shut and he suddenly turned, nuzzling closer to Chuuya’s chest. Chuuya smiled and adjusted his position to let him get as close as possible. Dazai made small noises of contentment as Chuuya gently stroked his ears. He wondered if he left any marks on Dazai. He knew there must be some on his neck and the idea sent a possessive thrill through him. He wanted Dazai all to himself. One of his hands slid down to grip the Bakeneko’s ass, gently squeezing. Dazai made a small noise and pressed back into the touch. Chuuya bit his lip. He fought back the urge to wake Dazai up and f*ck him right there, to hear those wonderful noises again and listen to him mewl. A deeper, darker part of him growled to possess Dazai. To make him completely his. But he refused. He wouldn’t use the other man like other people have.

He gently scratched at Dazai’s head, smiling as he heard the soft purr. Chuuya felt a bit nervous about when Dazai would wake up. Would things be different between them? Would Dazai be upset? Would he want to leave? He knew those thoughts were irrational but he had never had a relationship before. The mafia kept him far too busy. The most he had were short flings. He never had someone he wanted to keep as his boyfriend. But now he did. He needed to sort through these new emotions. The worry still stirred in his gut. He didn’t want Dazai to act differently. He liked Dazai in all his insufferable ways. He liked that the other man was willing to stand up to him and even yell at him. He didn’t want Dazai to lose that spitfire nature of his. He sighed softly, ruffling Dazai’s ears a bit. He was thinking so much. He was too used to people changing themselves in order to appease him. Dazai wasn’t that kind of person. Ever since they first actually talked, Dazai had been willing to confront him. Being in a relationship wouldn’t change that. He hoped it would mean they would communicate more effectively. That Dazai wouldn’t hide things anymore.

He still had to deal with the Mori situation. He knew his boss. Mori wasn’t the type to back down when he found something he wanted. But Chuuya was also a valuable asset to him. He was one of his top executives. Mori would have to tread a fine line if he wanted to get Dazai while keeping Chuuya around. Chuuya still hadn’t sorted out what he would do if Mori tried anything. He was loyal to his boss. The man had given him a home and a purpose. But now he had Dazai. Dazai was special to him.

Dazai nuzzled closer again, purring when Chuuya scratched him in the right spot. Chuuya never expected that picking up a cat off the street would lead to this. He felt warm and content. Dazai’s entire body was clinging to him, long legs wrapped around his smaller ones. It was as if he had a pet koala.

“Chuuya,” Dazai’s voice startled the man. He looked down at him but the Bakeneko’s eyes were still closed and his breathing was still even. He whined a bit, nuzzling against Chuuya’s neck and making him shiver. He gasped when the man started to mouth at his neck. He bit his lip as the taller man’s warm mouth kissed and sucked on his neck. He gripped Dazai’s hips and groaned. Dazai’s ears twitched and his eyes blinked open. He looked around in confusion for a moment before realization dawned on his face and he scooted out of Chuuya’s embrace.

“Morning, bastard,” Chuuya huffed. He reached up to rub the place where the cat had mouthed at. Dazai pouted and looked away, his tail lashing from side to side.

“Is that any way to greet your boyfriend?” He asked, his eyebrow raised. Chuuya opened his mouth but Dazai pushed him down on the bed and nuzzled against his neck. “Were you just watching me sleep? Weirdo chibi.”

“Shut the f*ck up. You’re the one who was getting as close as f*cking possible and mouthing at my neck like a bitch in heat,” Chuuya growled. Dazai blushed a bit at the comment, biting his lip. He mouthed more at the sensitive spot on Chuuya’s neck.

“Why don’t you f*ck me then? If I’m a bitch in heat, the logical conclusion would be to f*ck me,” Dazai whispered. Chuuya groaned, his co*ck already getting hard but he managed to shake his head and get up. Dazai immediately started giggling and Chuuya reached up, realizing his hair was a complete mess. “Chibi looks so stupid! Finally, your appearance matches your personality.”

“Shut the f*ck up and no, I’m not going to f*ck you. I would love to but I have work,” Chuuya sighed as he stood up and started to find some clothes to wear. Dazai lashed his tail angrily, growling.

“You’re so boring. Just ditch. Stay home and f*ck me,” Dazai complained like a toddler who got told no. Chuuya shook his head and reached out to ruffle the man’s hair. Dazai dipped out of his grasp and stomped into the bathroom. Chuuya knew he was only throwing a fit in the hopes that it would make him stay.

“You know that’s not possible. Me ditching would mean the death of some of my subordinates and Ane-San coming to murder me,” Chuuya called to Dazai. He heard Dazai grumbling and when he walked into the bathroom, he saw him in his cat form, lying in the bath. Chuuya had the urge to turn the water on and let his thoughts win. He turned on the water and Dazai immediately jumped out of the bath, spitting and hissing. Chuuya broke into laughter. “That’s what you get for trying to stop me from taking a bath!”

Dazai turned into his human form and glared down at Chuuya. Chuuya hated their height difference with a passion.

“How dare you try to get my fur wet? Do you know how f*cking long it takes to get dry when you’re covered in fur?” Dazai spit. Chuuya rolled his eyes and put his clothes down on the side.

“Do you want to take a shower with me, you little bastard?” He asked. Dazai’s eyes flitted between many emotions before nodding a bit. His eyes were narrowed like he didn’t want to admit it. Chuuya turned on the water and waited for it to warm up. He saw Dazai looking at him up and down and smirked. “You sure are needy. All it took was one f*ck to get you addicted to my co*ck.”

“Who the hell said I’m addicted? Don’t lie to yourself. As if your puny co*ck could ever satisfy me,” Dazai smirked, his fangs flashing. Chuuya shook his head and grabbed Dazai, pulling their bodies flush together.

“You sure didn’t seem to think that when you were moaning and screaming last night,” he whispered as he caressed Dazai’s cheek. Dazai’s cheeks flushed, his ears twitching atop his head. Chuuya brought his face down to kiss him, their mouths moving slowly against each other. He slowly dipped his tongue inside. The kiss was different from all the ones they shared the night before. It was slow and tender. Chuuya was trying to communicate how grateful he was that nothing had changed between them. He checked the heat of the water again and nodded before stepping inside. Dazai stepped in after him, purring at the warmth of the water.

“You’re really annoying, you know that?” Dazai asked. Chuuya chuckled a bit as he put some body wash on his sponge and started to scrub Dazai down. He knew that he would be done much faster if he hadn’t invited the Bakeneko in with him but he didn’t regret it at all.

“Yeah, I know. You’re even more annoying, you leech,” Chuuya smirked as Dazai immediately tried to scratch at him. The shower devolved into them grabbing and pushing each other around, light-hearted laughter filling the air. It was a miracle that Chuuya got out of the apartment on time.

Chapter 19 Notes:

Smut

Chapter Text

The sound of a pen scratching on paper filled the air as Chuuya worked. He had some paperwork left to do regarding some weapons trades going on. Dazai was hovering over his shoulder, ears twitching on his head as he watched.

“This is so boring!” He whined. Chuuya chuckled a bit and reached out to scratch Dazai behind the ear. Dazai purred and nuzzled into the touch.

“Then go do something else. There’s plenty of video games I have that you haven’t played,” Chuuya pointed out. The Bakeneko had started to take a liking to video games and Chuuya often came home to see him playing them, his brown eyes sparkling with the reflection of the screen. Dazai pouted and Chuuya felt his tail lashing back and forth.

“It’s not fair! I want to spend time with my boyfriend but he’s too busy with work. Don’t you love me anymore?” Dazai looked at him with puppy eyes and Chuuya scoffed. He also wished he didn’t need to deal with this but it was necessary. He knew Dazai was being a brat and trying to get him to stop.

“Of course I do, you idiot. This is something I need to get done. Don’t worry, we’ll have plenty of time soon,” Chuuya whispered soothingly. Dazai only pouted and remained behind Chuuya, his tail whipping angrily. “You’re such a needy brat.”

“The stupid chibi is the one who made me like this,” Dazai huffed. Chuuya chuckled and wrote down a few more things. Dazai started to fidget beside him. He grabbed another pen on the table and poked Chuuya’s cheek with it. The executive didn’t react, continuing to write and try to ignore his lover. Once he realized that tactic wouldn’t work, he started to kiss Chuuya’s neck. He moved to crawl into Chuuya’s lap. Chuuya sighed but allowed him.

Dazai didn’t bother him for a moment as he got comfortable in Chuuya’s lap, his face nuzzling into Chuuya’s neck. Chuuya reached up and gently scratched the hair.

Chapter 20 Chapter Text

Dazai stretched out on the couch, mashing at the buttons on the controller. Chuuya was gone for work, which left Dazai feeling bored and having to fill his time somehow. If he told his younger self that he would be in a warm home, playing games and happily waiting for someone to come home, his younger self would have laughed in his face. He nuzzled into the blanket he had wrapped around himself. It smelled like Chuuya. Chuuya’s unique scent completely filled the penthouse, making Dazai feel safe and calm. He could hardly believe that he had gotten this attached to a human. Despite finding a home, Dazai’s mind was still working a mile a minute, meaning he got bored easily. He huffed as he beat the level and paused the game. At least when Chuuya was around he could annoy him. The man’s reactions always made Dazai smile. The Bakeneko stood up and walked into their room, crawling into the bed and shoving his face into Chuuya’s pillow.

Chuuya’s scent surrounded him. Chuuya smelled like a campfire mixed with cinnamon. It was such a lovely scent. Chuuya’s scent was so calming to Dazai. He wanted his lover back home. He wanted to wrap himself around him and bother him as he cooked. He wished that they could live without Chuuya working. Just the two of them. He was hoping to get a phone so he could text Chuuya while he was at work and continue to bother him. He was sure Chuuya would buy him one. The man was loaded with money. Dazai always felt a chill go through him when he thought of Chuuya working for Mori. It was only a matter of time before everything fell apart. Mori knew about him living with Chuuya. He wouldn't stand for that. Mori was surely planning on ripping them from each other. Chuuya hated when Dazai thought like that but he knew that it was true. He desperately wished it wouldn’t but wishes never worked.

Dazai jolted when he heard some noises. His ears perked up as he listened closely. It was coming from directly outside the penthouse. That was definitely weird. There was no reason for anyone other than him and Chuuya to be on this floor since it belonged to Chuuya. He immediately shifted into his cat form and hurried under the bed. He slapped his tail over his mouth, biting on it to quiet his breathing. He heard the loud sound of the door being forced open. He flinched at the noise but stayed still and quiet as he heard stomping sounds inside the penthouse. He was able to identify three different people. He definitely couldn’t beat three people in a fight. He found himself begging Chuuya to hurry back and help him in his mind. As the steps got closer to the bedroom, he got more and more tense.

When he saw boots entering the room from under the bed, he completely stopped breathing. The closet was shoved open and the person looked inside. The second person walked into the room and started rummaging through all the drawers in the room. Dazai was starting to run out of breath but he didn’t dare breathe. Terror gripped him like a claw. The third person came in and also started to look around. Dazai was grateful that, with the mess they were making, it would be very obvious to Chuuya what happened when he got home. Panic seized him when the third person got on their knees to look into one of the drawers. He bent his head down and happened to look to the side. His eyes immediately lit up.

“I found him!” He called to the other people. Dazai finally took in a breath now that he had been caught. He scurried out from under the bed and out of the bedroom. He heard the pounding sounds of their footsteps as they chased him. But he had nowhere to run. The door was closed and shifting into his human form to open it would take too much time. He tried to lose them by swerving around various objects but they kept pace. Dazai made a wrong decision in trying to cut them off and was scooped into one of their arms. He hissed and screamed loudly, thrashing in the man’s arms but the man didn’t let go, taking all of Dazai’s rage as he spit and clawed and bit. Anger was quickly overtaking his face as Dazai continued to struggle and the cat felt the familiar feeling of fear. Fear of being hurt again. He continued to struggle, claw, and yowl at the man but he kept him in a tight grip.

“Stop f*cking struggling,” the man growled as he threw Dazai into a cage, quickly locking it. Dazai banged against the cage, trying to use his claws to undo it but it was impossible from inside. He was picked up inside the cage and continued flinging himself against the walls of it while yowling. As they walked through the lobby of the apartment, Dazai yowled louder, begging any of the people to help him but no one did. He didn’t stop struggling even when they were away from people, he tried reaching out of the cage to claw his kidnappers but his legs were too short.

He growled and hissed at them, he knew Chuuya would review the security footage and find him. He trusted his lover.

_____________________

Chuuya was covered in bruises as he walked back home. He was exhausted. All of his bruises were a result of having to maneuver in a bad environment. He felt a bit of excitement when he thought about Dazai waiting at home for him. Chuuya noticed that the people that Mori sent to look for Dazai were gone. He felt a bit of dread settle in his gut as he took the stairs, using his ability to float up to the penthouse. Panic ensued when he saw that the door was kicked in. He immediately ran into the penthouse.

“Dazai! Where are you?! Dazai!” He called the man’s name again and again but there was no response. He looked through his entire home but there was no sign of his lover. His entire penthouse was a complete mess. Whoever was here had looked everywhere and thrown his belongings around. The TV was still on, paused on a video game. He felt the stirring of Arahabaki inside of him. That pure, white rage. It would be so easy to give himself over to it. He bit his lip when he found traces of blood in the kitchen. He reminded himself that it may not be Dazai’s. There was no guarantee that it was. Dazai wasn’t the type to sit back and let himself be kidnapped. He probably fought back. The anger inside of him was an all-consuming inferno only cut by his concern.

He walked out onto the balcony, taking in deep breaths of the crisp air as he tried to calm that storm inside him. He couldn’t make proper decisions when he was consumed by anger. He needed to think carefully. Dazai’s life was on the line. He knew it must be Mori. Was he willing to give up his loyalty to Mori and the Port Mafia for Dazai? He would have to give up so much. His fists clenched at his sides. Dazai was his. Mori had no right to take what was his. The voice in his head was gravelly and rough. Arahabaki. He shook his head, trying to get rid of the monster’s influence.

The cold night air helped to quell the heat of rage but it still remained as a fiery anger. He could barely stand the thought of going back into his home. It didn’t feel right without the annoying bastard bothering him. It wasn’t his home. How could he sleep tonight? The answer was that he wouldn’t. He needed to think of a course of action. The one who got Dazai taken was his boss. The man who gave him his current life. What could he do? But he would have to find out. He needed to save Dazai. Dazai belonged here. In their home. He grabbed his phone and called one of his contacts.

“Akutagawa? Come to my place. Bring Atsushi. I know about him,” Chuuya ordered. He heard Akutagawa’s sharp intake of breath.

“W-Why?” The younger man asked. Chuuya sighed.

“Just do it. I promise you aren’t in trouble or anything. Just come here and bring him,” Chuuya’s voice was stern, offering no room for complaints. Akutagawa agreed nervously and the call ended. Chuuya went back into his penthouse, doing his best to clean up some of the mess. He was sure that Atsushi kid would help. Akutagawa may be another story but Chuuya was sure he could convince him somehow. He couldn’t do this alone. He would be going directly against the boss of the port mafia.

Chapter 21 Chapter Text

Dazai never stopped his struggling, banging himself against the walls of the cage. The wires of the cage dug into his flesh and blood spurted out. He barely felt the pain past the pure panic his mind was in. He didn’t want to go back. He wanted Chuuya. Where was Chuuya? He promised to keep him safe. This is what Dazai gets for trusting someone and believing he could have a normal, comfortable life.

It seemed like ages before the cage was placed on solid ground. He continued to bang against it, his tail lashing angrily as he did so. He heard a chuckle that made his blood run cold, fear seizing his limbs. The voice was deep and menacing. One Dazai knew well.

“You’re just as feisty as you used to be,” Mori’s voice was enough to make the cat shake. Gloved hands appeared and unlocked the cage. Despite fighting all this time, Dazai didn’t dare to step out. His entire body was frozen. He shrank back as Mori leaned down to look into the cage, his violet eyes piercing into Dazai and bringing him back to how things used to be before he escaped. Dazai hissed as Mori’s gloved hand reached into the cage. The man grabbed him by the scruff of the neck and dragged him out. Dazai clawed at him but Mori knew to wear long, thick gloves when handling Dazai. Dazai hissed and yowled as he was picked up, Mori looking him in the eyes. His purple eyes glowed red in the low light of the room. “It’s about time you were back.”

Dazai took a look at his surroundings but he saw nothing familiar. This definitely wasn’t Mori’s home. He squirmed in the man’s grip but the doctor gripped his scruff tightly, keeping him suspended in the air. How was Chuuya going to find him? Would he want to find him? Maybe this is exactly what Chuuya wanted to happen.

“Did you enjoy your vacation?” Mori spoke, reaching a hand up to pet Dazai’s cheek. The touch made the cat feel sick. This man had touched him in horrible ways that he couldn’t even begin to describe. Those hands dirtied him and he wanted them nowhere near me.

“Don’t think Chuuya is going to stand for this. He’s one of your best executives,” Dazai spat. Mori chuckled as he set Dazai on the ground. Dazai looked around the room frantically but he couldn’t see an exit. It was a small room. The only things in it were a long operating table, a small bookshelf with various medicines inside, and a sink. He shifted into his human form. He always felt weak when he was in his cat form around Mori. The man could easily stomp him when he was like that. He glared at the older man.

“Chuuya-Kun won’t come for you. I took him in as a boy. I saved him. He is loyal to me,” Mori said, sounding completely sure of himself. Dazai growled lowly, anger overriding anger for now. But a small bit of doubt worked its way into his mind. Would Chuuya come to get him? He knew Chuuya was very loyal and he only knew the man for a short time. If Mori was right and he saved Chuuya, he could imagine his lover abandoning him in favor of his boss. The stab of pain that went through him at that thought startled him. He didn’t think he’d gotten so attached to the short man.

“He’ll come,” Dazai forced confidence into his voice. He knew that if Chuuya didn’t come, he was completely screwed. Mori chuckled and got closer. Dazai instinctively stepped back until he was backed against the wall. Mori grabbed him by the chin.

“You’re back with me. Where you belong. Did you really believe you could stay away? Remember what I’ve taught you, Dazai. Everyone will abandon you. You aren’t worth having around,” Mori whispered, his voice menacing and dripping with manipulation. Dazai’s ears twitched uncomfortably. Mori was right, of course. But Dazai was making progress before this. He was breaking out of that mindset. But now he was right back at the start. He was stupid to think things would be different. Of course, it was doomed to end up like this. He would never find happiness. Happiness didn’t exist for someone like him. Mori’s grip on his chin didn’t leave, his presence stifling to the man. “This is where you’ll stay since you’ve proven that you can’t be trusted in the house.”

Dazai wanted to throw up. He thought about Chuuya. His bright eyes and the way he would yell at him. Chuuya’s yelling was strangely calming to the cat.

____________________

“I’m losing my f*cking mind!”

Chuuya paced around his penthouse. Akutagawa was standing, his arms crossed, while a man with white hair was standing next to him. Chuuya was able to tell that he was the same as the cat he once saw.

“C-Chuuya-San, I understand you’re worried. I am too. B-But standing here talking isn’t going to get him back,” Atsushi’s voice was nervous as he spoke. Chuuya growled. He knew that. But he still didn’t even know where to start.

“You knew Dazai when he was with Mori. Where do you think Mori would take him?” Chuuya demanded, grabbing Atsushi by the front of the shirt. Akutagawa took a step forward like he was planning on protecting the Bakeneko but Atsushi gave him a look and he stopped.

“He wouldn’t take Dazai back to his home. Mori knows about me. He knows that I would be able to lead you there. But I don’t know where he would put Dazai,” Atsushi whined. Chuuya could see the situation frustrated him too. He sighed as he let go of the cat’s shirt. He clenched his fists. His head was pounding with his anger. His Dazai was gone. What belonged to him… That deep voice in Chuuya’s head kept echoing that Dazai was his.

“I’ll go to headquarters. Maybe he’s keeping Dazai in his office,” Chuuya suggested. He knew that it was unlikely but he would rather do anything than just sit here. He took off running, his feet pounding against the floor as he quickly ran to the balcony, throwing himself off. He always found it to be easier to get down this way. He used his ability to gently land on the ground before hurrying to headquarters.

His penthouse was not far from the Port Mafia headquarters. His mind was still conflicted between his loyalty to Mori and his love for Dazai. But that part of him always overpowered any thought of Mori. Mori took what was his. He ran into the main building and ran to the stairs. The elevator would take too damn long. He needed answers now. His feet almost slipped under him as he hurried up the stairs. He needed to find Dazai. An image of his lover scared and shaking entered his mind, making him even more urgent. He knew Dazai wasn’t helpless but his protective instincts always soared over rational thought. As he got to the top floor, he hurried to the only office on it. He shoved the large double doors open, the sound of them slamming against the wall echoing throughout the room. It was completely empty. Chuuya cursed, stomping his foot on the ground. Mori was usually sitting behind that desk, his hands in front of him. That means he was with Dazai, doing god knows what. The idea of the man putting his hands on his lover made him grind his teeth in rage. He stomped out of the office. Now that he knew Dazai wasn’t here, he was completely out of ideas. He didn’t even know where Mori lived so how could he know where else he frequented? He ran straight into someone as he stomped off. He was about to start cursing them out and tell them to get out of the way until he saw who it was. Kouyou had her hands tucked into the sleeves of her kimono.

“What are you doing, stomping around here?” The older woman asked. Chuuya sighed. He could trust Kouyou. But he was in a hurry. But he also had no idea what to do now.

“Mori kidnapped Dazai. I need to find him,” Chuuya explained in the simplest terms he could. Kouyou’s eyes widened a bit but otherwise, she showed no reaction.

“I see. So that’s why you’re running around like a lunatic,” she sighed. One of her hands came out of the sleeve of her kimono. “Tell me the details.”

“While I was working, Mori must have sent some people in to kidnap him. My entire penthouse was a mess and Dazai was nowhere to be found. He TOOK him,” Chuuya growled, his voice dark as he said it. He needed to get him back. Dazai belonged in his arms. Kouyou filled her head.

“You’ve become quite attached to him, haven’t you? What about Mori? He’s our boss. You won’t be able to stay in the Port Mafia and also oppose him,” she pointed out, tapping her long nails together in thought.

“I know that! But I need Dazai. I need him with me. And I won’t let Mori hurt him anymore,” he declared, his decision sealed. He was willing to betray Mori if it meant protecting his lover.

Chapter 22 Chapter Text

Atsushi’s paws padded on the ground as he finally reached Mori’s home. He looked in through the windows. He was very familiar with the layout of the home. He remembered when Dazai was trapped inside. The two of them would often talk by the window and Atsushi would feel useless since he had no way to help the other cat. He would paw at the window, meowing when Dazai wasn’t there. He knew now that during those times, he was with Mori. He shook his head, trying to clear it of those terrible thoughts. He looked in each of the windows but he didn’t see any sign of life. No one was inside. He growled softly to himself. He was hoping to have good news to bring back to Chuuya. The man was obviously on edge at all times. Atsushi was glad that Dazai found someone who truly cared about him.

He sighed as he realized his excursion brought nothing. He trudged on, his tail dragging against the ground. Worry was deep in his stomach. He knew the terrible things Mori did to Dazai and he couldn’t even begin to imagine what he might do after Dazai escaped from his grasp once.

When he arrived at the massive apartment building, he stared up in awe. He had been here multiple times before but it always astounded him how one man could have the entire top floor of this huge building. He walked into the building and saw Chuuya and Akutagawa waiting for him. They quickly took him to the elevator and they all got inside. Once the door fully closed, he turned into his human form. His disappointment must have been clear on his face because Chuuya immediately clenched his fists.

“I didn’t see anyone in the home,” he whispered. Chuuya growled softly and Atsushi prepared himself to be hit but it didn’t come. Chuuya was glaring at the wall of the elevator.

“I need to find him. He must be so scared. What if he’s hurt?” Chuuya whispered. Atsushi wanted to reassure him but he didn’t know how the man would respond. He didn’t know Chuuya well enough. Akutagawa didn’t look all that bothered as he hummed in thought.

“I don’t know where else he would take him. Are you sure you want to go against the boss?” Akutagawa asked. Chuuya’s eyes flashed with rage and he glared up at the younger man.

“Yes and if you side with him I won’t hesitate to take you down along with him,” his voice was a guttural growl. A warning. Atsushi could tell that the man was being honest with that threat. Akutagawa’s eyes were steely as he looked at his superior.

“What do you plan to do then? Are you going to kill him? What about the Port Mafia? There are a lot of things that need to be considered,” Akutagawa asked. Chuuya’s anger was clear on his face but there was also a mix of other complicated feelings.

“If I have to kill him I will. If he refuses to give Dazai back to me I’ll kill him. The Port Mafia isn’t so weak as to collapse as soon as the leader dies,” Chuuya rolls his eyes at the idea. Akutagawa sighs and shakes his head.

“Who would be the new leader?” Akutagawa asked. Chuuya looked up with wide eyes. He hadn't thought of that. “Will it be you?”

“What? Hell no I’m not going to sit in that office all day doing paperwork and ordering everyone else around,” Chuuya scoffs as if the idea is ridiculous.

“Then who will?” Akutagawa demands. The tension is high in the air as the door to the elevator opens and they enter the penthouse. Atsushi looks between the two men nervously. He half expects a fight to break out.

“I don’t know. I’ll figure it out. If Mori has any sense, he will willingly hand Dazai over to me,” Chuuya growls as he stalks into his bedroom. Atsushi walks to Akutagawa and squeezes his hand.

“What do you think he should do?” He asked his lover. Akutagawa sighed.

“I would say to let Mori have him but I know that if the boss had you, I would be reacting in the same way. Chuuya-San isn’t going to listen. I know he won’t be able to keep his temper in check. Mori-San is going to die,” Akutagawa says seriously. Atsushi leaned against his lover. He knew Akutagawa was hiding just how worried he was about everything.

________________________

Dazai was a wreck on the floor. His entire body felt like it was on fire. He had no idea what was injected into him. He never knew. But it hurt. It hurt like hell. His body was convulsing uncontrollably.

“I see. I could use this if I do some tweaking to it,” Mori muttered to himself at the medical table after observing Dazai for a moment. Dazai was in his cat form. Maybe Chuuya wasn’t coming to get him after all. He couldn’t blame the man. “Do you feel anything other than pain?”

Dazai didn’t answer. He refused to give Mori the research he wanted. Mori didn’t care. He continued writing in a notebook he kept. Dazai did what he did best in these situations. He dissociated. He thought about warmth. Of Chuuya’s strong arms holding him and petting his fur. The pain was still there but it was dulled once he was fully immersed in his mind. He could still smell Chuuya. Chuuya’s warm smell reminded him of safety. But he may never smell that again. Chuuya was probably lying about wanting him around so he gave him away as soon as he could. He felt tears prick at his eyes but he refused to let them fall. He knew this would happen. He struggled to his feet, trying to think past the pain. He never was one to go down without a fight.

He crawled closer to where Mori was before bunching his legs and leaping. His claws raked against the man’s face, spilling fresh blood down his face. The feeling of flesh ripping under his claws was cathartic. Mori growled and Dazai fought past the instinctual fear he had instilled in him as a kitten. He tried to scratch him again but Mori grabbed him by the scruff and violently threw him into the small cage and locked him in.

“Bad. You stay in there. No food for you. Your vacation has made you even worse than you used to be,” Mori snarled. Dazai wanted to retort that it wasn’t a vacation. It was his life. The doctor walked away and the pain of whatever got injected into him seized Dazai again. He convulsed on the floor of the tiny cage. He was feeling claustrophobic with the walls so close. Mori often locked him in this cage when he was younger because he knew how much it made him uncomfortable. Once the pain receded, Dazai stared through the bars of the cage. He was so tired. He was sure it was night by now.

He wanted to be in Chuuya’s huge bed and make fun of him by saying that there was no need for such a big bed when he was so short. He curled up, his tail wrapped around him. He felt the tears pricking at his eyes. Chuuya wasn’t coming back for him. He needed to get used to this again. The pain of being experimented on. The pain of being alone and knowing no one was coming to help you. It was an unimaginable pain. He bit his tail, one of his old coping mechanisms.

The tears started to fall as he stayed curled up. He never cried. He was being weak. He knew this was coming. But it still hurts so much. His teeth sank deeper into his tail until he tasted the metallic tang of his blood. He fell asleep with tears soaking his fur.

________________________

Chuuya paced around his penthouse restlessly. It was almost one in the morning. Atsushi and Akutagawa were camping out on his couch. Akutagawa was already asleep but Atsushi seemed unable to sleep. The man stood up and approached Chuuya. He could see the concern in the younger man’s eyes. He hated it. They didn’t need to be concerned about him. Dazai was the one in danger.

“I know you’re worried, Chuuya-San but it won’t help Dazai-San if you’re too tired to do anything tomorrow,” Atsushi said, his voice soft. Chuuya growled. He knew that was true but he couldn’t fall asleep. He was too used to the lanky bastard wrapping around him as they slept.

“I just can’t. I know he’s scared and hurting wherever he is. I need to get him home,” Chuuya huffed. The possessiveness he felt towards the other man was something he wouldn’t bring up. He didn’t want to alarm Atsushi.

“I’m sorry he isn’t here. We’ll do whatever we can to find him. Do you know anyone that Mori is close to?” Atsushi asked. Chuuya resumed his pacing.

“That’s the problem. Mori doesn’t keep anyone close to him. He’s a lone wolf,” Chuuya growled in frustration, clawing at his hair. He couldn’t relax like this. He needed Dazai’s annoying voice to fill the penthouse and tease him.

Chapter 23 Notes:

TW: torture and graphic descriptions of violence

Chapter Text

Chuuya paced his penthouse as he did research on his phone. Kouyou had agreed to do some as well. He was searching for any properties Mori may own. Akutagawa was also reluctantly looking into it. Chuuya could tell the younger man was still unsure about what Chuuya was doing but his respect for him outweighed his other feelings. A call from Kouyou made Chuuya jump in shock. The loud sound of his ringtone piercing the quiet air startled him. He quickly answered the phone.

“I got into Mori-Dono’s records. He does own some properties. I’ll send you the addresses for all of them. There are eleven of them,” Kouyou explained. Chuuya hummed in acknowledgment. He would have to search up to eleven different properties. Why couldn’t Mori make this simple for him? As soon as the text came in, Chuuya looked over the list of addresses. Almost all of them were in Yokohama and the ones that weren’t were in different countries. He could only hope that Mori didn’t fly Dazai somewhere. He hurriedly ran out of his penthouse and jumped on his motorcycle. The wind flowing through his clothes helped to steady his rapidly beating heart but he knew he wouldn’t be fully calm until Dazai was safe in his arms. He decided to go down the list in order and hope Dazai was in one of the first ones. He would need to do a deep search of all of the buildings.

Chuuya skidded to a stop in front of the first address. It was a small safe house. He slowly approached and listened from outside. He heard nothing. He carefully picked the lock and entered. The entire building was covered in dust. It was clear that no one had been here in a long time. He was about to turn around and leave when he thought, but what if Dazai was in here? He sighed and started to search. Luckily, it was a very small home. He searched through every cabinet, and room, and felt along the walls for any hidden rooms. But he found nothing.

_______________________

Dazai was biting his lip so hard it bled. He refused to scream as the scalpel dug into his body. He wouldn’t give in to the pain and the terror. He continued to glare at Mori as the man dug into him. Dazai was used to this. To this pain and being used as a way to experiment. The drugs in his system from the IV kept him awake and conscious.

“How does this feel?” The man asked as he dug the scalpel into a cut on his arm, scraping along the exposed bone. Dazai spit at Mori, his tail lashing under him. Mori didn’t even flinch as the spit hit him. Dazai growled loudly. “You’re far too feisty. Chuuya-San really did make you worse. So tell me, Dazai. How many times did you two f*ck?”

Dazai curled his lip in disgust. He never wanted to talk to Mori about that. His experiences with Chuuya were pleasant and amazing. Nothing like his experiences with Mori. Mori chuckled a bit at his expression. Dazai bared his teeth and hissed.

“So feisty. Chuuya-San is very valuable to me. He’s endlessly loyal and powerful. It’s no wonder you became attached. His heart gets in the way of his power sometimes. I’m sure he took good care of you. But you aren’t meant for a life like that. This is what you’re meant for,” Mori whispered. Dazai knew that. Of course, he knew that. He lived his entire life not being happy and going from one bad situation to another. He wasn’t expecting anything else. But he had hoped Chuuya was different. But he knew that the other man wasn’t coming for him. He was loyal to Mori. He wouldn’t save him. “What did you do to manipulate him? Did you try and appear small and pitiful? Or did you appeal to his pride and praise him?”

Dazai rolled his eyes. He did none of those things. He already was pitiful so he didn’t need to try and appear like that. He constantly annoyed the smaller man and loved getting him riled up so he never used his pride. Mori’s wicked smirk sent shivers through Dazai. That face often appeared in his nightmares.

“I’m surprised he kept you around for so long,” the doctor whispered as he brought out another tool. Surgical scissors. “Your ears are very cute but you don’t need them, do you?”

Dazai froze in fear as Mori put his left ear between the blades of the surgical scissors. He could hear the blood pounding through his body as fear overtook him.

_____________________

Chuuya was on the sixth property Kouyou sent him. He was growing more and more pessimistic with each safe house he searched. As he reached the door of the house, he found he couldn’t care less about how much noise he made. He kicked down the door with ease and stepped inside. His hopes soared when he saw that this house actually looked used. It wasn’t as dusty.

“Who’s there?” Mori’s voice was easily distinguishable. Chuuya immediately hurried to where the voice was coming from only to be blocked by Elise. Her body was glowing blue, showing that she was prepared for battle. Chuuya pushed her aside but she tried to stab him with her syringe. Fighting her was easy other than that he was used to fighting opponents that were bigger than him.

When he finally made it into the room, he saw Dazai strapped to a table. He was bleeding. Mori had one of his ears between the blades of a pair of scissors. Chuuya’s body was filled with pure, unbridled rage. Mori gave him a smile.

“Ah, Chuuya-Kun. Why are you here?” He asked as if he didn’t know. Chuuya didn’t think. He lunged at the older man and quickly got him on the ground. He amplified gravity on his foot and slammed into the man’s face again and again until all that was left was a gory mess. Even when he knew Mori was dead, he couldn’t stop. He continued stomping on the corpse. Blood completely soaked his pants and into his skin but he didn’t care. All he could feel was rage as he continued. He didn’t see the man who took him off the streets and gave him a place to belong. He only saw the man who took what belonged to him. He didn’t even register the feral-sounding growls he was making as he stomped on the corpse over and over.

There was nothing distinguishable anymore. Even his white lab coat was completely soaked in red. What brought him out of that rage was the soft whimper he heard. He whipped his head around and saw Dazai. The man was still strapped to the table and Chuuya saw the blood on him. He slowly turned to the table. He felt sluggish now that all that rage had drained from him. He reached for Dazai but the man whimpered and tried to squirm away. Chuuya looked down at himself and saw what a mess he had become. He was covered in blood and chunks of flesh. He took some steps back as he looked at himself in horror. What did he do? He completely lost control of himself. Of course, Dazai would be scared of him. He just proved what a monster he was.

“Chuuya… Are you back?” Dazai asked, his voice soft. Chuuya looked at him and nodded. Dazai relaxed. “Can you get me out of these restraints and help with my injuries? I’m fine with being tied up just not in this context.”

Chuuya rolled his eyes and got closer. The restraints needed a key. He first checked all the surroundings but couldn’t find anything. He wrinkled his nose as he crouched down to search the corpse. In one of the man’s blood-soaked pockets, he found it. He unlocked the restraints and immediately pulled Dazai into his arms. He knew the blood would get on the other man, but he didn’t care. He just wanted to hold his boyfriend. Dazai wrapped his arms around him and buried his face in Chuuya’s auburn locks. Chuuya couldn’t hold in the tears and they fell steadily down his cheeks, making lines in the blood smeared there. He should be the one comforting Dazai god damn it. But he had worked so hard to keep that savage, relentless part of him locked away and now he got let out and Dazai would probably always feel a bit of fear towards him.

“Chibi… I wanna go home,” Dazai whispered. Chuuya nodded. Home. Yeah, he could get them home. He quickly covered Dazai’s wounds with some bandages he brought with him just in case.

“I’ll fully take care of your injuries at home,” he said before scooping Dazai into his arms and carrying him out of the safe house. He didn’t care about the corpse of his former boss in the house.

Chapter 24 Chapter Text

The entire ride home, Dazai’s arms were like a vice around him. The man was holding on as tight as possible. Chuuya had imagined their first motorcycle ride together to be something more romantic. Chuuya came to a stop outside the apartment building. He tried to get up but Dazai was refusing to let go.

“Osamu, it’s okay. I’m not leaving you. I’m gonna pick you up and take you to our home,” Chuuya whispered reassuringly. Dazai’s grip slackened and Chuuya was able to get the man into his arms. It was then that he noticed just how much the man was shaking. His entire body was racked with shivers. Chuuya used his ability to float up to the penthouse. He saw Atsushi was already waiting there. When he saw Dazai, he immediately ran to where Chuuya landed.

“Dazai-San! I’m so glad you’re okay!” The younger man said. Dazai didn’t respond. His eyes were still wide with terror. Atsushi didn’t look bothered and kept smiling as Chuuya took his lover inside.

“Atsushi, there’s a big box of medical supplies under the sink in my bathroom. Bring it here. Akutagawa, get me a glass of water for him,” Chuuya demanded as he set Dazai down on the couch. Dazai’s grip on him was so strong that he had no chance of going anywhere. Atsushi immediately ran to follow the order but Akutagawa seemed to hesitate for a moment. He came to his senses when Chuuya glared at him. Chuuya was gently petting Dazai’s hair when Atsushi returned. His mind was filled with images of what may have happened if he was just a minute later. Would Dazai have lost his ear? He opened the box and took out the disinfectant. “This is going to sting, Osamu. You can squeeze me as tight as you need.”

Dazai didn’t respond to the words. He only held Chuuya’s hand. Chuuya poured some of the disinfectant on one of Dazai’s wounds and the Bakeneko immediately hissed in pain, his ears pressed against his head. Chuuya hated seeing the other man in so much pain but he knew this had to be done. Akutagawa returned with the water and Chuuya lifted the top to Dazai’s mouth. Dazai eagerly gulped down the water as Chuuya held the bottle for him. He drank half the bottle in one go before pulling away to breathe.

“You’re doing good,” Chuuya whispered as he wrapped the injury in bandages. He repeated the process with the other injuries. Chuuya could tell that most of them weren’t for research. They were a punishment. A punishment for Dazai escaping Mori. Akutagawa was standing while staring at them. Chuuya could tell the younger man had something he wanted to say. He raised an eyebrow at him.

“What happened to Mori?” Akutagawa asked. Atsushi looked between Chuuya and Akutagawa with wide eyes, afraid that a fight would break out. Chuuya sighed as he continued to treat Dazai’s injuries.

“He’s dead, Akutagawa. I warned you he would be,” He said. He didn’t feel guilty for what he did. He would do it again in a heartbeat. But he knew it was an impulsive decision. It would have lasting consequences. Akutagawa was silent for several moments before he finally spoke.

“Do you realize what a mess everything will become?” Akutagawa’s voice was low and angry. Chuuya looked back at the younger man with cool eyes.

“I know. I would do it again. I’m sure you would do the same,” Chuuya said calmly as he looked at Atsushi. Atsushi was still looking between the two of them, judging when he might have to jump in. Akutagawa’s fists were clenched at his sides but he respected Chuuya. Chuuya was the one who brought him into the mafia. He gave him a place to belong. But he didn’t agree with what his mentor had done.

“You don’t usually act like this, Chuuya-San,” Akutagawa said, trying to calm himself. Chuuya scoffed and rolled his eyes.

“You didn’t know me when I was younger. Dazai brings out a different side of me,” Chuuya explained. He was extremely protective of the other man and he was sure he would continue to be protective. He gave Dazai a kiss on the cheek and the Bakeneko nuzzled against his neck. “I won’t let anyone hurt him. Mori got what was coming to him.”

“I understand you care for him, Chuuya-San but the Port Mafia may fall apart. Mori-San kept the organization together. What are we going to do now?” Akutagawa asked the important questions. But Chuuya didn’t care. He was only glad to have his lover back with him. Dazai was still shaking, his eyes wide as he looked at Akutagawa.

“Akutagawa, be quiet for a bit,” Chuuya ordered as he pulled the taller man into his lap. Akutagawa growled softly at being ignored. He looked ready to attack Chuuya and demand answers but Atsushi stepped in, grabbing him by the arm.

“Ryuu, it’s been a long day. Chuuya-San has been on edge for so long. I know you’re worried about the mafia but just give them time. I’m sure Chuuya-San will be fine with questions in a little while,” Atsushi whispered as he held his lover’s hand. Akutagawa sighed, the anger slowly leaving him. He looked at Chuuya cradling Dazai. He was so used to Chuuya being a force of destruction that it was almost comical seeing him so gentle. He trusted his mentor. Atsushi was right. Chuuya would answer his questions soon.

“I’ll be back tomorrow,” he announced and left the penthouse with Atsushi. Chuuya sighed in relief as the door closed behind them. Dazai was finally starting to calm down, his nose buried in Chuuya’s neck to breathe in his scent.

“I’m sorry it took me so long to find you,” he whispered to the Bakeneko. Dazai hummed and gently nipped Chuuya’s neck.

“I was scared,” he whispered. Chuuya looked at Dazai with concern. The other man rarely talked about his feelings so hearing him bring up his emotions was shocking. “I didn’t know whether you would come for me or not. I thought you would be better off leaving me to Mori.”

“I would never. You’re mine, Osamu. You’ll always have me,” Chuuya whispered. Dazai’s soft ears flicked against Chuuya’s face. “I couldn’t sleep without you. I’m so used to you getting close but somehow also stealing the blankets.”

A small smile graced Dazai’s face at the comment. He kissed Chuuya’s neck gently.

“Do you know what you’re going to do?” Dazai’s voice was nervous. “That was pretty dumb of you. Do you always just charge in and kill?”

“Shut up. No, I don’t. It was a very emotional situation. I couldn’t hold back my anger,” Chuuya could still feel the enraged roar of Arahabaki overtaking him. Despite that, he still didn’t regret his decision to kill the man. After what he did to his Dazai, he deserved an even more painful death. “I… Don’t actually know what I’ll do now. Mori was the leader of the port mafia. He was the most important person in the organization. It’ll fall apart if I don’t do something.”

“I think you know what you have to do, you just don’t want to do it,” Dazai whispered. Chuuya knew what he was implying. That he needed to become the leader. He was sure Kouyou would lie for him and say that Mori made him leader. The problem was that Chuuya wasn’t built for that. He wasn’t the type to sit comfortably in an office while his people fought and did all the hard work. He wasn’t Mori. Dazai saw the conflicted look on his face and cupped his cheek. “You used to be a leader, weren’t you?”

“H-How do you know that?” Chuuya stuttered, blue eyes wide. Dazai grinned like a cat that got the cream.

“What do you think I would do when you were at work all day? I snooped. I found some writings you did. Talking about the sheep. You were a leader. You could do it again,” Dazai said as he nuzzled closer to Chuuya’s warmth. Chuuya scoffed.

“Yeah and look how that turned out. Being a leader once proved that I wasn’t set out for it. I can’t be like Mori. I can’t fill his shoes,” Chuuya sighed. It seemed like such an impossible task for him. Dazai rolled his eyes, his tail flicking irritably.

“No one is asking you to be just like Mori. There are multiple ways to be a leader,” he said. Chuuya knew that. But he still was unsure. All he had been thinking about was getting Dazai back. He never once considered what would happen after.

“I’ll figure it out eventually. For now, I just want to be with you,” Chuuya whispered as he pulled Dazai in for a deep kiss. Dazai melted into it, purring loudly as he wrapped his arms around the other man. As Chuuya gripped the man’s waist, he felt like he was right where he was meant to be.

Chapter 25 Chapter Text

Dazai’s face was buried in Chuuya’s chest. The room was filled with the sounds of his loud purrs. They were deafening. The world was reduced to this room, just the two of them enjoying each other’s company. Dazai’s ears were twitching against Chuuya’s face. The warmth of Chuuya’s body was a soothing balm that eased Dazai’s fears and awful experiences.

“You’re so warm,” he whispered against Chuuya’s neck, his voice muffled. He found solace in the warmth Chuuya gave him. It was unlike any warmth he had experienced before. Chuuya chuckled softly.

“My old friends used to hate it. We would all have to sleep together and during the summer it would get so hot that everyone complained that I made it unbearable. I would sleep somewhere else to not bother them during the Summer,” Chuuya chuckled as he reminisced about the sheep. Despite the fact that they betrayed him, he still looked back at those times fondly. It was the only time he was allowed to truly be a kid. Dazai looked up at him, his ears twitching.

“Why did you stay with them at all?” He asked. Chuuya sighed. He never talked about the sheep because it was still a sore subject for him. Even after all these years, the stab of betrayal ached like a gaping wound.

“Because they took me in. I… I’m not a normal person, Osamu. I don’t even know if I’m human. I was on the streets and the sheep took me in. I wanted to give back to them,” Chuuya explained. Dazai nodded, nuzzling against Chuuya.

“I can’t see how anyone who isn’t human could be as insufferable as you so I know you’re human,” Dazai whispered. Chuuya was tempted to push him off of him for that comment but the embrace they shared felt far too good. He didn’t want to let go of what was his.

“Shut up, you bastard,” he settled on growling. Dazai only giggled. Chuuya was grateful to see the cat starting to get some of his spark back. He had been so scared and skittish since he was brought home but now he was finally acting like the old Dazai.

Chuuya’s mind was still plagued with what to do now. He hadn’t gone to the port mafia headquarters since he killed Mori. He was sure it was a complete mess by now. As if on cue, there was a knock on the door. Chuuya shook his head, only holding Dazai tighter. He didn’t want to get out of bed. There was more knocking.

“Chuuya, if you don’t open this door,” Kouyou’s voice was full of anger and a promise to break down the door. Chuuya sighed and forced himself to his feet. He trudged over to the door as if it was the hardest thing he had ever done. He opened the door to see the older woman. She had her arms crossed, looking unamused. He fully opened the door to allow her inside. She walked in with swift steps. “Why have you been ignoring my messages?”

“I have?” He asked. He reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone. Fifty-five texts and twenty calls. sh*t. He had silenced his phone since he didn’t want Dazai to be startled by noises while they were relaxing. “Sorry, Ane-San. I wasn’t paying attention.”

“That isn’t good enough and you know it. Do you have any idea what a mess it is out there? Everyone is fighting for who will be the new leader and nothing is getting done. People are dying left and right,” she exclaimed. Despite the seriousness of the news, Chuuya couldn’t care less.

“Let them fight. Who cares?” He said. Kouyou clenched her fists, pink eyes narrowed to slits.

“Chuuya, you can’t just lock yourself in here forever. You have a job and responsibilities. You’re the one who killed Mori-Dono. I understand why you did it but you need to take responsibility for your actions,” Kouyou snarled. Her voice reminded him of how she would talk to traitors. He felt a surge of defensiveness swell in his chest but he respected Kouyou too much to let it out. “People are dying, Chuuya.”

In response to all the noise, Dazai cautiously came out of their room. His eyes darted between Chuuya and Kouyou. Kouyou’s eyes landed on him and she rolled them.

“This is what you ruined the Port mafia for?” She asked. Chuuya immediately walked to stand in front of his lover.

“Don’t talk about him like that,” he snarled. His voice dripped with anger and disdain. That awful force inside him reared its head. He would never be this rude to Kouyou usually.

“Chuuya. You need to take responsibility for your actions. You’re the best choice to lead the port mafia,” Kouyou whispered. Chuuya looked at the ground. He knew that’s what the woman came to talk to him about. But he couldn’t. He wasn’t meant to be a leader like that.

“So, you’re saying the murderer of the last leader needs to be the new one?” He hissed. Kouyou sighed, crossing her arms again. He was used to that look of disappointment on her face now.

“Whoever becomes the next leader will have Mori’s documents. They will see that there’s a connection between you and Dazai. You’ll be hunted down and killed if you don’t take the position,” Kouyou whispered as if the words would break apart if she didn’t say them carefully. Dazai gripped Chuuya’s arm tightly. “You need to stop being childish.”

“Childish?! You think I’m being childish?! I’ve had my entire life taken from me multiple times. You think I care anymore about dying?!” Chuuya yelled. Kouyou took a step back in shock. Chuuya had never yelled at her before.

Dazai, still holding onto Chuuya's arm, felt the tension in the room escalate. The weight of responsibilities and the impending threat loomed over them. Despite his playful nature, Dazai sensed Chuuya's inner turmoil and clung to him for support.
"I understand the pain you've endured, Chuuya, but running away won't solve anything. We need stability, and you're the key to achieving it. You can't let Mori's death be in vain,” Kouyou, unyielding, met Chuuya's intense gaze.
Chuuya's fists clenched, and he took a deep breath, struggling to contain his emotions. Dazai could feel the conflict within him, torn between the desire for a peaceful life with Dazai and the weight of his past in the Port Mafia.

“Are you scared of the future? Is that what this is about? Or do you just not want to be a leader?” Kouyou asked. Dazai looked down at Chuuya. There was concern in both his and Kouyou’s eyes.

“It’s not fear. Of course, it’s not. I wasn’t thinking when I killed Mori. I was overcome with a feeling of pure rage that I couldn’t contain. I needed to protect Dazai. You just don’t understand. I can’t be a leader. You saw how it ended with the sheep,” Chuuya’s voice shook as he spoke. He was gripping Dazai’s shoulder so hard it hurt.

“Chuuya, we don’t have a choice. If someone finds out what you did, it’s not only you who will be hunted. Dazai will be too. Both of you will be on the run for the rest of your lives. Do you want that?” Kouyou’s voice lost the angry edge it had. She sounded soft and gentle. How she usually did when she spoke to Chuuya.

“I… I can’t. I can’t do it. If I can’t even control my emotions enough to not kill the man who gave me a place to belong then how can I lead a massive organization?” Chuuya demanded. Dazai grabbed Chuuya by the shoulders and shook him roughly.

“Chibi! Are you going to keep pitying yourself? Do you regret saving me?” Dazai asked. His brown eyes were narrowed in concentration and focus. The questions snapped Chuuya out of the strange state of mind he was in.

“I’m not pitying myself! Of course, I don’t regret saving you!” He answered.

“Then don’t just give up. She’s right. We can’t run from this. The Port Mafia controls most of Yokohama. We can’t live with it falling apart. I’m not saying you have to agree with everything she wants you to do but at least listen. You’re getting swept up in your self-doubts,” Dazai’s voice was firm, leaving no room for argument.

Chapter 26 Chapter Text

Dazai was curled up in Chuuya’s lap, purring loudly to try and keep him calm. Chuuya was idly scratching Dazai behind the ears. His mind was a complete mess as he desperately tried to sort through his emotions. He knew that the situation with the Port Mafia was getting more and more important the longer he put it off. They needed him.

“Chuuya… The Port Mafia is important. Yokohama will become a war zone if you don’t do something about it,” Dazai whispered. Chuuya took a deep breath. Logically, he knew that. But he didn’t want to. The idea of being a leader again left a bad taste in his mouth. Dazai’s tail swished behind him as he lightly nipped at Chuuya’s throat. “You know I’m right. I want to be able to spend all my time here with you too, but we need to make sure Yokohama stays safe. I think you’ll be a great leader.”

“I… I’ve failed before. The same thing will happen again,” Chuuya whispered. He hadn’t realized how much his childhood failings had affected him. Dazai licked his neck affectionately. “I’m scared, Osamu. I don’t know if I can do this.”

“I know you can. Do you need me to list off all the reasons I think you can lead the Port Mafia?” Dazai asked. Chuuya chuckled and shook his head no. He knew he should listen to the people around him but his feelings and thoughts always drowned them out. He was drowning in the guilt of his past and the uncertainties of the future. He squeezed Dazai close to him, kissing him between the ears. Dazai purred gently. “I’ll be with you through everything. So, consider it. You trust Kouyou. She’s a smart woman, right?”

Chuuya nodded. He knew Kouyou had good ideas. She always did. He sighed. He needed to think about this. But the only boss he worked under was Mori. The man would always sit in his office, going over documents and ordering others around. Chuuya wasn’t suited for that. He couldn’t sit in a stuffy office all day.

“What are you thinking about, chibi?” Dazai whispered. His ears flicked against Chuuya’s face. Chuuya sighed again, burying his face in the man’s fluffy hair.

“My head’s a mess,” he grumbled. Dazai chuckled a bit and nodded. He gently nipped above Chuuya’s choker again.

“Yeah, I can tell. Tell me what’s worrying you,” Dazai’s voice sounded soft but it was clearly a demand.

“Why should I lead? I’m a fighter, not a leader,” Chuuya’s hard-headed nature showed itself. He knew he was being stubborn but he couldn’t imagine himself in the same position Mori was in. It didn’t feel right. Dazai chuckled a bit.

“Being a leader requires strength. It requires you to care for your organization. Those are two things you have plenty of. You’re the only one who could fit the role of leader. Kouyou is a woman. The mafia would never accept her as a leader,” Dazai pointed out.

Dazai continued to purr in Chuuya’s lap, making him feel safe from the chaos of his mind. Chuuya mindlessly rubbed the cat’s back, tracing mindless patterns into it.

“Osamu. I just don’t want to mess it up. Being the leader of the Port Mafia is a ton of responsibility. The sheep were a bunch of street kids. Leading them is nothing compared to what I would need to do to lead the mafia. I couldn’t even lead a group of children. How can I lead a massive organization?” Chuuya asked desperately. If only Mori hadn’t found out about Dazai then none of this would have happened.

“You were a child, Chuuya. Of course, you failed. You didn’t even know who you were. You’ve grown now. You’ve learned from your past. I know you can do this,” Dazai gripped Chuuya’s shoulders so hard it hurt. Dazau’s eyes were steely as he looked into Chuuya’s. Chuuya sighed. The weight of his own history pressed down on him like a rock that was going to sink him into the sea.

Chuuya put his face in Dazai’s chest and Dazai wrapped his arms around Chuuya’s head. Chuuya took deep breaths. Dazai and Kouyou were right. He knew this. He can’t run from this.

“I… I’ll go talk to Kouyou about this. I’ll do it. I know it’s what needs to be done,” Chuuya sighed. Dazai purred louder and kissed Chuuya. Chuuya kissed back and relaxed into the feeling of Dazai’s tongue against his.

They kissed for a long moment before Dazai pulled away and fished Chuuya’s phone out of his pocket. Chuuya didn’t have time to question how he knew what pocket his phone was in. The brunette already pulled up Kouyou’s number. Chuuya took a deep breath before pressing the call button. It only took two rings for the woman to pick up.

“Chuuya? Have you made a decision?” She asked. Chuuya could hear a commotion in the background, a testament to how chaotic things had become.

“Yeah, Kouyou. I need to talk to you. It’s about the Port Mafia,” he said, his voice serious. He heard someone try to talk to Kouyou on the other side but she must have waved them off.

“I’m listening,” Chuuya heard the sound of her gently sitting down, getting ready for a long conversation. Chuuya recounted his conversation with Dazai, his doubts, fears, and the weight of responsibility. Kouyou was silent on the other end as she listened patiently. She waited until Chuuya was done speaking. “Chuuya, leadership is not about being perfect. Mori was far from perfect. It’s about learning from mistakes and facing them head-on, which are things you have done many times. I think you will be a great leader. You can help bring stability to Yokohama. Come to my house. We can talk more once you get here.”

Chuuya nodded even though she couldn’t see and stood up. Dazai and him went into their bedroom and made themselves presentable. Chuuya went out of his way to make sure he looked good. He didn’t want to look messy or unkempt when he might be the leader of the Port Mafia by the end of the day. He knew it was time to confront the impending responsibilities that awaited him.

“You’re doing the right thing, Chuuya. I know you are,” Dazai cupped Chuuya’s face as he said it, his eyes filled with support but Chuuya saw something else there that he couldn’t quite define. There was something off about everything. Chuuya tried to forget that thought as he grabbed Dazai’s hand and made the both of them float down to the ground outside. He took Dazai to his motorcycle and smiled when he felt the man’s arms wrap around him. He was probably just imagining things.

The wind whipped through his hair as he drove. There was something so freeing about riding his motorcycle. Dazai didn’t seem to agree as he squeezed Chuuya as tightly as he could, holding on for dear life. When they arrived at Kouyou’s massive house, the brunette breathed a sigh of relief and he stumbled as he stepped off the vehicle.

Chuuya walked up to the door and took out his key. Kouyou had given him a key as soon as she bought the property, telling him he would always be safe there. As they stepped inside, Dazai observed the lavish decorations in awe. He gripped the man’s hand as he dragged him through the house until he reached the living area. Kouyou was already seated, her hands in her lap, the picture of elegance. She looked up as they approached.

“Welcome. Have you made your decision, Chuuya?” She asked. Her voice betrayed nothing about what she was feeling. Chuuya sat on the couch facing Kouyou and Dazai sat beside him, his tail twitching. “I can assure you that I will be with you throughout everything you go through. I’ll be your loyal supporter and your right-hand woman.”

“I know, Ane-San. It was just hard for me. After being with the Sheep and having them betray me, I don’t know if I’m suited to lead,” Chuuya said, looking away from the older woman. Dazai shot him a look, his eyes narrowed. Chuuya squeezed his hand to try and get him to calm down. Kouyou nodded in understanding.

“I know, Chuuya. You’ve had a very hard life. But your experiences are what is going to make you a perfect leader for the Port Mafia. You already have the respect of the organization. We need a new leader as soon as possible. Everything is already a mess,” Kouyou’s voice was kind but firm as she spoke. Chuuya nodded. He took another deep breath.

“I’ll do it. I’ll be the leader of the Port Mafia,” his voice was firm as he spoke, forcing it to not shake. Kouyou smiled at him, looking pleased. Dazai leaned his head on his shoulder, purring softly. “But I’ll need your help in getting settled into the role and spreading the news.”

“Of course. I’ll get everyone to know that Mori died but willingly gave the position to you,” Kouyou said, her pink eyes seeming to glow in the low light of the room.

Chapter 27 Chapter Text

Chuuya sighed as he finally collapsed on the boss’ chair in the office. He had finally moved all of his things into the room. Kouyou had already been going around, explaining to everyone that Chuuya was the new leader. But he knew it wasn’t that simple. Some of the other executives were angry and unwilling to accept Chuuya as leader. Dazai was looking at him, his tail flicking from side to side. The brunette had been useless when it came to moving his stuff. He had only trailed after Chuuya, saying that he was far too weak and still recovering from his experience with Mori.

Dazai approached and crawled into his lap. It seemed to be his favorite place to be. He buried his nose in Chuuya’s neck, taking in deep breaths of his scent. Chuuya always smelled so good. Chuuya rubbed his back, sighing in relief. The red scarf that the boss always wears is lying on the desk. He knew he should put it on but he still hadn’t fully accepted that he was the new boss. Putting it on would make everything more official. The door opened and Kouyou stepped in. Dazai didn’t move from his spot and the older woman rolled her eyes.

“Everyone is aware. If they aren’t, then they will quickly find out. Everything will return to normal as long as you do your work properly. But, you need to keep a close eye on Ace. He was not at all happy with the news,” Kouyou warned. Chuuya nodded. Dazai was nuzzling against his neck, occasionally licking it. Chuuya knew he was doing it on purpose to get him flustered.

“I will. I never doubted he would be the most annoying to deal with,” Chuuya sighed. Ace never liked him. He saw it as a disgrace that someone so young could make it to executive status.

“Are you going to address everyone soon?” Kouyou asked. Even in the midst of all this chaos, she was still the picture of elegance. You would never guess just by looking at her how much stress she was under. Dazai was purring so loud that he almost couldn’t hear her. He knew it was important to speak to everyone. It would put them at ease and assure them of his power and leadership. He sighed and nodded.

“I’ll do it this evening,” that would give him plenty of time to plan what to say and how to ease people’s fears and doubts. Kouyou nodded. She had a proud look in her eyes. Chuuya often felt like her child or little brother due to how she treated him.

“I’ll make sure everyone is made aware,” she said, bowing before turning and leaving the office. It felt so strange to have her bow to him. He hadn’t fully processed that he was now her superior.

“You’re so f*cking loud,” he huffed. Dazai giggled, continuing to purr. He nuzzled against Chuuya’s neck affectionately. It reminded him of when Dazai was still a cat. He grabbed him by the hair and pulled him away from his neck to kiss him.

Their mouths moved together as if they were meant to. They were made for this. Chuuya’s tongue gently caressed every part of Dazai’s mouth. Dazai purred, the sound rumbling through the kiss. Chuuya squeezed the man’s small hips and Dazai let out a soft moan.

“I-If you don’t stop that, we’ll end up f*cking,” Dazai pulled away from the kiss to say. Chuuya laughed. He was right, of course. Dazai reached behind him and grabbed the red scarf. He gently wrapped it around Chuuya.

“This just doesn’t feel right,” Chuuya huffed. He still didn’t think he was suited for leadership, even though he knew it was what he needed to do. Dazai sighed and gave him a peck on the lips.

“I do. So does Kouyou-San. You trust our judgments, right?” Dazai reminded. Chuuya rolled his eyes.

“Well, I trust Ane-San’s judgment. Not yours,” he teased. Dazai lightly slapped him on the arm. Chuuya broke into a laugh, the tense air disappearing. He stroked Dazai behind the ears, making the brunette purr and nuzzle closer. “You’re mine, Dazai.”

That possessiveness that lived inside of Chuuya reared its head like a great beast. He would make sure Dazai stayed his. His new position as boss would make it easier to keep his lover safe too. He squeezed the taller man and he dramatically wheezed.

“You’re mine too,” Dazai whispered. His voice also had that deep growl of possessiveness in it. Before they could continue talking, there was a knock on the door. Chuuya pushed Dazai under the desk to hide him.

“Come in,” he called out. The door opened and revealed Higuchi. The young woman came up to Chuuya and set down some sheets of paper.

“Hello, boss. These are all the reports about what we’ve done to keep the riots under control. Please look over them when you have the time,” she said. She bowed and left. Chuuya appreciated that Higuchi was straight to the point. She never added unnecessary details. Dazai came out from under the desk.

“We’ve really gotta figure out what to do with your ears and tail if you want to be with me most of the time,” Chuuya sighed as he picked up the papers. He knew Akutagawa was the one organizing most of the riot resistance so it made sense that Higuchi brought him paperwork first. He could already feel a headache coming on as he looked at it. He was made for being out on the field, not this sh*t. After any missions, he always had one of his subordinates fill out the needed paperwork. Dazai saw his dilemma and picked up one of the pages.

“I’ll help. I can read through these quickly and tell you what was in them,” Dazai recommended. Chuuya nodded, feeling relieved. Dazai immediately grabbed the papers and sat back on Chuuya’s lap to read. Chuuya idly read a bit over the man’s shoulder. Dazai was right when he said he would read through it quickly. It took barely a minute for him to read an entire page before flipping to the next. He would occasionally hum and point out something for Chuuya. Chuuya offered him a pen so he could underline everything he found to be most important.

The warmth of Dazai against him made him smile. Once he found a way for the man to hide his ears and tail, he would have Dazai with him everywhere. But he felt like something was off. He couldn’t place it but he knew it. That unsettling feeling in his stomach was there. Something was being hidden from him. Dazai seemed completely oblivious as he continued to read through the reports.

“This Ace guy is really going to be a pain in the ass for you,” Dazai remarked. Chuuya hummed. The reports said that he was one of the major contributors to the riots. He was trying to take the role of boss. Chuuya knew that he would have to get that man to know his place. He was an executive but Mori only made him one due to his money. Chuuya could feel a stress headache about to form.

“Osamu, are you feeling alright?” He asked. He knew there was something going on with him. Dazai tilted his head.

“Hm? What do you mean?” His expression looked so innocent and unassuming that Chuuya almost believed that it was all in his head. But he knew Dazai. The man was a good actor. He sighed and gently squeezed Dazai’s shoulders. He knew that he wouldn’t be able to get the information he wanted.

“Forget it,” he whispered. Forcing Dazai to talk about it would only make him hide it more. The man was incredibly stubborn. “Found anything interesting?”

“Most of it is detailing how the riots formed, people who participated, and potential motives. Akutagawa-Kun put a lot of work into suppressing them. It seems like most of them stem from Ace,” Dazai explained. Chuuya nodded and let out a deep sigh. Already, he was facing problems. He knew that being boss wouldn’t be easy but he at least wanted a little time to get used to the position. “You poor thing. Is it hard sitting there while I do all your work?”

“Shut up,” Chuuya growled. He planted his face on Dazai’s broad shoulder. “I’m just overwhelmed with everything.”

“Poor baby,” Dazai said in the most infuriatingly gentle voice. Chuuya wanted to punch him but held back. Dazai continued to read and tell Chuuya any important information he found. At least, that’s what Chuuya thought he was doing.

He didn’t know just how much Dazai was leaving out.

Chapter 28 Chapter Text

This was the right thing. It was all for a good purpose. He knew that. This was for the good of both of them. He kept repeating those thoughts to himself as he walked through the Port Mafia headquarters, towards people he knew were against his lover. He was wearing a hat that would hide his ears and his tail was tucked into his pants. It was incredibly uncomfortable but he needed to deal with it. Chuuya would do better away from an organization like the Port Mafia. This was for his good.

“You must be the new helper,” a young man approached Dazai. He was tall with pink hair and blue eyes. He had a large collar around his neck with a red gem in the middle. He held out his hand but Dazai didn’t shake it.

“Why are you against the new boss?” Dazai asked. He needed as much information from these people as possible. The young man scoffed.

“The same as everyone else. He’s way too young to be leading. The death of Mori is suspicious. We still aren’t aware of what happened. Kouyou-San said he died in a fight but didn’t give details. I think the new boss may have killed Mori to take the position,” the man said. Dazai hummed and nodded. “What about you? I heard you’ve managed to get close to him.”

“I have. I think he’s way too trusting and kind. He’ll bring the Port Mafia into ruin,” Dazai explained. The man nodded. He looked like he believed in Dazai. He had his first in.

“My name is Akio, by the way. What about you?” The man, Akio, asked. Dazai already had a plan. Giving his real name was a terrible idea because it might get to Chuuya.

“Tsushima Shuji. I hope I can work with you and the rest of the resistance fighters,” Dazai said. His voice stayed completely confident. He knew exactly what to say in any future conversations that would come up. This was what he needed to do. He kept telling himself that over and over.

“Since you managed to get close to him, you’ll be a big help,” Akio said. Dazai nodded even though he had no intention of giving away anything that could lead to Chuuya getting hurt. He just needed to destroy the Port Mafia. Once it was gone, he and Chuuya could live happily together.

“The shipment I talked about will be coming in two hours,” Dazai explained. It was an important one. Chuuya had given him some of the paperwork to look over and he absorbed the information easily. It was a shipment of firearms. All they needed to do was sabotage it. “Do you think I’ll be able to meet with Ace-San?”

“The master isn’t someone who meets with people frequently. You’ll have to prove your worth first. Maybe after this mission, you’ll be able to,” Akio said. Master? Was Ace really so narcissistic? Why was Akio calling him that?

“I see. Do you have an ability?” Dazai asked. He didn’t know exactly who he would be working with but he was sure he could manage to sabotage the shipment no matter who he was with.

“Yes but it’s not a traditional one,” Akio said. Dazai tilted his head and the pink-haired man sighed. “The appearance you see isn’t me. My appearance makes everyone see me as someone I’m not. Someone they want to protect and care for.”

Dazai hummed. That was interesting. He could use Akio to distract the mafia grunts on the ship while everyone else stole the guns.

“How did you get into the mafia?” He asked next. Despite his hatred for the mafia, he knew that most people didn’t join randomly. They all had their reasons. Akio sighed. His blue eyes were locked on the ground as he walked.

“I’m not technically a part of the mafia. I’m just the master’s servant. He found me on the streets and put this collar on me. If I disobey him, he can turn me into a jewel,” Akio explained. Dazai’s eyes widened. He knew Ace had an ability but he didn’t know it would be something like that. Akio put his hands up. “But there’s no reason to worry. I just need to do as he says.”

“I’m guessing Ace wants to be the mafia leader after we overthrow Chuuya?” He asked. Akio nodded. Dazai huffed. Everyone in the mafia was the same. Chuuya was the only one worth saving.

When the time came, Dazai easily blended in with the group he was working with. He had given them the information but he wasn’t leading the operation. The man in charge was a strange-looking, eccentric guy named Kajii. Just listening to him made Dazai want to cover his ears.

He was relieved when the strategy talk was over and they got to the actual mission. Dazai was with a group of ten other people. They easily got on the ship since another group worked to dispatch the guards. Dazai struggled but managed to pick up one of the boxes. He never expected guns to be so heavy. The rest of his group made quick work of the rest and soon, they had all of them and they slowly left the ship, their eyes darting around anxiously, afraid of getting caught. Kajii almost got them caught when he saw them with all the guns and let out a shout of joy. Dazai rolled his eyes so hard he felt like they would fall out of his head.

______________________

The penthouse was filled with amazing smells when he got back. As soon as the door closed, he was confronted by Chuuya. The shorter man looked up at him, his arms crossed.

“Where the hell did you disappear to?” He demanded. Dazai gave him a reassuring smile and hugged him. He took off his hat and let his tail free, sighing in relief.

“I was trying to get used to the layout of the Port Mafia. It’s good for me to know how everything is run if I’m going to be helping you,” his voice dripped with affection. Chuuya sighed and scratched him behind the ears.

“I was worried,” he whispered. Dazai nodded. He felt a little bit of guilt when he heard that. Chuuya shouldn’t worry about him. He was betraying him. No. He may be betraying Chuuya now, but this was all for Chuuya.
Chuuya squeezed his hand as he took him to the kitchen. Dazai drooled as the smell of crab filled his nose. Chuuya chuckled when he saw the look of hunger on his face. “It’s almost done. Go sit down.”

Dazai pouted as he sat down and watched Chuuya cook. Everything about Chuuya was intoxicating to him. The guilt was eating at him but he kept repeating to himself that this was for Chuuya.

“I got some bad news when I got home,” Chuuya sighed as he continued to cook. Dazai hummed inquisitively, acting like he didn’t know. “The weapons shipment got robbed. A group of people stole all of it. I’m having Kouyou be in control of the investigation. I hope she can get me some information soon. I need to make an example of the people who did it or else everyone will assume they can walk all over me.”

Dazai nodded a bit. He knew Chuuya wouldn’t be saying those exact words if he knew he was one of the people who participated. Chuuya didn’t notice Dazai’s strange mood and set his plate in front of him. The brunette immediately started to eat. The flavor of the crab seemed to burst in his mouth, making him let out a soft moan. Chuuya chuckled as he sat across from him.

“Do you think it’s Ace?” Dazai asked, his head tilted innocently. Chuuya nodded, sighing again. Dazai could see the stress on the other man’s face and body. As soon as he finished his food, he crawled into Chuuya’s lap and started to knead his sore shoulders. Chuuya let out a pleasured moan. “The mafia is corrupt. It’s not surprising that things like this are happening.”

“You’re right, but it’s also important. Everything would be chaotic if the Port Mafia suddenly disbanded,” Chuuya whispered. His voice was so soft and it made Dazai keen. He knew that what Chuuya was saying was correct but if they left Yokohama, they wouldn’t have to worry about any of that.

“How will you punish them?” Dazai asked. Chuuya sighed again and squeezed Dazai.

“I don’t know. I need proof that Ace did it first and then I can demote him from being an executive. I’ll need to find out who the others are to know how to properly punish them,” he explained. Dazai nodded. He wondered what kind of punishment he would receive if Chuuya ever found out. Would he not want to be around him anymore? He knew that if this came out, Chuuya would be very angry with him, but he was determined not to let it come out.

Chapter 29 Chapter Text

Dazai had his arms crossed. He was seated at a table. Akio had brought him here, telling him that the master wanted to see him. He waited impatiently. He was sure Ace was making him wait on purpose. He probably thought he was too important to meet with someone like Dazai. But Ace knew how important Dazai was to the rebellion. He had inside knowledge of Chuuya. He tapped his long nails on the table. His ears and tail ached from being confined with clothing. He wanted to go home but he needed to do this. This was all for Chuuya’s sake.

He looked up as he heard a sound. He expected to see Ace but it was only Akio. The young man looked exhausted, with deep bags under his eyes. He approached and handed Dazai a glass of water.

“I apologize on behalf of the master. He is very busy,” Akio said. Dazai could tell that he was told to say that. He only nodded. He had nothing against any of the slaves here. He already pieced together that there was something going on with those collars. Earlier, he saw another person with one of those collars who could only be a teenager. Akio had introduced him as Karma. “Are you going to drink?”

Dazai raised an eyebrow at the question. He had no plans of doing that. He wouldn’t put it past Ace to try and drug him. He shook his head no and Akio sighed. His voice was laced with exhaustion. He bowed before making his exit. Dazai felt pity for all of the people under Ace’s control. The man probably took great delight in seeing how exhausted they were. Dazai knew Chuuya was in his office now. He wanted to be with him instead of doing this boring sh*t. But he did need to have connections to Ace. Ace was an important member of the rebellion and he needed to get a good read on his personality. He waited for what felt like ages before the door opened again and an older man with gray hair entered the room. He had a co*cky smile on his face as he sat across from Dazai.

“You are Tsushima, right?” Ace asked. His voice sounded like nails on a chalkboard to Dazai. He only nodded at the question. “I see. Thank you for your help with the shipment. I hope we can have a very beneficial relationship.”

“What are your plans? I know you want to overthrow the boss, but what will you do after you achieve that?” Dazai asked. Ace hummed, lacing his fingers together in front of him. Everything about this man made Dazai feel sick to his stomach.

“I don’t share information like that until I know who I’m talking to,” Ace whispered as if it were an important secret. Dazai sighed and leaned back in his chair. “So, what is your ability? I highly doubt Nakahara would allow someone close to him if they didn’t have an ability.”

That’s where you and him are different. Chuuya doesn’t care about power. He would accept someone even if they were no use to him. Dazai thought angrily.

“My ability is like Akio’s. I can manipulate whoever I want using it,” Dazai explained. He decided to go for something that was partially true. He was a master manipulator, it just wasn’t an ability. It was his natural talent. Ace’s eyes immediately narrowed suspiciously. Dazai could practically read his thoughts. He didn’t like the idea of someone being able to manipulate him so easily.

“I see. Have you used that ability on Nakahara?” Ace asked. Dazai nodded. Ace grinned wickedly, looking delighted. Dazai wanted to claw that smug grin off his face. “I see. So that’s how you’ve managed to get close to him. I can definitely use you.”

Dazai growled slightly under his breath. The only one getting used in this room was Ace. But the man was too co*cky to realize it. The young boy, Karma, nervously entered the room, giving Ace a glass of what looked like champagne. Ace took one look at it before he threw the glass away. Karma froze, fear in his eyes.

“I told you to have it prepared in my favorite glass,” Ace growled. Karma was cowering in fear. Dazai guessed that the scar on his cheek was a result of Ace.

“I-I’m sorry master! Th-They said that the glass was dirty and needed to be cleaned!” Karma desperately tried explaining himself but Ace only rolled his eyes. He didn’t seem to care at all about what the boy thought.

“Go. I’ll deal with you when our guest is gone,” Ace growled. Karma made a small noise of fear and scrambled to leave the room. Dazai’s hands were gripping his own thighs in anger. There was no way that boy was over the age of sixteen and yet Ace treated him like that. “I apologize for my subordinates. I actually have a proposition for you.”

“And what is your proposition?” Dazai asked. He knew that whatever it was, it wouldn’t be good. This man only did what was good for him. Ace reached into his pocket and pulled out a collar, placing it on the table. The large red gem in the middle made it instantly recognizable.

“You become a permanent member of the rebellion. Putting on this collar will make sure you are not a spy sent by the boss. I will make sure you are given preferential treatment. You will not be like my other toys,” Ace’s face was stuck with that same grin and it made Dazai shiver. He hated this man so much. He hummed and pushed the collar away.

“I refuse,” he said. Based on how Ace was trying to convince him, he figured out that his ability must have to have some form of consent for the collar to do whatever it does. Ace narrowed his eyes, clearly not used to being told no. He stood up.

“Then don’t think I’ll let you stay in the rebellion. You’re probably just a spy reporting everything back to Nakahara,” Ace hissed. Dazai rolled his eyes. The man was only partially correct. He was a spy but Chuuya had no knowledge of what he was doing.

“You know you can’t do that. I have too much useful information for you. You can believe whatever you want about me. I just refuse to submit to a slimy man like you,” Dazai growled, letting some of his disdain leak into his voice. Anger flashed in Ace’s eyes and he immediately whipped out a knife. His skills with it were extremely poor as he desperately tried to stab Dazai. The Bakeneko easily dodged all of his attacks, his lean body allowing him to move smoothly. Ace opened his mouth to call for his slaves to come hold him down but Dazai was already running. His feet skidded across the floor as he ran as fast as he possibly could. A part of him wanted to turn into his cat form because it would allow him to move much faster but he couldn’t be seen like that.

He only stopped once he was a good distance from the massive building. He collapsed on the ground, panting. He struggled to get oxygen into his lungs after how hard he had been running.

______________________

“You look like sh*t,” Chuuya huffed when Dazai entered the penthouse. Dazai rolled his eyes.

“Thanks for your astute observation, Chuuya,” he growled. Chuuya chuckled and walked over, wrapping his arms around Dazai’s middle and nuzzling against his back.

“Where were you? Exploring again?” He asked. Dazai nodded. He already had a full cover story planned for if Chuuya asked any more questions. “Yeah. I encountered some of the rebellion. I saw them talking to each other so I eavesdropped a bit. One of them spotted me so I had to make a run for it. Luckily, none of them saw my face or anything.”

“You can’t be doing dangerous sh*t like that,” Chuuya growled, his hands digging into Dazai’s hips. Dazai scoffed a bit. If only Chuuya knew exactly what he was doing. “Please. I don’t want you to get hurt.”

Dazai heard the fear in his lover’s voice. But he didn’t deserve for Chuuya to feel like that for him. He was betraying Chuuya. He was a traitor in all ways. But Chuuya loved him so sincerely. Chuuya adored him with all his heart even though he didn’t deserve it.

“I won’t go off alone as much. I still want to explore the area though. I promise to be as safe as possible,” Dazai swore. Chuuya sighed and nodded, pulling Dazai down for a gentle kiss. Their lips moved together in a gentle display of passion. The brunette felt like he could kiss the other for hours and not get bored.

“Come on. Let’s get you a bath,” Chuuya tugged on Dazai’s arms, taking him to the large bathroom.

Chapter 30 Chapter Text

Chuuya sighed, his face pressed against his desk. The stress was eating away at him. There was so much that needed to be done. So many papers to look over. He didn’t even have Dazai to distract him. His lover kept disappearing for hours at a time and arriving at their home later. He always said he was exploring but Chuuya was starting to get suspicious. He didn’t want to be suspicious, but he couldn’t help it.

The more he sat in this office, the more he realized why Mori was a good fit as the boss. Mori wasn’t weak by any means. But he was much more suited to doing the dirty work behind the scenes rather than participating in the gritty frontlines. Chuuya was the opposite. That was why he was promoted to executive so fast. Mori saw him as the perfect little guard dog, always ready to throw himself into the heart of the action.

Now, Chuuya was the one who was expected to stay locked away in this room. He tapped his pen against the paper in front of him. It was a form requesting more weapons for the black lizard. He already planned on approving it but he kept getting distracted. He was not meant for a job like this. His muscles ached to move. To run into the middle of battle. A part of him would always crave that thrill. He huffed as he finally stood up. He wasn’t getting any work done so he might as well walk for a bit. It was strange having people immediately bow to him when they saw him. But, it was something he needed to get used to. He found himself face-to-face with Tachihara. The young man was a friend of Chuuya. They would occasionally go drinking together before Chuuya got Dazai.

“Hey, boss. What are you doing here?” The redhead asked as he loaded his gun. Chuuya realized he walked all the way to the black lizard’s preparation rooms without thinking. Chuuya cringed as Tachihara referred to him as boss and the younger man laughed at the face he made. “Sorry. I knew you wouldn’t like being referred to like that. I can keep calling you Chuuya, right?”

“For the love of all that is good, please do. Hearing you speak so formally makes me want to puke,” Chuuya huffed, putting his hands in his pockets. Tachihara chuckled and nodded. The noise they were making drew Gin in. They stood beside Tachihara, leaning against him.

“Hello, boss. I’m sorry for his disrespect,” she said, pulling on Tachihara’s hair. Chuuya shook his head. Gin was one of the few people who was able to tame Tachihara.

“No, I prefer it. You two are going on a mission soon, right?” He asked. Gin nodded.

“Yes, sir. Hirotsu-San is surveying the area. We are going to handle some thieves that have been encroaching on port mafia territory,” Gin explained confidently. Chuuya nodded. He trusted Hirotsu a lot. The older man had acted as a mentor figure to him when he first joined the Port Mafia. He was also one of the people who adamantly supported him as the new boss.

“Take me with you,” Chuuya ordered. He itched to get into battle. Gin’s eyes widened.

“D-Do you doubt our ability to deal with it?” He asked. Chuuya shook his head. He didn’t want to admit how sitting in that office had affected him.

“No. I have no doubt that you would be able to deal with it. This is a personal thing. I want to get active. I’m already aware of how the Black Lizard operates so you won’t have to worry about me slowing you down,” Chuuya said, using all of his charisma. Gin hummed and nodded.

“Of course, boss,” they said, bowing. Chuuya wanted to tell them not to do that but he knew how Gin acted. She wouldn’t be able to. He would continue bowing even if Chuuya asked them not to.

____________________

The sound of gunfire was something that Chuuya hadn’t heard in a while. He stood in the middle of the battlefield, a flurry of bullets floating in midair in front of him. He turned them around and sent them off to the rival gang. He felt a thrill as they all fell down. He hadn’t lost his touch.

Hirotsu, Gin, and Tachihara were inside the building, finding the leader and interrogating him while Chuuya got rid of the grunts outside. They all fought valiantly but they were no match for Chuuya.

He walked over the bodies of the dead without a care until he heard the slightest sound. But by the time he noticed, it was already too late.

The sound of a gunshot split the air and Chuuya felt a sharp pain in his back. He gritted his teeth and used his ability to pick up all the bullets on the ground and send them in the direction the shot came from. He collapsed on the ground, pain quickly overtaking him. It was his fault. He let his guard down. He was rusty from being stuck in that office all day.

_____________________

“I got news,” one of the rebellion members suddenly ran up to a group that was talking. Everyone looked at the young man curiously, including Dazai. “Nakahara got hurt in battle!”

Immediately, Dazai felt a chill go through him. The people around him immediately took great delight in the news, already thinking up ways of exploiting the boss’ weakness. Dazai was frozen. His mind was a whirlwind of thoughts. His first instinct was to book it to wherever Chuuya was, but he knew how suspicious that would look to everyone else. He was already on thin ice after his encounter with Ace. He couldn’t risk any more suspicion or else his plan would never work.

“This is perfect,” the words felt like soot on his tongue as he spoke. The others all nodded in agreement. Ace wasn’t there, as he was always locked away in his room since he saw himself as being so much more important.

The others immediately started coming up with schemes of messing things up while Chuuya was out of commission but Dazai stayed quiet. Some were even offering up assassination ideas, which he quickly shot down by telling them how much security Chuuya would have around him.

“Are you okay, Tsushima-San?” Akio spoke up. Dazai tilted his head. He looked down at his hand and realized he was shaking.

“Yes. I’m perfectly fine. I haven’t eaten much today,” he lied. Akio nodded, accepting the lie easily. Dazai glared at his trembling hand. His entire body was itching to find where Chuuya was and be with him. If he were in the office with Chuuya, this would have never happened. He shook his head. No, he needed to do this. He had to destroy the port mafia from the inside. If he didn’t, the port mafia would pursue him and Chuuya no matter what. He would keep a close eye on the rebellion, steering it only in the ways he wanted. He wouldn’t let them harm the one person he cared about. After the discussion had gone on for a while, he spoke up. “I have to get going. Others will get suspicious if I’m not there.”

All of the others took his excuse and bid him goodbye. He walked calmly until he was out of sight. He then started sprinting. He didn’t even know where he was going. He decided to head to the hospital, as it was the safest bet. The boy had only said Chuuya got injured but the only reason it would be mentioned was if it was a serious injury. He looked around to make sure no one was around before shifting into his cat form and running as fast as he could, the wind streaming through his fur.

The massive structure of the hospital came into view and he took a sigh of relief. He hid behind the building so he could safely shift into his human form before entering.

“I’m here to see Nakahara Chuuya,” he said to the receptionist. She lifted an eyebrow at him, looking unimpressed. Dazai clenched his fists. Of course, they wouldn’t allow him in. Chuuya was the boss. He sniffed the air. He could smell Chuuya’s faint scent. He had been here recently. He bowed to the woman before he left the hospital. He went back behind it to turn into his cat form. He looked up at the massive building. Based on the scent he got and common logic, Chuuya would likely be on one of the top floors. He scaled the building and found a way to climb up by using the windows.

Dazai dared not look down as he climbed higher and higher. As he got to the highest floor, he started looking inside the windows. He carefully jumped from one window ledge to the next, looking inside. He sighed in relief when he found Chuuya. The man was in a hospital bed, looking bored. He immediately started to paw at the window and meow. Chuuya’s eyes shot up and a smile broke out across his face. He struggled to stand up and limped over to the window. As soon as the window was opened, Dazai jumped inside and turned into his human form.

“What happened?! I heard you got hurt!” Dazai asked as he urged Chuuya to lie back down. Chuuya rolled his eyes, looking unbothered about everything that happened.

“It was my fault. I got sloppy and got shot. It's because I’ve been stuck in the damn office. I’m completely fine. They got the bullet out and everything,” Chuuya tried to give Dazai a reassuring smile but Dazai wasn’t having it.

“You could’ve died!” He exclaimed. Chuuya put his hands up, trying to calm the angry cat.

“I could have. But I didn't. I’m fine, Osamu. Where were you? Exploring again? How did you find out what happened?” Chuuya asked. Dread settled in Dazai’s gut. In his panic, he had failed to come up with a good cover story.

Chapter 31 Chapter Text

“W-Well, news travels fast in the port mafia. I was exploring when one of the members came running and told me what happened. As soon as I heard, I ran here. You can’t scare me like that,” Dazai huffed, grateful for his quick mind that he didn’t stumble in his story. He turned into his cat form so he could crawl into Chuuya’s lap without hurting him. Chuuya had a soft smile on his face and scratched him behind the ears.

“Are you sure you should continue exploring all alone? We can always look around together,” Chuuya suggested. Dazai shook his head, forcing out a purr. He couldn’t speak in his cat form so he could only look up at Chuuya. The ginger sighed. “I just don’t want you to get hurt, Osamu. If I’m with you, I know you’ll be safe because I’ll keep you safe. Also, I’m not made of glass. You can be in your human form and it won’t hurt me.”

Dazai huffed and shifted into his human form. Chuuya wrapped his arms around him, holding him securely. Dazai felt so safe in his warm arms. He just wished they were at home and not in a stuffy hospital room.

“I like exploring. I think if you were with me, everyone would be way too scared to talk to or approach me,” Dazai lied. He hoped it would be enough to get Chuuya off his case. He needed to be alone for it. He needed the port mafia to fail. Chuuya sighed and nodded, gently scratching Dazai’s hair. Dazai leaned into the touch and nuzzled against his lover’s neck.

“I love you, Osamu even though you are such an annoying brat,” Chuuya huffed. Dazai grinned mischievously and gently batted at Chuuya’s chest. He could smell the blood on Chuuya’s side where the bullet must have hit him. “I wish they would discharge me already. I need to be giving orders.”

“What you NEED to do is get some rest. I’m sure Kouyou-San is taking care of everything. So, you’re going to lay in this bed until they discharge you and then you’re going to lay in our bed at home,” Dazai said firmly. Chuuya rolled his eyes and gently squeezed Dazai’s hips.

“I’m the leader of the port mafia. I can’t afford to be stuck in bed. Since everyone already knows I’m hurt, the traitors know that I’ll be weak. I need to prove that I’m strong and capable,” Chuuya answered, looking stubborn. Dazai sighed. Chuuya and him were birds of a feather. Both are extremely stubborn and unwilling to ask for help. Dazai put his hands on Chuuya’s shoulders, holding him down firmly.

“You’re going to lay in bed until the doctors say that it is safe for you to work again,” Dazai’s voice was deep and firm, unyielding to anything. Chuuya scoffed and grabbed Dazai’s arms but didn’t push him away.

“I’ll rest for a little while but I refuse to stay in bed for long,” Chuuya growled. Dazai sighed, knowing that was the best he was going to get from Chuuya. He nuzzled into Chuuya’s chest, soaking in his warmth.

“Are… Are you sure you’ve just been exploring?” Chuuya’s voice took on a serious tone. Dazai froze for a bit before he found the energy to respond.

“Yeah. Why are you asking? Is something wrong?” Did Chuuya know? Did someone tell him? No, the only people who knew were the others in the rebellion and they wouldn’t speak to Chuuya unless it was necessary and definitely not tell him that he was a spy. He used a fake name and everything.

“I-It’s nothing. I just have a bad feeling I guess,” Chuuya said. Dazai clutched at the man’s shirt, feeling a bit panicked. He couldn’t have his plan fail. He was doing this for the both of them. Chuuya would never understand. His loyalty would get in the way of his logic and he wouldn’t realize why Dazai was doing what he was doing. He nuzzled against Chuuya and the shorter man smiled, pulling him in for a soft kiss. Dazai felt like the world was going to fall apart at any moment but Chuuya’s soft lips on his helped to ease that terror in his heart.

“I love you, chibi,” Dazai whispered. Chuuya smiled and kissed him again. That look of pure love in his eyes made Dazai’s heart ache strangely. He didn’t deserve that love. He knew that he should tell Chuuya. But he wanted to live happily with him outside of the port mafia.

___________________________

Chuuya was stuck at home. Dazai and Kouyou were both forcing him to get some rest. He trusted Kouyou’s ability to take care of everything but he expected Dazai to stay at home with him but the man went running off again. The way he was acting was very strange. Chuuya felt a bit guilty for doubting his lover but there was definitely something going on.

He had been so busy with mafia business that he couldn’t look into it but now he had the time. He kept going over everything Dazai had said. He always said he was exploring but he always got news rather quickly. People in the mafia were naturally cautious of people they didn’t know. They wouldn’t go spewing random news to a man they didn’t know.

Before he could think more, he heard the sound of the door unlocking. He felt a bit of excitement, thinking it might be Dazai. But Kouyou entered the apartment. Her face was grim and serious and Chuuya knew that he had something new to worry about.

“Chuuya, we need to talk,” even with her voice being so serious, she still walked elegantly, forever graceful. She sat down next to him on the couch. She had his undivided attention and she started to talk. “You need to listen to me. Don’t butt in because you don’t believe what I say. You need to listen and understand.”

“Okay. What’s going on?” Chuuya asked. Whatever it was, it was important. Kouyou sighed.

“I know you care for Dazai a lot. I saw him earlier. He was talking with some of the people associated with the rebellion. Specifically, some of Ace’s people. He seemed to be very close with them. There’s no way that was their first time talking. You know what I’m trying to say, don’t you?” She asked. Chuuya’s mind reeled with shock.

“There’s no way. He wouldn’t betray me. He’s been helping me all this time. Are you sure you saw what you think you did?” Chuuya demanded, his voice getting progressively louder and more demanding. Kouyou sighed and looked at the ground.

“I’m sure, Chuuya. He may have been trying to help you just so he could have information. I know you love him. But it’s dangerous to have him around. Especially to have him living with you. Those people want you dead. He could easily assassinate you in your sleep if he wanted to,” Kouyou said seriously. Chuuya hated the words she was saying but he knew they were spoken solely out of concern for him.

“I… I just can’t believe it. He must have some reason for it. Maybe he’s trying to get information from them about the rebellion. He has been helping me with the paperwork for all that sh*t. I highly doubt Dazai would ever get along with Ace and he’s the leader of them. It’s impossible,” Chuuya tried to rationalize it but he knew he was grasping at straws. But he couldn’t believe it. Dazai was sneaking away to meet with people who wanted him dead? Was there love a lie? “I… I’ll talk to him about it when he gets home.”

“Don’t let him manipulate you, Chuuya. He’s a smart little thing. Don’t get wrapped around his finger,” Kouyou warned. Chuuya only nodded. He felt broken down. The person he loved so dearly might be a traitor. Another person he will lose. Another person he couldn’t keep around. This was just like the sheep. Kouyou nodded and gracefully rose. “I will return to your office. Everything has still been running well in your absence. I’ll tell you if anything serious happens.”

Chuuya watched her leave the penthouse and heard the door close. As soon as she was gone, exhaustion pulled at him but he refused to sleep. He needed to wait for Dazai to get home. Five hours passed before the door opened and Dazai trotted inside, immediately taking off his hat and freeing his tail from his pants. He had a big smile on his face as he walked over and plopped down on Chuuya’s lap.

“Welcome home. I need to talk to you,” Chuuya whispered. Dazai sensed the seriousness in Chuuya and immediately looked at him with a tilted head. “Ane-San saw you. Talking with some of Ace’s people. I’m not mad. I just want an explanation.”

“Huh? Ace’s people?” Dazai looked completely taken aback, a look of innocent confusion on his face. Hope flared in Chuuya’s chest. Maybe Dazai didn’t know.

“Yeah. I don’t know exactly which ones but Ace has a lot of people under his control. They have collars around their necks,” Chuuya explained. Realization dawned on Dazai’s face.

“I didn’t know they were with Ace, Chuuya. I’ve been talking to them for a while but they’ve never brought him up. I assumed the collar was a fashion thing,” Dazai explained. Chuuya felt an immense amount of relief crash into him. It was all an innocent misunderstanding.

“Thank god. I was so scared. I thought you might be conspiring against me,” Chuuya laughed awkwardly. It all seemed stupid now that he thought about it. Of course, Dazai wouldn’t betray him.

“What would I even have to gain from that?” Dazai asked, gently kissing Chuuya on the cheek. Chuuya chuckled and pulled Dazai close. It was all a misunderstanding. Everything was okay.

It was going to be okay.

Chapter 32 Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

“Hey, Chuuya,” Chuuya was sitting at his desk when Tachihara entered. It had been a couple of days since he got shot. He got back to work as soon as possible out of the fear of the port mafia falling apart. The red-haired man casually strolled into the office. Chuuya could tell that this wasn’t related to any mission or job since the rest of the Black Lizard weren’t with him. He crossed his arms.

“What are you here for, Tachihara?” He asked. There was something off about how the other man was acting. Tachihara was usually so carefree and would say anything. Now, he seems hesitant to say what was on his mind. Chuuya crooked a finger. “Spit it out.”

“It… It’s about that guy that you’re living with,” Tachihara said, his voice low and quiet. Chuuya’s eyes widened. He had never told Tachihara about Dazai.

“How do you know about him? Who else knows?” Chuuya demanded. Tachihara put his hands up in a sign of peace but Chuuya wouldn’t calm down.

“He’s a brunette, right? Word spreads fast in the mafia. I heard it through the grapevine. I’m guessing most people know now,” he said. Chuuya cursed quietly and slammed his fist against the desk. This was bad. Very bad. If people knew about Dazai, Dazai would be in danger. People would try to capture him in order to get to Chuuya. “Is it really such a big deal to have a roommate?”

“Do you know where the rumor started?” Chuuya ignored the other man’s question and asked his own. He needed to get this sorted out before everything got out of hand.

“No, I don’t. I didn’t come here to talk about the rumors, but I guess they’re true by how you’re reacting. I came because I saw him. He was with some of Ace’s little pawns,” Tachihara reported. Chuuya sighed. He knew that Dazai was friends with them but he would prefer it if he stopped meeting up with them.

“I know. He’s friends with them. He’s not involved with Ace or the rebellion. He wasn’t aware they belonged to Ace,” Chuuya explained. Tachihara tilted his head and hummed, tapping his fingers against the desk.

“Are you sure he isn’t?” He asked after a moment. Chuuya raised an eyebrow. He was surprised that Tachihara had the guts to question the leader of the port mafia but he supposed it was just a remnant of their relationship in the past.

“Why are you doubting me?” He asked, his voice deep and taking on a threatening edge even though he didn’t plan on doing anything to Tachihara. The other man was just nosy. He was always getting into other people’s business.

“It’s just that… I listened in for a bit. They were all talking about plans for the rebellion. That brunette wasn’t just listening and not saying anything, he was participating in the conversations,” Tachihara answered. Chuuya looked at the red-head. He doubted what the man was saying but Tachihara looked completely sincere. Despite his love of drama, Tachihara wasn’t the type to lie and bring up something that never happened.

“There’s no way. You must be mistaken. You probably got the voices confused,” Chuuya reasoned. There was no way Dazai would betray him after everything they’ve gone through together, right? He got up and started to pace the room. His anxiety was spiking. He could feel the stirring of the calamity inside of him. Arahabaki roared at the idea of what he protected, betraying him. Tachihara seemed to sense the mood Chuuya was in as he took some steps back to allow the boss the most room.

“I’m not mistaken. I may have never talked with him before but I both saw and heard him talking. Are you sure you aren’t letting your emotions get the best of you? What’s your relationship with him, anyways?” Tachihara asked. Chuuya clenched his fists. Even just hearing Tachihara’s voice was grating on his frayed nerves.

“My relationship with him doesn’t matter. Don't accuse your boss of losing control, Tachihara,” Chuuya growled, his voice taking on that threatening edge again. This time, he wasn’t sure if he meant it or not. His entire body felt hot but also cold. The rage he felt was counteracted by the cold fear that maybe Dazai had been lying to him. Maybe his lover had betrayed him after all. Maybe Kouyou was right. “Where did you see them?”

“They were at the storage site near Ace’s little lair,” Tachihara reported. He looked prepared for Chuuya to attack him at any moment. “Do you want me to take the Black Lizard and apprehend them?”

“No,” Chuuya immediately answered. He tried to convince himself it was for purely logical reasons, but his mind told him it was because Dazai MIGHT be there. He didn’t want his lover to get hurt even if he was a traitor. “I’ll check it out. Don’t mention this to anyone.”

Tachihara nodded and bowed to Chuuya, showing his loyalty. Chuuya stalked out of the large office and took off down the stairs. He knew the way to the storage site and it would only take him around fifteen minutes to walk there.

His steps were fast as he walked, his mind reeling. A part of him had accepted the possibility that Dazai may be a traitor but he couldn’t understand why. Everything was going well between the two of them. They cuddled every night and he provided for all of the Bakeneko’s needs.

Chuuya really didn’t need this additional stress. As he neared the site, he slowed down and used his ability to walk silently. The voices were loud and boisterous but Chuuya didn’t hear Dazai. He sneaked between some of the large storage containers until he had a clear but concealed view of the group. His eyes were immediately drawn to Dazai. The man was as beautiful as ever. He was silent as the group talked. They were mainly made up of Ace’s slaves.

“I think we should storm the office building! It’ll be so cool if we just run and go BOOM! But I know that’s not very practical,” a young-looking girl said. Chuuya felt bad for her. She couldn’t have been any older than fourteen. He almost scoffed at the ridiculousness of the idea.

“That obviously won’t work, Yuki. The boss’ ability is incredibly strong. He may be a weak leader, but his strength is where he shines,” Chuuya’s heart sank when it was Dazai’s voice that spoke. It felt like a spear through his heart. Dazai talked about him with such disdain in his voice. Was their love a lie?

Of course, this would happen. No one ever truly cared about him. They cared about using him for their benefit. That’s how it always was and how it always would be. He bit his lip. He was stupid for hoping for more.

“We need to not focus on the boss. We need to shut down all the systems around him first. That’s our best option,” Dazai continued. Chuuya sat behind one of the storage containers, feeling like he was being ripped to pieces.

“But that would leave nothing for us once he’s gone,” a pink-haired man spoke up. Chuuya narrowed his eyes. That was right. What the hell was Dazai trying to do? The brunette’s eyes seemed to twinkle for a moment.

“It’ll destabilize him. Just because he’s too stupid to build up an empire again, doesn’t mean our next leader can’t,” Dazai spoke confidently. Chuuya couldn’t listen anymore. He took off running.

______________________

After saying his sentence, Dazai’s eyes darted away for a moment. He saw movement. But maybe it was his imagination or it was one of the younger kids playing tag or something. Maybe even a rat.

The strategy meeting went on, Dazai continuing to try and get them to tear down the mafia in the hopes of getting to Chuuya. Any time anyone brought up assassination, Dazai shot them down vehemently. While he tried to be present, his mind was on the movement he saw. He didn’t hear anything which was odd.

Suddenly, it dawned on him.

Chuuya.

“I-I have to go. W-We can continue another time,” Dazai yelled as he immediately started running. He needed to get home. He had to get home and explain to Chuuya. This was a stupid idea. He should have clued Chuuya into everything. Once he was far enough away from the group, he changed into his cat form and ran as fast as possible, his lungs feeling like they would burst.

Fear was overtaking him. He didn’t want to lose this. He didn’t want to lose Chuuya. He would apologize. He would explain his entire thought process. Chuuya would take him back, right?

No one would ever take in someone like you after you betray them. You were a coward who didn’t think things through. This is your punishment. You never deserved to have a loving home.

The voice in his head sounded scarily like Mori.

Notes:

Important announcements!
1. There will be no new chapter next week
2. This chapter will be uploading on Fridays from now on
3. From now on new chapters are going to be longer!

Chapter 33 Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

His lungs burned as he ran as fast as he possibly could. His paws skidded along the ground as he pelted towards the large apartment building. He shifted back into his human form when he was outside of the apartments and he ran inside, calling the elevator. He scanned the card giving him access to the penthouse and finally took a moment to catch his breath. His lungs and entire body were still pumped full of adrenaline. He needed to explain. Why did Chuuya have to see him? There was no reason for Chuuya to be suspicious now! Did he not trust what he said when he was confronted? Maybe Kouyou talked to him again and convinced him.

As soon as the elevator doors parted, he ran into the penthouse. He looked around wildly, his brown eyes scanning the room. But there was no need. Chuuya was sitting on the couch, his back facing toward Dazai. The apartment was dead silent. Immediately, Dazai felt uneasiness creep in. His steps sounded like thunder as he got closer.

“Ch-Chuuya?” His shaky voice broke the silence. Chuuya didn’t respond. Dazai shifted into his cat form. He always felt a little safer in this form. People were less likely to hurt a cat and he could escape much easier. He crept closer to the silent figure on the couch. He would almost think Chuuya were dead if not for the fact that he could see the man’s chest rising and falling and hear the soft puffs of him exhaling. He crept along the outside of the couch until he could see the redhead’s face.

Chuuya was staring down at the couch. His eyes looked empty. Almost like Dazai’s. That look scared the cat. Chuuya shouldn’t look like that. Chuuya should be full of life. He jumped onto the couch which startled Chuuya out of whatever state he was in. His eyes widened when he saw Dazai. The cat was a little relieved to see a rival of that spark in his eyes but it quickly changed into a look Dazai was very familiar with. Anger.

“You really think you can just waltz back in here after what you did?!” Chuuya demanded. Dazai flinched away at the loud volume. He changed into his human form. His tail was tucked and his ears pressed against his head. Even though they argued, Chuuya was never this angry. It reminded Dazai of Mori.

“I… Please just let me explain, Chuuya,” Dazai said, trying to keep his voice sounding strong. Chuuya gritted his teeth. His fists were clenched so Dazai was extremely tense, ready to dart if the other man attempted to attack him.

“Fine. f*cking speak,” Chuuya demanded. Dazai knew that this was probably the end. There was no way to convince Chuuya when he was acting like this. Dazai didn’t blame him. He wouldn’t trust himself either.

“I’m not trying to get you hurt or overthrown. That was never my intention. I’m doing this for us. I’m trying to get the mafia to fall apart so we can both be free of it and live without that cursed organization,” Dazai exclaimed, his voice full of conviction. He fully believed what he said. Chuuya chuckled.

“So, you’re saying this is for us? That lying to me over and over and going behind my back to scheme with people who want me dead is for me?! Are you f*cking kidding me? Don’t lie to yourself, Dazai. This is for you. You don’t like the Port Mafia. So you want it destroyed. If this was truly for both of us, you would have told me. You wouldn’t have hidden this,” Chuuya spat. Even though he was trying to only convey anger, Dazai could see the hurt in his lover’s eyes. Chuuya felt betrayed. Dazai caused this. He felt a stab of pain in his chest at the realization.

“Chuuya no! I-I did do this for us! You have to understand! The mafia is not fit for you. Just because it gave you another chance at life doesn’t mean it’s your only option! There’s so much you could do! You don’t deserve to be in an organization that is tainted. If they found out that you killed Mori, they would all turn on you!” Dazai exclaimed. He desperately tried to convince his lover. He didn’t want this to end. He couldn’t handle it. He was ready to beg Chuuya if he had to. But Chuuya’s blue eyes were cold. Dazai was so used to the warm, loving look in those eyes that he never thought to fear this look. This look of cold disdain.

“You betrayed me, Dazai. Just like everyone else does. You say that everyone would turn on me, but you are no better. You turned on me for your own selfish wants and desires. You can lie to yourself all you want. Keep telling yourself that this was for us. We both know that’s not true,” Chuuya’s words were spoken so softly that they were almost a whisper. Dazai whimpered, his ears twitching. His chest hurt so much. He would rather be tortured by Mori for years than have to go through this.

“Chuuya… Please. You have to believe me. I… This was for us,” Dazai whimpered. He did it for Chuuya! He never would have done any of this if he didn’t love Chuuya! He screamed that in his head but he knew it was pointless. Chuuya refused to look at Dazai, not wanting to see the hurt in those chocolate eyes.

“I really love you, Dazai. I trusted you so much. But you’ve been plotting with the people who are trying to kill me. I heard them. They were talking about assassinating me. You’ve probably been lying to me about some of the paperwork too, right? You’ve just been giving them the information. The shipment being sabotaged was probably your doing. No one except me, you, and the black lizard knew about that shipment. You gave them that information,” Chuuya said as if he just come to that realization.

“Y-Yes I did give them that information. But that shipment was only a shipment. It wouldn’t harm you,” Dazai tried to justify his actions. Chuuya laughed at the ridiculousness of that statement and Dazai growled at him. “Don’t f*cking laugh! What is wrong with you?!”

“Me? What’s wrong with me?! I wasn’t the one who betrayed the person I was supposed to love!” Chuuya yelled back. Anger was like a flame in his belly, igniting his entire body and soul. Dazai’s tail fur was fluffed up in anger. Chuuya still saw him as beautiful. He hated himself because of it.

“I was doing it for us! Why won’t you listen? Do you even love me?” Dazai asked. His voice shook as if the words would tear him apart. He felt like they would. He needed Chuuya to understand. This wasn’t supposed to happen.

“You keep saying that over and over again. But if it really were for both of us, I would have been let in on this little plan of yours,” Chuuya growled. Dazai took note of how Chuuya didn’t answer his second question. It left a pang in his heart.

“Even if I did bring up the idea to you, you wouldn’t have agreed! Because you’re way too loyal to the port mafia! It has a chokehold on you!” Dazai exclaimed. Chuuya narrowed his eyes. Dazai hated that cold look.

“You’re talking as if I’m a completely unreasonable person. You’re the one who didn’t trust me enough. A relationship is built on trust, Dazai,” Chuuya whispered. Despite sounding firm, Dazai could hear the hurt in his voice. Dazai sank his long nails into his own palms. The pain was what he deserved.

“What now? Is this it for us? Do you even love me?” Dazai asked. He felt like a kitten again, seeking affection from anyone who would give it. Chuuya crossed his arms and looked away.

“You aren’t the person I fell in love with. The one I fell in love with would trust me,” Chuuya whispered. The words felt like an arrow through Dazai’s heart.

“Y-You can’t be serious… Chuuya I promise I did this for us. I wanted you to be free from the clutches of the mafia. You deserve to do better things,” Dazai’s voice took on a begging tone. He didn’t want to lose this. He couldn’t lose this.

“Dazai. We both know that’s not the case,” Chuuya said. He still refused to meet Dazai’s eyes. Dazai’s ears pinned against his head and he huffed, turning around.

“Fine! Then I’ll just leave like you clearly want me to. You won’t have to see me ever again,” he growled as he stormed out of the penthouse. As he got in the elevator, he looked at it one last time. The place he had made his home. He always felt safe in the walls of that place. The elevator doors closed and he collapsed to his knees in anguish. He wanted to scream. He wanted to destroy everything around him. He was aware that this outcome was a possibility of his plan but he thought he may have a chance of convincing Chuuya. But their love just wasn’t strong enough. As the elevator doors opened on the first floor, he forced himself to his feet and miserably left the apartment building. He looked up at it, at all the lights from the windows. People lived there. Likely with their lovers and families.

Dazai thought he had found that.

Each step felt like it would destroy him as he trudged through the streets. He found a secluded area and changed into his cat form so people wouldn’t notice him as much. He had nowhere to go. When he escaped Mori, Atsushi had let him stay at the little shelter he made before meeting Akutagawa. Dazai felt a pang of jealousy but pushed it down. There was no point. His own actions caused this.

His stomach growled but he had no chance of getting food. He was too depressed to beg random people for it. His tail dragged along the dirty sidewalk. Chuuya’s words rang in his head over and over. You aren’t the person I fell in love with. Chuuya never said anything that cruel. Even when they fought, Chuuya was still kind. So, that must be what he really believed. What part of Dazai did Chuuya fall in love with? Was it the weak one? Maybe Chuuya only wanted him when he was subservient. No. That wasn’t true. Chuuya always seemed to enjoy it when Dazai stood up to him.

Dazai found an alley between two buildings to settle to the night. He laid down on a piece of cardboard, his tail wrapping around himself. He was exhausted but even as he lay there with his eyes closed, sleep refused to come. He was so used to a warm body holding him. To gentle breaths against the nape of his neck. To Chuuya gently rubbing his thigh. He whimpered softly to himself.

This was all his fault.

___________________

Chuuya stood in the empty apartment. He felt numb. His hands gently touched the cat tree he bought. The penthouse would feel so empty now. His chest felt like a gaping chasm. He trusted someone and they stabbed him in the back again. He even told Dazai about how he had been betrayed before. Dazai was only using him. Just like everyone else.

He walked into his bedroom, shutting off the light, and climbing into the bed. He usually would go to sleep later but he couldn’t stand being conscious anymore. But the bed was too big. There was no stupid, lanky bastard next to him. Finally, the tears started to come. Hot, wet tears streamed down his face. He thought he had it. He thought he found someone who would always stay with him. Someone to love. Dazai was such a bright light in his life. But no. He was a traitor.

He had hoped that maybe it was all a misunderstanding, that maybe he had seen it wrong. But Dazai’s response was clear. His pleading echoed in Chuuya’s head. He knew Dazai believed in what he was saying. But that didn’t mean he didn’t get betrayed. Dazai was using him. Just like everyone else.

The entire night, Chuuya slipped in and out of sleep. Every time he woke up, he looked around for Dazai only to remember. The bed was too large. The blankets were too much. He had gotten used to Dazai stealing them from him during the night. He was cold.

______________________

“You look like sh*t,” Kouyou said as he walked into the large office. Chuuya shrugged. He barely got any sleep that night and now he was stuck here filling out paperwork without Dazai bothering him and sitting on his lap. Kouyou looked even more elegant compared to him. “What’s going on, Chuuya? Did something happen?”

“You were right,” he whispered. Kouyou had to get closer to hear what he said. She tilted her head in confusion so Chuuya continued. “About Dazai. Yesterday, Tachihara came in here and told me he saw Dazai with the rebellion. I checked it out. He was. He was feeding them information. We argued when he got home and then he left. I haven’t seen him since yesterday.”

Despite how betrayed he felt, he had been worried about Dazai all day. It was all he could think about. He knew Dazai could take care of himself but Chuuya felt protective of him. He wondered if the man had gone to stay with someone in the rebellion. Dazai claimed he was doing it so Chuuya could be free but now that would be put to the test. If Dazai continued working with the rebellion, that meant that he was doing it purely of his own desire. A part of Chuuya wanted that to be the case. Maybe then he could move on and not think of Dazai. But now he was feeling bad. That maybe Dazai really believed he was doing the right thing. Maybe it was out of love for him.

“Damn cat. You shouldn’t be so depressed about it. He was a traitor. Simple. He was using you for his own wants. You’re much better off without him. But, I have been keeping an eye on the rebellion. Ace seems to be very agitated recently. He has been acting irrationally. This may be our chance to destroy it completely,” Kouyou’s voice went from dripping with disdain to completely even and professional. Chuuya often felt like she was talking to two different people now. The Chuuya she practically raised and the boss of the port mafia.

“Give me some time and I’ll think up a plan,” he ordered. He didn’t want to admit why he said that. He was worried about destroying the rebellion and punishing the people in it because he didn’t want Dazai to be part of it. Even after the betrayal, he still cared for that insufferable cat. Dazai was like a delicious wine that would ruin Chuuya’s life but he couldn’t stop coming back for more even though it hurt every time.

“I understand. If you need help at all, please call me. Call me later as well. I’m worried about you,” Kouyou commanded. She reached out and ruffled his hair like he was still a kid before turning around and leaving. Chuuya heaved a massive sigh as the door shut behind her.

_______________________

Dazai wandered the streets like he used to, his tail dragging against the ground. He was exhausted after barely sleeping. He had been spoiled living in the penthouse. He was used to sleeping in a nice and quiet environment now so he couldn’t sleep with the blaring noises of Yokohama’s nightlife. He needed a plan. He wasn’t ready to give up yet.

He knew Chuuya loved him. He just felt betrayed so he lashed out. That’s all it was. He could easily weasel his way back into the mafia boss’ life. He shook his head. That kind of thinking is what got him into this situation. He needed to stop seeing Chuuya as another cog in the machine. Chuuya hated being seen as an object.

Dazai still hated the Port Mafia. Maybe he should destroy it and then reconnect with Chuuya? No, if he did that, the redhead would be even more bitter and would probably refuse to even talk to him.

Dazai was chased by a group of children and ended up outside a restaurant. He immediately recognized it. It was the place he met Chuuya. When he first approached the man, he was starving since he hadn’t eaten in a couple of days. He only approached because he had food. The second meeting was different. He wanted to be near the weirdly talkative man. He wanted to listen to his stories and feel his touch. Chuuya was a powerful magnet, constantly drawing Dazai in. Dazai didn’t struggle against that pull. He felt like there was something connecting the two of them. So, he couldn’t let this end.

He laid down under the table Chuuya always ate at. He could almost smell the man’s scent. Chuuya’s scent was something so unique. Dazai wished he could capture it in a bottle and sniff it whenever he wanted. A waitress shooed him away and he hissed at her before running. He missed home. He passed by the Port Mafia headquarters and looked up at the massive building. Chuuya was at the top of that. He wondered if he was miserable. He longed to run in and tackle the man, sit on his lap, and fill out his paperwork. He shook his head and continued walking.

He knew where Atsushi was living. It was an apartment with Akutagawa. He could go there. But he didn’t want to burden the younger man. He was sure Akutagawa wouldn’t even allow him in the apartment if he was made aware of what he did.

Notes:

There will be no new chapter next week. I’m so sorry. Life has been really hard for me recently

Chapter 34 Chapter Text

Getting his hands on a piece of paper and a pen was easier than he thought it would be. You would be surprised how many people there are who still write on paper in public. All he had to do was be very sweet and get them to pet him and then he snatched a page and the pen. He panted once he was far enough away from the girl. He changed into his human form and settled against a large building. The sun was high in the sky. He knew Chuuya was in his office at this time. He wondered how he was holding up. He set his pen to paper and started to write.

Hey Chibi,

I know you’re probably pissed that you have to see a message from me but I can’t help myself. I know you’re mad at me. But you know me. You know that I was doing it for both of us. I swear I was. Yes, I probably should have told you about my plan but you never would have agreed to it and you know that. You feel way too much responsibility for the Port Mafia. But you don’t belong in an awful place like that.

I love you, Chuuya. I know it’s sappy and stupid to say after I betrayed you but I love you. You’re the first person to ever make me feel love. I understand your anger. I would be angry too. But I did it for us. But I’m sorry I hurt you. I never meant to hurt you. That was the last thing I wanted.

I love you,
Dazai

He checked over the note a few times, thinking of anything else he needed to add. He lied a bit in the note. He honestly didn’t feel sorry for his actions. He hated the results they had but he didn’t understand why Chuuya was reacting so dramatically. If he thought logically, he would see that Dazai is right. He stood up, clutching the paper in his hand. He was only a few steps away from the huge apartment complex. He walked into the stairway. The elevator required a keycard to get to the penthouse but he could get to one of the doors if he walked up.

It only took a few flights for him to be left panting on the stairs. Why was it taking so damn long?! How was Chuuya able to run up these stairs?! He cursed his own lack of athleticism and struggled to his feet to continue the climb. He felt like he was climbing a mountain. When he finally got to the final door, he almost passed out. He got on his knees, slipping the paper under the door safely. He hoped Chuuya would notice it soon. He leaned his head against the door. Inside was the place he used to call home. He supposed it wasn’t his home anymore.

Chuuya had given him a wonderful place. A place to live and feel safe for once. Chuuya never demanded anything of him. He kept him safe and protected. Why, though? Dazai knew that Chuuya must have some selfish reason for his actions. Everyone did. There was no such thing as altruism. Humans did things for their own gain. Maybe Chuuya knew that he used to belong to Mori from the start and wanted to have an excuse to take him down? No, that didn’t make sense. If it was that then Chuuya wouldn’t have been so hesitant to take over as the boss. He huffed. There must be some reason.

He turned into his cat form and lay down. He felt exhausted even though the day had barely started. It was probably from having to sleep outside when he got so comfortable from sleeping in bed with Chuuya. He purred as he thought of the man’s warm body. His strong arms. His gentle voice. No. He shouldn’t be thinking so fondly of Chuuya. Why wasn’t he pissed? He should be angry that resources were taken away. That was why he felt so strongly for Chuuya, right? It was because Chuuya gave him things.

That was the only explanation for Dazai. Something like him didn’t feel such stupid emotions like love. Love was only a way to manipulate others. His tail lashed behind him. He wasn’t in love with Chuuya. He was just angry. He was angry that his plan failed. He was angry that Chuuya kicked him out. He forced himself to his feet and started the slow descent down the stairs.

His mind was stuck on Chuuya. He could only think of the man’s bright smile, his brilliant blue eyes, his gentle voice, and kind words. He shook his head to try and get rid of those thoughts but to no avail. He finally got outside and started to walk to a restaurant. He would have to distract himself by trying to survive. He needed to beg for food. Chuuya always made him such delicious food. He gave him so much tasty crab. Dazai hissed at himself.

He was acting ridiculous. He needed to forget about Chuuya unless his note worked and the man seeked him out to bring him back in.

__________________________

Chuuya sighed as he used his ability to quickly ascend up the stairs. It was another long day of sitting in that stuffy office and filling out paperwork. His subordinates would come in with reports and to ask for instructions. Kouyou had forbidden him from going on any missions for a while after what happened last time. He unlocked the door and stepped inside. He stepped on something that crinkled as soon as he was inside. He bent over to grab it and saw that it was a piece of paper with writing on it. Strange. Letters usually were delivered at the mail station downstairs. Why would someone climb all these stairs just for a letter?

He hummed as he set his bag down and walked over to the couch. His eyes quickly scanned through the letter. Then he read it again. And again. Water was filling his eyes. He wiped the tears away, refusing to let them fall. He had done enough crying over Dazai. But the note sounded so sincere. Maybe Dazai really did feel bad. But even then, he couldn’t forget that betrayal. Dazai betrayed him. He was plotting his downfall. But maybe he’s the one in the wrong. Maybe he should have listened to what Dazai was saying.

“Damn it!” He slammed his hand onto the table. Despite how hard he tried to be mad at Dazai, he only felt a longing for him. He wanted him there. He wanted everything to be back to normal. He wanted the brat to annoy him and pester him all day. But he was a traitor. Even after he learned about Chuuya’s history of being betrayed, he still did it. Kouyou was right. But he didn’t want to believe it.

He stood up. He wanted to throw the note away but he could only stare at it. He stored it in his desk before trudging into the kitchen to make himself dinner. The penthouse felt so empty with just him in it. He would always complain when Dazai would pester him as he cooked.

”Your lanky ass takes up too much space!”

“Chibi is just mad that I’m tall.”

Thinking about it brought an involuntary smile to his face. He shook his head. He shouldn’t think of Dazai so fondly.

____________________

Dazai thrashed and clawed at the person outside of the cage he was in. While he was sleeping, someone had caged him. His fur was puffed up as big as possible as he continued to hiss and spit. The cage was finally put down. The door was opened and he barreled out. He spun to face the person. It was a familiar face.

Akio. The boy he talked to most often in the rebellion. He hissed at the pink-haired man. Akio looked unamused, his arms crossed as he looked down at Dazai. Dazai had no clue why Akio grabbed him. Did he have a love of cats?

“I knew you weren’t entirely human,” Akio’s voice was calm, as if he didn’t just shatter Dazai’s mind. Akio knew? But there was no way. How would he know? Dazai hissed at the man, trying to convince him he was just a normal cat. “I know it’s you, Tsushima-San. Or, should I say, Dazai Osamu. Former pet of Mori Ougai and lover of Chuuya Nakahara.”

Dazai tried not to show any response to the words but his mind was reeling. He was sure that everyone in the rebellion trusted him. Did Ace make Akio do research on him? That seemed like the most likely possibility. Dazai knew there was no use now. He turned into his human form, his ears and tail on full display.

“What made you suspect me?” He asked. Akio leaned against the wall. Dazai favored Akio amongst the rebellion because he was calm and efficient. He looked at things logically. But maybe that was just an effect of Akio’s ability.

“A lot of things. A person randomly appearing with so much information on the boss. You always wearing a hat at all times and being uncomfortable when anyone was behind you. When you ran off as soon as you heard the boss was hurt. But the information you gave us was always true. So why? You weren’t trying to take down the rebellion,” Akio asked. Dazai scanned the environment. It was Ace’s slave quarters but none of the others were there. He looked for any cameras but saw none.

“It’s complicated. I don’t see why it has anything to do with you,” Dazai responded. He wasn’t interested in speaking to Akio. The man rolled his eyes.

“You have nowhere to go, Dazai. The boss found out about you helping us, didn’t he? I’ll keep your secret as long as you tell me the truth. You can stay here and continue helping us. You won’t be as much help since you’re no longer close to the boss but we can still use you,” Akio’s voice was extremely calm and calculated. It reminded Dazai of his own voice. He wanted to hiss again. He did not do anything for the rebellion. He was doing it for Chuuya. If only Chuuya realized that. But Akio was right that he had nowhere to go.

Maybe he could find a way like this. Maybe if he killed Ace, he could show Chuuya. He could prove his loyalty. Chuuya would take him back. Yes. That’s right. That’s all he had to do. He sat down on one of the beds.

“I’ll help you guys,” he decided.

________________________

Chuuya decided to make it his mission to monitor the rebellion from now on. It gave him time to be outside of that stuffy office. He watched the group of people with collars all walking and talking amongst themselves. Chuuya had some sympathy for them but not a lot. He knew they were Ace’s slaves but they were still working in the rebellion. They were a part of the problem.

His eyes widened when he saw brown hair. Of course. The note wasn’t genuine. Chuuya was stupid for thinking it might have been. There was Dazai, talking to them as if nothing happened. This proved that Dazai wasn’t doing it for him. He was doing it for his own gain.

“I-I think we need to focus on getting to the boss,” the boy with a scar on his cheek, Karma, said. Chuuya had taken the time to learn who each member of the rebellion was. The one to respond was Dazai.

“I disagree. The boss is extremely powerful. We’ve been over this. Even if all of us attacked him at once, we would lose,” Dazai said. Chuuya crossed his arms. It was strange. Even as the others talked about wanting to go after him, Dazai still refused to bring up that possibility. But that didn’t change anything. If Dazai truly felt sorry, he wouldn’t go crawling back to the people who were trying to kill him.

He turned around. He couldn’t stand to watch anymore. The person he loved so much continued to betray him again and again.

______________

Storms were always something Dazai hated. But here he was, outside during a storm. While he did technically have a place to stay, he didn’t feel comfortable staying with the rebellion. It made him feel gross.

The rain was soaking through his fur. His body reacted on instinct and ran into the stairway of Chuuya’s apartment. He wondered if Chuuya had gotten his letter or not. He turned into his human form and started to trudge up the stairs. He wanted to be inside with Chuuya. He was so miserable. Each step felt gross, his clothes squelching as he walked.

When he finally reached the top, he stopped with his hand poised to knock. Would Chuuya even want to see him? He probably hated him. The loud crash of thunder made him knock involuntarily. His heart rate spiked and he knocked over and over. He needed to be inside. It wasn’t safe to be outside in a storm. The door opened and Chuuya looked up at him disapprovingly.

“What are you doing here?” He growled. It was a tone that Dazai wasn’t used to. He was so serious. Dazai shivered from how cold he felt and Chuuya sighed, grabbing him by the arm and pulling him inside. Dazai looked around. A part of him expected Chuuya to change the entire penthouse in the time he was gone, but it all looked the same. The cat tree in the corner, the new couch, the two chairs by the table instead of only one. It was all the same. “Don’t make me repeat myself.”

“I-I-I was outside when the storm started. I-I had nowhere else to go,” Dazai’s teeth chattered as he talked. Chuuya walked off to his bedroom and returned with some of Dazai’s clothes. Dazai quickly changed, not caring that Chuuya saw him naked since it wasn’t a new sight for the ginger man. As soon as he was fully dressed, Chuuya slammed a towel on his head and started to aggressively dry it. Dazai’s head jerked back and forth with the force of Chuuya’s movements.

“You have the audacity to come here. Why didn’t you go back to all your rebellion friends?” Chuuya asked. Dazai whined. He didn’t like how Chuuya was speaking to him.

“D-Don’t lump me in with them. Didn’t you get my note?” He asked. Chuuya rolled his eyes, removing the towel from Dazai’s head.

“I did. I read it. But I saw you with them. You just went crawling back to them. If you were truly sorry for what you did, you wouldn’t go to them,” Chuuya growled. Dazai’s eyes widened. He hadn’t thought that Chuuya would find him with the rebellion. He shook his head.

“No! One of them captured me! He figured out my secret and caught me in a cage. I-I had no choice. He’s one of Ace’s slaves. I’m not helping them anymore. I have nothing to give them to help. I have no reason to help them either. The reason I was in the first place was to get the mafia to fall apart so we could be together. So you could be free. But I can see that you don’t want that,” Dazai’s voice dripped with disdain. He didn’t understand why Chuuya wouldn’t understand what he was trying to do.

“Stop lying! It was for yourself! Stop pretending like it was for me! If it was for me, you would have told me!” Chuuya yelled. Dazai growled, clenching his fists. He didn’t want to fight with Chuuya but the man refused to listen to him.

“Why can’t you understand?!” Dazai asked. He felt like he could cry. But he wouldn’t. He wasn’t the type to cry. He wasn’t weak. This was karma for him. He decided to believe the lie that someone may love him. He got too comfortable.

“Every time I try, I realize that you just wanted to use me! You tried to betray me after everything I’ve done for you. I never asked for anything from you!” Chuuya yelled back. Before the argument could go any further, he turned around and walked to the kitchen. “You can stay until the storm is over but that’s it.”

Dazai scoffed. As if he needed the help. Chuuya acted like he was a savior. He slouched against the wall. This entire situation was such a mess. He was so tired. He felt like he could sleep for a decade and still be tired. He hadn’t been getting good sleep because he had gotten too used to falling asleep in Chuuya’s arms.

The storm continued to rage on and the two of them stayed in an awkward silence. Before long, it was already night time. The clock read 10:45 PM. Chuuya sighed.

“You can take the bed. I’ll sleep on the couch,” he said. Dazai wanted to protest and say they could share the bed but he knew Chuuya would never agree to it. To him, Dazai was still a traitor. He silently got up and walked into the bedroom. He nuzzled into the blanket. It smelled like Chuuya. He loved that smell. He closed his eyes but sleep refused to come. The bed felt too big.

He turned into his cat form and softly padded out of the room and into the living room. Chuuya was under a thin blanket on the couch, sleeping. He must have been exhausted. Dazai very slowly got onto the couch. Chuuya was lying on his side with his legs slightly tucked up. It left the perfect space behind his knees for Dazai to settle. He laid down, resting his small head on Chuuya’s leg as he closed his eyes and fell asleep faster than he expected.